IC-3 Stranger Things

So, if we want to blow up the slide and rebuild the railway, we'll have to convince the business representative, Croque Diamondface; the industry representative, Deculture Silvermint; as well as that Catch guy?

Yes, they hold the most prominent positions, and most Durins will cast their votes depending on their movements.

And why can't you do this yourself?

......

I see, you must not be very popular around here.

Would it kill you to sugar-coat it a little bit?

Seems like a major pain in the tail. But whatever, I'll treat it like a good deed for Acahualla.

So where can I find them?

Phew, it's finally over. That Gavial is pretty scary.

Seems like you're on the right path though, finally.

Are you happy now, Edge?

To be honest, I'm not sure I'm ready to part with the Great Aquapit.

Hah! Whose fault is it that the damned thing's sitting in the middle of the railway? Otherwise I really wouldn't have been able to find a single person willing to knock that thing down!

Yeah, but I did just have an idea. It's been more than half a year since the dome broke and the waterfall started coming down.

Everyone's been having a great time, but I'm sure they're starting to get tired of it.

Why don't we take this opportunity to build something brand new? I think you were talking to Catch about a super water cannon or something, and it's on everyone's lips now!

And I'm not gonna lie, I'm also a little intrigued...

...*sigh*.

That Archosauria woman! Brutish, uncouth, impetuous, and presumptuous! Can you believe it, Croque? I was having a bit of writer's block, so I went up to the caves to harvest some wild tea and relax...

And someone scooped you up and jumped off the top of the waterfall.

Utterly unthinkable.

Regrettably, I'm afraid that no ordinary Zeruertzan would be able to resist the seduction of that story. If it were put to paper, it would become an overnight sensation.

'You can trust me.' 'Avdotya, hold on tight.' Ahh, it hits all those passionate notes.

Forget it!

It certainly beats your umpteenth story about the snow.

Speaking of which, a couple days ago, a few kids came by to talk to me about those short stories. I thought I was finally getting some readers...

What'd they have to say?

'Really funny. I want to see what happens next.'

I knew it.

Avdotya, they didn't mean any harm. It's just that we Durins have no way of relating to your experiences.

How long did it take for me to finally understand a sliver of your background? Let's not even talk about ordinary Durins.

None of us have seen real snow, let alone the kind that you describe... How do you pronounce those words again? 'Chiaroscuro'? 'Ephemeral'?

It'd be better if those words only existed in literature.

Regardless, I'm happy with my life now. I don't try to control anyone, nobody tries to control me. There are no terror plots brewing behind the scenes, no risk of getting framed, no getting dragged into an assassination.

I write a few ads and design a few signs for our shopping district, and that's enough to keep me fed. What more could I ask for?

I spend my days bathing beneath the sun on my recliner. Sure, it might be an artificial light source, but that's enough for me.

I was hoping these tranquil days would continue forever, until...

Is this the office of the business representative, Croque Diamondface?

Hello, I want to blow up that big slide.

......

...*sigh*.

Yo, Avdotya, fancy seeing you here!

She doesn't look too good.

Sorry, Croque, I'm afraid I have to excuse myself.

I need to head back and perform some maintenance on my crossbow.

Did I do something to make her mad?

Ahem... Are you the guests who just arrived in Zeruertza? I heard Catch talking about you earlier.

I must say, his assessment of the situation was on the nose.

'A merry bunch more Durin than Durins.'

Evasive maneuvers! Evasive maneuvers!

Hmm, what a weird design. Couldn't be more different from Lancet-2.

Please stay back!

Doesn't seem as smart as her, but it does share some of her same basic reactions. Wonder how this thing works?

Danger level: high! Stay back, stranger.

Take it easy, little fella. My name's Zumama. I'm not going to hurt you.

Defining identity, Zumama.

What's your name?

Attributes: Model R3-E3 assistant robot, number 0429, for the glory of serving the Durin people.

Hi there, 0429. Is there something wrong with your shock absorber system? You're wobbling all over the place.

Self-inspection report: End of service life: approaching. Original components: aging.

