Esper Story: Catherine

Lady Catherine.

Let me guess. Tang Yun again?

Yes, Milady... And, uh, still about the door frame.

He will never rest until he plucks my crown from my head, will he?

Silly brat. Doesn't have the guts to face me... So? Speak. What has he come up with this time?

Mr. Tang Yun says your crown, uh, sometimes bumps up against the door frame.

And also... your, uh, exterior seems to be marking the sides too.

Hmph. Typical.

The sad cries of someone who can't handle bumping into a door frame. Or having one fall on them...

Milady, Mr. Tang Yun has instructed me to, uh...

Go on. What else does?

Mr. Tang Yun said door frame issues and damages are responsible for our, uh, financial mess.

He also said you would... suffer repercussions by not taking "appropriate steps".

I see he has developed a talent for hyperbole and alarmist talk.

If the council members and the Pillagers are so concerned with our finances, they'll lodge a formal query.

They haven't and they won't. Because they don't share Tang Yun's silly obsessions.

Thank you. Now please get out.

Ah! Apologies Milady! I didn't see you there.

Do you walk with your eyes closed?!

My sincerest apologies! I have a truckload of door frame repair bills to get through before we close. I hope Mr. Sander is still in his office...

What? Wait. What did you say? Door frames?

We've been losing and replacing a lot of door frames.

These are the repair bills. They need to be signed today.

...All for door frames?

Yeah, lately it's all been doors. Used to be institute maintenance or training ground repairs.

That is until Mr. Sander had a friendly chat with Lady Kara and Mr. Long Mian. His ultimatum must've worked, eh?

Ultimatum? Tell me more about this ultimatum.

Rumor has it Mr. Sander threatened expulsion from the Shadow Decree institute and its facilities. Since it was getting too expensive...

...

Why do you ask? Is there a problem?

Oh, no. Nothing. Don't let me keep you.

I suppose... I could do something. Maybe.

Are you... one of Catherine's?

Yes, Mr. Tang Yun.

And what are you doing by the door?

I'm here to repair this door frame under Lady Catherine's orders.

All day? Don't you have better things to do?

No, sir. Lady Catherine has asked me to prioritize this task.

She sure knows how to order people around...

What's wrong with me now? Am I not meant to give out orders?

No. Not at all. No one could claim that.

Nothing wrong? Great. Then get out of the way.

I'd hate to see someone have a bad experience with a door frame. Be a shame if they had to go crying to Sander.

Beg your pardon?

Go on.

Yes, Ma'am!

Catherine! What are you doing? The destruction of public property is...

Shush, you. I'm nipping the possibility of future door frame damage in the bud.

Our architect was an idiot. The frames are too low. That's why. Raise the height of the door frames, and the problem goes away.

...Can't you just take off your crown?

Or we can resolve it once and for all. You should be happy. You can embrace a life free from door frame worries now.

And I'll foot the bill. No one will ever receive a door frame repair bill again.

Anything else?

Hmph! Then I should thank you, Lady Catherine, for the sacrifice of your wallet.

Lady Catherine. Mr. Hall is waiting for you in the lobby.

Hall? What does he want?

He didn't elaborate at all, Milady.

Tell Mr. Hall that if he intends to invite me out on another meaningless, boring, pointless dinner, then he'll have to excuse me as I simply do not have the time.

Milady, I believe it's best if you accept Mr. Hall's invitation. It, uh, seems that he has prepared something for the occasion.

Prepared something? Does it concern vital Union intel?

It's... Apologies, Milady. I promised Mr. Hall I'd be discreet.

Well, on account of your "loyalty", I suppose I shall go see what this "surprise" is.

Catherine! Happy Birthday!

It's my birthday?

I believe you did mention once that it is today.

I got these ribbons and balloons for you. I hope you like them.

What makes you think I'd like them?

I merely...wanted to celebrate your birthday.

I don't find being born into this awful world anything to celebrate.

...I'm sorry, I... didn't mean to anger you...

I'm not angry. I just don't want to celebrate my birthday.

