Vol. 4 Ch. 1 Ep. 14: The Barter System

Moe, do you have a solution for our supply issues?

W-We have no money, and n-no way of making some.

Did you call yourself the "supplies expert"? Is this the same person who wasted all of our ammunition to make some stupid fireworks?

You have no eye for art! Ammunition is never a waste in pursuit of the beauty of explosions. It was an essential sacrifice!

Do you want me to bail us out, or not? The wonderful person that I am, I can get us supplies without spending a single yen.

How could you suggest something so awful?

SRT Academy exists to protect the citizens. We would never engage in such behavior.

Sensei, do you think so little of me?

My tip-top secret for supplies acquisition is...

The barter system!

People've been bartering for things they want since before we could talk.

And so, easy peezy lemon squeezy, we'll trade off our valuable items for new and wonderful incendiaries...and weapons.

The problem with your plan lies in the fact that we have no valuables.

We have expired yakiniku bentos...

Are you a dummy? You think we're trading with those hypocrite monks?

What we do have is the missiles and bombs at the outskirts of camp. My babies.

I can't believe I'm suggesting selling off my precious babies...even if they're water-damaged.

But my bleeding heart will live knowing that a caring owner will love them the way I did. And then my beautiful, splendid babies will be detonated like they deserve.

I agree those are very expensive explosives, but they're also very broken ones. How are we going to sell them?

Am I not literally this squad's unit supply specialist? I got connections you can't even dream of.

Just to name one...

My little friend, Kaiser Industries, is a subsidiary of Kaiser Group, and they're the big guns for weapons in the Black Market. Heehee, get it? They sell to hard-up mercenaries who'll take anything they can get.

So, if anyone's gonna take good care of my rusty little babies, it's Kaiser Industries.

And, voila! In return, I get you your ammunition and guns from Kaiser itself!

I...I'm in shock. Moe came up with a really good idea.

Was there something in the bento you ate yesterday? That must be it.

I'll make you go ka-boom faster than you can say rabbit!

Well then, would you like to see the expert at work?

Greetings! Kaiser Industries, the leading purveyor of top-tier firearms. How may I help you?

Long time no talk, buddy!

It's SRT Academy's supply manager. Heehee.

Our VIP client!

Greetings! What a pleasure to speak with you again!

How can I help you today? We have some brand new missiles I think you would love.

Or... Oh, dear! Were there any issues with the cluster bomb you purchased? I would be glad to assist you with that as well.

...Moe. Did he just say cluster bomb?

A girl's gotta do what she's gotta do, right?

I used my own money, not SRT budget! And it was for personal reasons!

Actually, I wasn't looking to buy anything today.

I was hoping to sell.

Sell? Well, we don't usually allow purchases from our sales line.

But our VIP clients have special privileges! What was it you were hoping to sell?

I hope you're ready, you might blow your circuits. I've got loads of state-of-the-art stuff, stuff you won't be able to find anywhere else.

Infrared image-guided anti-aircraft missiles, scalable cluster grenades, remote-controlled anti-tank rockets...

That is quite the list of rare weaponry! You're sure you're willing to sell them?

I know, I know. The deal of the century! Imagine how your boss would praise you. There's a small matter of a little rust, but you know how it is with the humid weather.

(Shut up, Sensei! I'm trying to make a deal here!)

Well, such special equipment is always in demand. This is a little outside of protocol, but I suppose...

Very well. I accept.

Is the same account we have on file still correct for payment?

Ah, so you see, I've unfortunately been running into some issues with my account.

It should be resolved soon, but until then I was hoping to be paid in weapons and ammo instead.

...Weapons? Ammo?

I didn't stutter! I'm willing to let go of anti-aircraft missiles for a bunch of measly guns. Strong ones, of course.

Or if you have, you know, thermo-pressure grenades, or white phosphorus smoke grenades! *pant* *pant*

While I would love to assist you, we unfortunately just recently sold our entire stock of weapons.

Whaaat?! The entire stock?

Yes. An...anonymous customer recently bought us out.

Who on earth would buy that much firepower? Why?

The only reason you would need that much is to go to war!

I...cannot tell you that.

As a VIP client, you must understand. You would be rather upset if we divulged your private purchase history, no?

Well, they all know about the cluster bombs now...but yeah...

I'm terribly sorry, but let's pretend this exchange never happened.

I do hope we have more fruitful dealings in the future!

What in the world... What psychotic world do we live in that Kaiser Industries just...has no more weapons? What has this society come to?

More importantly. Moe. When and how did you become a VIP client at Kaiser Industries?

I KNEW there were discrepancies with missing inventory in the squad's supply ledger... You told me I was crazy...

M-Moe... I don't want you to go to j-jail...!

W-Wait a second! Can you guys go back to being worried about supplies?

Don't sweat the small details!

Kaiser Industries might have let me down, but you know what never does? Second-hand auctions! I already made a post, so just wait for the buyers to come rolling in!

Who's going to buy all that crazy equipment at some second-hand auction.?

You may be an uncultured neophyte, but underestimating these auctions will be your first and final mistake!

Look! A message! I told you it wouldn't let me down!

...Wait, seriously?