I can help. Look, I have a whole set of maintenance tools.

Overhaul... Determining probability of success: low. R3-E3 will be scrapped after service life ends.

From what I've seen, little fella, there's nothing major wrong with you. Probably nothing a few screws can't fix, so don't give up on yourself just yet.

You're a cutie, so I'd like to help you. How about it?

We can be friends.

Friends? Unable to comprehend: friend.

You can help me conduct an overhaul?

Sure can.

But I'll have to open up your shell first.

No. Requesting mission cancellation, requesting mission cancellation. Danger, danger!

Don't run away! It'll be fine!

Did I just see a surface-dweller Phidia chasing after an assistant robot?

Well that's odd. Did I drink too much yesterday?

Speaking of which, Avdotya writes about this kind of stuff, doesn't she? About 'chasing and killing' and whatnot, even if I can't understand half of it.

Well, uh, I guess I'm starting to get why she keeps saying it's not meant to be a comedy.

Care for some tea, Miss Inam?

So, Durins actually do have non-alcoholic drinks.

Everyone needs a change of pace every now and then. Plus, ahem, I AM still at work, after all. I prefer to drink on my own time.

You suggested we talk one-on-one.

I have no doubts about Gavial's skills in a fight, but I don't think her fists will be very helpful here.

After all, we're not so different. You, the business representative of Zeruertza, and I.

I see that you're the type to talk trade. Fine by me, I'm on board.

Zeruertza is just a small Durin settlement. A few years ago, when we were still connected to the other cities, I did have a semblance of a job as the business representative.

But ever since the last earthquake, our sole railroad has been cut off. Zeruertza is fortunate enough to be self-sufficient, the citizens aren't the neediest and there's been little urgency to restore our ties with the outside.

Nowadays, my job is little more than catering to the whims of Zeruertza's populace and pushing out a few entertainment activities.

Throw my weight around with the hawkers near the Great Aquapit, advertise some self-driving cart parts. It's a leisurely life.

I don't know much about Durin philosophy, but does 'not being the neediest' normally mean getting piss drunk and going surfing?

Pretty much.

But if you asked anyone up on the surface...

Pretty much. By our standards, that's not very needy.

So, it doesn't matter what terms Stitch laid out for you. If you want me to go along with your plan to blow up the water slide, you'll have to come up with something that'll impress me.

No business gets done until both sides find the deal amenable.

What can you offer Zeruertza's economy? Acahuallan artifacts aren't enough.

I heard some sharp self-driving cart dealers already used your grand entrance to generate some excitement for their wares, but that's not enough either.

You... understand the way we do things on the surface better than I expected.

Though I haven't been up there surface myself, the library we have here in the city isn't just for show.

I am familiar with your customs.

The Acahuallans dance around a Metal Crab without sleep or rest, and the last one standing becomes the Great Chief. Isn't that right?

Where did you hear that?

I read it in 'Stranger Things.' It's the most popular periodical in Zeruertza. Back in the day, a great adventurer brought a whole big set down from the surface. It's basically our encyclopedia of the surface world.

That's just a lousy tabloid!

Surely you're mistaken... You have no idea how diligently I studied Sargonian to be able to read those books.

No wonder your accent sounds almost native.

Welp, there goes my motivation all of a sudden. I feel like I could probably just bribe you with the last few issues of 'Stranger Things.'

The most recent ones? There are sequels to those books?! Hmm... If you really could procure those, then maybe I could consider it...

I can hook you up with some good stuff.

What is this?

A videotape. Want to take a look?

Found you.

Oh, Avdotya, what a coincidence. Are you here to enjoy the scenery again?

Be frank with me — why did you people come here?

Miss Inam said she'd handle the discussions with Miss Croque, so the rest of us came out here to find Zumama.

That's not what I mean. Why did you surface people come down into our city? What's your real purpose?

I've been guarding the Super Convenient Lift-o-Matic #1 for a long time. Where's the main battalion backing you? Have Sargon's lords ameer finally taken an interest in the wealth underground?

This city doesn't have the loot you want. Leave, unless you want to poison this peaceful little city with bloodshed.