My birth was an extremely sad and painful occasion, a day full of curses and abandonment. I don't like anything, anything, to do with birthdays.

So stop wasting your time with birthdays and any other stupid things. Focus on your job. It's what you're here for!

Even so... I'm still hopeful this gift might brighten your day...

I selected a book on fairy tales. You mentioned once someone ripped up your book of fairy tales.

So I've been meaning to give this to you...

......

I really didn't think you'd react this way, honestly. I just wanted to brighten up your day... I...

...Catherine?

Don't take it the wrong way. I just... I'm curious what kind of fairy tales I'm about to read.

This came highly recommended by the bookstore. So I got this one.

I see. And did the bookstore also mention that it's for "children ages 3-7"?

I'm sorry... I didn't realize...

"Happy Birthday to Catherine". Incredible. It's almost legible. Almost. Tell me, did you write these crooked words yourself?

I did. And I practiced it for a long time. I guess it still isn't good enough.

If you don't like it...

I'll keep it.

You will?

But one more word, and I'm giving it back.

...Delighted to hear it!

Delighted about what?

This is actually kind of a blessing, Sorry. I guess you'd rather not hear it.

I'll give you a pass today. But don't pull anything like this ever again.

This is... This is the book I gave Catherine. Why is it here?

...I guess she didn't like it after all. But what is this scrap of paper?

...I thought that book was mine.

I had been thinking maybe you didn't want it... What's the paper?

Just some notes I took on the fanciful ideas within. Its "happily ever after" endings bothered me.

You didn't just read it? You wrote down your thoughts as well?

Have you got wool in your ears? When did I say they are my thoughts?

Sorry. But I'm... I'm delighted you liked it.

I flipped through it. I suppose it wasn't so bad.

...Good! I'll give you another birthday present next year... Uh, I mean, just a present. Not a birthday present.

Let me make it as clear as I can: no birthday presents. No presents. No gifts of any kind.

I'll be sure to pick a great fairy tale. And I'll avoid giving it on your birthday.

I said... Eh. Never mind. Do what you want.

Catherine! Come to the training grounds with me!

Uh, no? Freddy, I don't "need" to do anything.

Uh, yes you do. The training grounds are haunted. Let's go bust some ghosts.

Haunted? You actually believe in that nonsense?

I don't have the time to entertain your delusions. Have fun.

...You literally oversee the training grounds. I can't get in without you.

Fine. Then don't. Find another hobby.

What's the big deal? You aren't afraid, are you?

What nonsense...

Ghosts? Shadows in the dark most likely. How are they scary?

...But I told your guys I'm going in there to handle it. So I have to now.

Or would you rather everyone know something's going on in there?

...

Fine. Against my better judgment, I'll go on your fool's errand.

Can someone explain why no one thought to bring these problems to me first, instead of Freddy?

Lady Catherine...

Is Freddy now my second-in-command? Without me realizing?

Are you confused about who your boss is?

My deepest apologies, Milady! We, uh, didn't want to disturb you.

...And Mr. Freddy somehow overheard our conversation.

Well, someone clearly has too much free time if he's concerned about such gossip.

Tell me everything you know about the "haunting". Now.

Several witnesses have claimed... strange sounds and shadows.

Experimental subjects from the institute? Those dimwits can't keep them in check for five minutes.

Yet here you all are, cowering before a few Miramon. Useless.

It's not a Miramon. Some witnesses reported ghostly flames and hands!

Oh? Go on.

I saw it myself. I came back from a mission last night. Came down this very corridor...

Hurry up. I don't have all day.

Yes, Milady! The lights were off in the training ground. I heard a noise. I turned around and then I saw it! Fires dancing around a walking shadow!

My friend saw red eyes and bones too. It ain't no Miramon!

Damn it!

Failed! Again! What's wrong with that man?! Damn you, Bardon!

Hmph. Well, he's not getting away with it again!

Who's that...?

Underworld Presence! Huh?

Aah! Ghost!

Who was that? Did he run away? Eh. Good riddance.

