Entr'acte II

(Munch munch) ...

...Delicious! My Altrium is getting cleansed! Meat buns in the winter sure taste like justice!

Even on a space colony, they create a man-made winter. I thought they were just stingy with the heating...

But this alone is praiseworthy! On the other hand, red bean buns taste like corruption!

One more... Hey! This is a red bean bun! Why that guy at Vamily Mart!

...Hmm? I sense a Saber approaching!

You there! You, in the sailor uniform, standing there mysteriously! Yes, you!

...

What? I'm not giving you one even if you stare at it!

Who are you? I don't know you, but you look familiar! This is mind-boggling!

Are you a Saber!? If you are, then you're gonna get blown away!

...

...Hm? Are you cold? And hungry? Your knees are shaking... Do you have altitude sickness?

...

I guess I have no choice. Consider yourself lucky you're not a Saber. And just one. You can only take one.

Come on, hold out your hand. Whoa! It's so cold!

...

... (Munch...munch...)

...So sweet...and warm...

...You must have been hungry. Well, I'm not sure that even counts as a good deed.

Out in the vastness of space, I hear there's even a hero who lets you eat his head. Could he be from the cosmic horror genre?

Where...am I...?

Did you come here without knowing?

You're at Cosmo-Chaldea High School. It's a school attended by many young students who dream of becoming tomorrow's SSR Servants.

Cosmo...Chaldea High...?

I heard of a place around here with a ton of elite Masters, but I guess this isn't it.

Master? There are plenty of annoying teachers.

You've ditched class to eat out, X?

Oh crap, Lionhead!

I am not currently known as Lionhead! I am God Bless Edison! GBE!

I am the very first principal of the glorious Cosmo-Chaldea High!

You don't have to roar so, cathead. I can hear you. I get it.

I just bumped into someone who I guess is a transfer student. I was about to give her a tour.

A noble effort, but you still owe me 50,000 super gravity squats.

So this is her? Hm, I did not receive any word about a transfer student...

Hey. What's your name, by the way?

My...name...

...Ex...

...Ex...ah...

"Ex"? Is it just "Ex"? What a short name!

Look who's talking.

I like it. It's short and sweet! All right, Ex!

Ah...yes... That's...fine.

Very well. Ex.

I know you must want to enroll in this school, but it doesn't accept just anybody.

It's a school where heroic Servants are raised by experienced, active Servants working as teachers.

Thus, those who wish to enroll must have certain qualifications!

...Qualifications...?

Don't be stupid, principal! You were just complaining that the school is in the red because there were so many dropouts from the tough curriculum!

Those are separate issues! As different as AC and DC!

I see. So, there's not much difference.

...I want...to enroll. I want to become a great Servant.

I'll make the tuition thing work. So...please...

It seems like your words are sincere. You have passed the first entrance exam.

And while we're here. X, you be her opponent.

We'll hold a mock battle. Based on the result of that, I shall judge whether you can enroll or not!

Okay... It seems wrong that a student is in charge of testing another student, but I guess this is just what comes with being an upperclassman. I'll do it.

...Heh. In other words, a part-time job with the school principal's full permission. I'll get at least a week's worth of lunch vouchers out of this!

No. If anything, this is a secret deal. You do know that buying food from outside vendors is prohibited.

I'll turn a blind eye to it if you win. Also, if you lose to her, I will double your tuition.

Do you think that's unreasonable? No, call me a capitalistic gentleman! It just means you're going to be paying for her tuition as well!

So you're saying that whatever the outcome, the school won't lose anything, AND will gain another student!

Why you, what a sharp way of thinking! It's hard to believe you're a lion. Are you by chance human!?

I keep telling you I'm a human! Not having any toe beans is proof!

Ah, no, that's not what I mean. Ex...

X may act rowdy like she does, ditch classes, and sometimes battle active Servants...

...but she is still our star pupil. She's pretty strong. She even uses ninja skills. Will you still fight?

Star...

Yes. I will.

X, please be my opponent!

I like that attitude! I'm not going to complain about my stomach being empty, but I wholeheartedly accept any newbies with spirit!

Ex, this is payback for that red bean bun! Bring it on!

I want to eat more sweet things!

Ah...darn!

Unayaaaaaabarubarubarumo!

Special intense lectures by Nameless Red are so boring, I can't stand it!

Doubling my tuition would've been a hundred times betterOuch!

Arrrgh, there's a dent on my shin now! Hmph!

Why is there a weird black bucket in my room?

What are you, a Voloid? Are you an invention of Professor Babbagen? You are!

？！

...Hmmm, I feel something in the Altrium. A presence I haven't felt since...

...Sorry. It doesn't look like you're a defective Voloid, but electricity doesn't come free.

Um, when do the waste collectors collect trash Voloids?

Bullying...is bad. Sometimes...it gets confused.

Hm...Ex. You still need something?

That thing is with me. It's my only possession.

We're going to be roommates starting today. Please be kind to me, X.

...

Huh!? Nobody told me this! A roommate!?

I had...a single room all to myself, something that can't normally be enjoyed on backwater planets! My sweet, private school life...!

These were the orders from the student support division, so there's no mistake. Besides, this room is obviously big enough for two students.

Everything on this side of the line is my territory. This space will be our common area.

Also I'm going to pull this juice bottle out of our fridge. My snacks won't fit with that inside.

You're rolling the bottle of super extreme explosive carbonated drink, Space Sipep! Th-that'll cause an explosion!

Now that I look closely, you look a lot like me! No wonder I did so poorly in that mock battle!

Even though I held back! You really went all-out on me, and it hurt!

That... Likewise. Thank you.

There will be the two of us here from now on, so I ask you to be quieter, please.

What the... Are you taking over the room already!? Instead of waiting for you to sleep, maybe I'll slice you up right now!

？！

Careful. Black Knight, stand back. You might get caught in X's weak beam crossfires.

Are you calling my sword moves "weak beams"? Tsk. I didn't realize you were a Servant of sick burns. Are you perhaps a literary genius?

Hmph, as a science buff, I don't think you and I could get along. I suggest you move to another room

？！

Here's a lesson for you! Physical punishment! I saw it in your eyes!

Why you! Why are you protecting that Voloid!?

Because Black Knight is correct. And your reaction. You just said it yourself!

You may be a nerd, but your swordsmanship is spot-on. I actually sense that you have some formal training in your background.

Heh... Heh, heh. Interesting!

Whether you be an Assassin or Berserker, if you're a Saberface, then you're definitely a Saber!

Okay then, I'm going to get serious now! I don't have anything against you, but I will cut down all Sabers!

No That's right, I'm a Saber! Fine! That's how it will be!

By thinking that, I feel like a burden has been lifted...I think.

I understand that feeling very well! But give up, because your Saber days are over!

You two are too noisy!

Stop your fighting! If you don't, I'll put you both in swimsuits, strap you to my Noble Phantasm, and shoot you around the third moon!

...Hey, I kicked something.

？！

Huh?

Ah. I cut the little guy down on accident! Sorry! I'm really sorry! Are you all right?

Black Knight...