I told you, this is a misunderstanding. Stitch was trying to find someone to help him repair the railway, and tricked us into coming here.

You mean you're his slave labor? And you're okay with that?

Hey.

That guy was acting like the sky was falling at the time, and Tomimi added her own creative touch... *sigh*, I was worried half to death, Zumama was up all night prepping for a tough fight, and we rushed over as fast as we could.

*sniffle*... Sorry, I just wanted Gavial to take some time off...

Well, it worked out... I guess I'll take this opportunity for a little vacation.

So... You people really don't have any ill intent? You weren't ordered by some noble to ransack the town?

Believe me or not. Your call.

You do have a point... Even Sargon wouldn't ask someone as rude as you to serve them.

Rude? I just don't like wasting my breath.

My plan's simple and straightforward. Help out that little runt Stitch, pick up some useful tech for us Tiacauh, and then go home. That's all.

There's still a bunch of patients back at Rhodes Island waiting for me to check on 'em.

You're telling me you're a doctor?

What, do I not look the part? I'm licensed and everything.

If Miss Tomimi here said that she was a doctor, I'd be half-inclined to believe her for a few seconds.

Oh, I can be a doctor too! Gavial taught me anesthesia!

Find the right spot, and then give it a good whack––

Everyone at Rhodes Island calls it, uh, 'Gaviallic kinetic anesthesia.'

For crying out loud, it's a non-conventional modality. Even I rarely use it outside of extremely special circumstances.

For example, when you've just run out of anesthesia and you lost your supply bag because you were beating the bad guys with it, stuff like that.

––I think I'll keep an eye on you people after all.

Don't get any funny ideas. Zeruertza is my haven of peace, and I won't let you destroy it.

Go nuts.

I'll make sure you leave Zeruertza after doing what you said you're here to do.

Well, until then, why don't we check out the shops?

Um, Miss Avdotya... You're from these parts, so would you mind showing us around Zeruertza?

Just a word of warning... If your plan is to case the city and map it, you'd give up on that.

N-No, that's not it! What I mean is...

I absolutely love your outfit! Are there any Durin fashion outlets worth visiting? I... really want to go take a look!

Huh...?

Alright, if that's what you want... There are a few places worth going to.

Are you interested in seeing some Durin jewelry?

I am!!

Stitch––

What are you doing here, Catch?

You used to always lock yourself in your room. What's the occasion?

Look, even I want to catch some rays every now and then. Surely you didn't come all the way out here just to say that?

You're trying to blow up my slide, and you're not even going to let me talk to you?

...Hmph. So you know.

Master Edge told me.

That decrepit old... Are you here to get a confession out of me?

Actually, I'm not opposed to it. This summer has gone on far too long.

And as architects, our best work is always the next project, right?

Gah. I hate that part of you more than anything else.

Which?

You don't have a single serious bone in your body.

Hahaha, I'll take that as the highest compliment!

I'll agree to whatever you want with the slide, on the condition that we talk about the dome.

What's there to talk about?

Let's go take a walk. You should experience the Great Aquapit for yourself before deciding whether to blow it up, no?

Do you have more? Where can I get the next one?!

Pwaaah! That's the good stuff! Inam, want me to pour you some more?

I still haven't finished mine...

C'mon, hurry it up~

It's a shame Team Red Wine and Coffee didn't win the championship! Ahh, they were just one step away from that ship!

You seem to be enjoying yourself.

I must admit, you surface-dwellers lead slightly more interesting lives than I imagined!

What is this a recording of?

The Dossoles Warrior Championship. It's an old video I got from a friend who runs a caravan.

I heard something happened there not too long ago, and I don't know if the event has been held these last few years.

Ahhhh! I want to see more! I want to see the losers make a comeback next year!

Croque, even the most boring form of recreation can become quite stimulating if you spice things up with a bit of competition.

You cheer for the team you support while chugging ale with your friends. I don't think any Durin would be able to turn down this lifestyle.

Plus, alcohol and fast food sales generally double during a competition. How about it? I think it'd fit the Durins like a glove.