I-Is someone there?

Who is it this time?

Argh! It really is a ghost!

...Great. Run away. Let me train in peace.

Red eyes? Bones? And ethereal flames?

Yes, Milady! Terrifying!

Doesn't that remind you of anyone? If you put those elements together?

Red eyes... red bones... and ethereal fire...

I'm so sorry, Lady Catherine! I didn't mean you're a ghost! Y-you're not frightening at all!

Oh no? I'm not frightening? Not even a little?

Yes, Milady! Not at all!

Really?

N-no! You're very frightening! I'm terrified! Right down in my very bones!

Too bad you're the only one who thinks so...

N-no! That's not true! Lady Catherine! Everyone thinks so! Everyone is deathly afraid of you!

...Good. I hope you remember that feeling. And that I am the source of your terror.

Yes, Ma'am!

Consider this matter now ended. You. Lock up the training ground.

But... Master Freddy is still inside.

How frustrating... Let him cool his heels for a while. He can bother me tomorrow.

......Very well, Milady.

There's nothing in here... What's the big deal? Hey... Why is the door locked?

Catherine! Did you lock me in?! Catherine! Let me out, Catherine!

Catherine? Is something wrong?

...Go ahead. I'll use another path.

You want to split up? Are you sure? Can you tell me why?

...I have a reason. A good reason.

The mission will proceed as planned. Don't worry. I'll catch up.

I'm not worried about the mission. Why? What's up?

Accept it and move on!

You stopped just as you were about to... do what? Walk into the sunlight? Is that a problem?

...Not at all.

Then... what? You're covered from head to toe. Are you worried about sunburn?

Not at all. You have some severe misunderstandings.

But I need to know what's going on. I'm your mission partner.

...Fine. It's too bright outside. The sun is affecting my... composure.

Oh? I had no idea. So you just... hate sunlight?

Must I "hate" something irritating? Then fine. Perhaps I do hate sunlight.

No wonder you prefer night missions...

But sunlight? We need sunlight. It's Vitamin D. That's good for our health.

If you want to bask in the sun's cancerous rays, you do that.

...I don't mean that.

Sunshine also boosts metabolism. You can look less pale as well.

"Those who live in darkness do not need sunlight."

Heh. Very cryptic. Come on. Try it. It's nothing to be afraid of.

...I never said I'm afraid of sunlight.

Then get some more sunlight, or it's going to affect your missions in the future.

Imagine trying to dodge sunlight while chasing Union Espers. Now that's just silly.

Alright. I'll give it a try. To... boost my metabolism.

That's right, just like so. Extend your hand into the sunlight...

Stop that. I'm not a baby.

Well, a baby probably has more experience in this department. And why did you pull your hand back?

...Go on ahead. I'm finding this a bit frustrating. Your presence, particularly.

Heh. Okay. Fine. Don't get too far behind, please.

It does sting a bit... But perhaps... I could get used to it.

Told you, didn't I? It's nice and warm under the sun.

Lynn! You... You're still here?

Silly me. Looks like I've got nothing to worry about.

That was nosy of you.

Being nosy works. Can we get a move on now?

I couldn't help but notice your absence the past few days, Catherine. You're not avoiding me, are you?

I needed a place away from your "healthy" sunlight. To get some peace and quiet.

Some people genuinely want to help, you know.

The canteen is doing pork liver noodles today. It's very vitamin-rich and helps with low iron...

Argh. Another healthy meal? I'm not hungry.

It's not just night missions. You're skipping meals too. That can't be healthy.

Health is overrated.

You're not so tough. I've seen your vitamin supplements.

If not for yourself, be healthier for the Shadow Decree. Better health means better missions.

...And I don't eat green peppers.

But other peppers are okay? They're good for you. Don't be silly.

And they're so bitter... My goodness. I'm sorry, but this meal does you no credit.

This is all I can eat. And I have an urgent mission to perform. I'm leaving.

Catherine, come back! At least eat one of the green peppers! I can see you hid them under the noodles!