Alcohol sells well enough in this city, and I doubt there's any need to hold a competition to stimulate those sales.

That said, hmm... From the perspective of fun and entertainment, there is a certain appeal.

Let me say this to you straight, business representative.

Want to build a super water racetrack?

I feel... New. Complete.

Hahaha, you can stop circling me now, little fella. I'm just as happy to see you good as new.

Zumama: skilled at overhauls.

Zumama, requesting favor. Small favor.

0428, partner: already retired. No longer responding to communication. Requesting assistance.

Shipped along with this machine, built in the same factory. Now, no longer responding.

No longer responding?

Don't worry. Take me to see it.

Zumama, this way.

......

These components, and this design... Hmm, might be a bit more complicated than routine maintenance.

How does this thing work? And what's this component for? It's nothing like Lancet, and I don't think Closure has ever said anything about these.

If I connect it here... No, I should be more careful. This is your friend after all, right?

Friend? Zumama has described this relationship several times. But I do not understand it.

Repair cannot be performed?

If only I had some information to work from...

Information? The library, preserves information.

Can you take me there?

Assisting in navigation is my glorious mission. Zumama, this way please.

Now that's something you don't see every day.

I've never heard of anything like that in the books. Surface-dwellers are worth looking into.

Elysium, let's have a little race to see who can fly out face-first from the super spinny slide the fastest. How about it?

Hah, you're about to see why they call me Rhodes Island's Legendary Aqua-Man!

Thorns has nothing on me when it comes to this game!

I'll be honest here. I don't have the slightest bit of interest in hanging out with you. I'd rather be eaten by one of the gloompincers in that damned Acahuallan jungle.

Don't be like that, Stitch. I just want to hear your opinion.

Regardless of what the people of Zeruertza think, I know who's truly worth their mettle in this town – and that includes both you and your teacher. You've earned it.

I've never seen anything like Zeruertza's breathtaking dome in any piece of Durin architectural literature. If you could...

If that's what you want to talk to me about, I suggest we stop here before wasting any more of each other's time.

I know you're not so into my Great Aquapit's design. Same goes for the slide, and the fountain. None of them are exactly masterpieces.

But, Stitch, do you know what is I really want to design? Same as you, the dome right over our heads! We were competing over it for the longest time!

Haha, you've got some nerve saying that to my face. Are you trying to pick a fight?

You and I make good rivals.

Hah! Good rivals? You sure think highly of me. Should we hug it out? Put our arms around each other and weep?

I'm serious, Stitch.

I just want to know. Why did you give up on the dome renovation project a few years ago?

You stopped submitting your designs to the referendums. You just quit. You couldn't have given up trying to win people over to your aesthetic?

Were you really fine with Master Finch's unannounced farewell? He's still your...

Stop talking down to me, Catch!

I just got bored. Tired of it all. Simple as that.

I got fed up with trying to pin all my ambitions on this broken dome, and trying to get the people here to vote for me.

I got fed up with peddling solutions against 'architects with dreams' like you. It's all completely pointless!

Listen up. That piece of junk over our heads, I don't care if it leaks or explodes or even if you vote to tear it down one day––

I don't give a damn anymore. So do whatever the hell you want with it!

But that dome is your teacher's...

I'll say it again.

I!

Don't!

Give!

A!

Damn!

*sigh*... Alright.

Stitch, I wanted to ask you to work with me. The two of us could've come up with a brand-new plan for the dome, which I'm sure the vast majority of people here would've agreed to.

But since you don't care about the dome anymore, I won't push you. I respect your decision.

But, could you give me a moment of your time and offer me some feedback about my ideas for renovating the dome? I'd like your advice as well.

I don't care–– Actually, let's just hear it first.

Really? I appreciate it!

First, I think the whole thing should be more colorful.

Intricate geometric patterns can greatly add to the beauty of the dome, just like stained glass!

The juxtaposition of yellow, green, red, and blue! We'll let the citizens of Zeruertza know a new kind of beauty when they cast their eyes up!

Day or night, the new dome will become the singular focal point of everyone's attention! It'll be the safe harbor everyone comes back to in their search for peace of mind!

A great, dazzling gemstone!

What do you think? From my perspective, it's a brilliant, innovative design. I'm really proud of it. But I'm ready to take your feedback seriously.

Catch.

Had a change of heart already? Then, we'll be partners...

You're not laying a single finger on the dome. I'm going to do everything in my power to stop you.

Didn't you just say you didn't give a damn anymore, and I could do whatever I want?

I thought you just wanted to resurrect that shambling corpse. Or put it to rest permanently. That, I don't care about.

But I will not allow you to desecrate it in this manner!

Huh? This is entirely a product of my respect for the dome.

No. No way in hell. I swear I'm going to beat that idea out of your head!

Maintenance materials, library. Location: Sorted Archives, Area 59. Available bookshelf.

Is this the place?

Affirmative.

Let me see... Hm, is this Durin text? I can't read it at all.

Reading. Book titles: 'The Durin: To the Surface and Back Again' and 'Fine Durin Liquor: 127 Commonly-Seen Brewing Methods.'

Continuing search. New hits: 'Believe It Or Not! Super Crazy Durin Masterplans' 'Research on Cybernetics Information Theory Based on the Influence of Social Behavior'....

Little fella, are you sure they have what we're looking for here?

Probability: 42.377%. Durins rarely organize things.

Hmm, I can read some of the words over here.

The issues of 'Stranger Things' on these three bookshelves are more than ten years old. This row is for Victorian books... and you even have Kazimierz's 'The Red Wine'?

We use them to learn different languages, cultures, and news from the surface.

I see. No wonder why there's hardly any communication barrier between us.

Is this a Durin-published magazine? 'Breaking News! Attack of the Self-Driving Cart!', order one magazine and get a prototype for free... So that's what all those gadgets zipping around outside are?

Croque seriously pushed her cart modification business, and sold those add-on booster packs throughout Zeruertza.

She said, 'everyone likes a bit of randomness,' but I don't really get it.

But why is this in Sargonian?

In order to carry on the fine tradition of 'Stranger Things,' we decided that our own magazine should also be in Sargonian! It's how Durins think.

Are you looking for this book? 'Build Your Own Assistant Robot in 3 Seconds.'

That sounds like it could come in handy. Thank you.

Deculture! 0429 says hello!

You two know each other?

Hello, allow me to introduce myself. I am Deculture Silvermint, the industry representative of Zeruertza.

And also administrator of the assistant robots.

The administrator...

That's right. The assistant robots in Zeruertza are built, supervised, and governed by me.

Model R3-E3 Assistant Robot #0429, what are you doing here?

This unit, submitted a request to Zumama. Overhaul 0428.

0428 has already been retired. Now return to your post.

...Acknowledged. Executing directive.

Zumama, your communication with that assistant robot is pretty unusual, and its responses have been... abnormal.

What's unusual about our communication?

I can't say for sure. Maybe what's unusual is... the communication itself?

You don't talk to the little fellas?

No... They were made just to work.

That's no good. I talk to my Lancet all the time. She's like a big sister to me, letting me lean up against her cold, metal shell, patting me on the shoulder with her robotic arm, singing to me with her beautiful synth...

...Huh?

'Stranger Things' never mentioned anything like that.

Hehe, that was worth the trip!

I wasn't able to find the right outfit, but these little trinkets are awesome! Ores I've never seen before, these strange metal wind chimes, as well as these cute little pendants...

And most importantly! Gavial helped me pick this out...

The only thing that could be better is if Gavial bought a matching set with me!

Is she alright?

Oh, yeah, it's fine. The kid's been like that ever since she was little.

I've read that this obsessive hoarding behavior is called 'Zalak's Disease' in some places. It might be stress-induced or something.

No, no, I'm really happy! These memories are very precious to me!

Okay, if you say so.

So, Avdotya, you have an Ursus name. Is that where you came from originally?

My name is Avdotya Razorpen. A standard Durin name.

But, Avdotya is still Ursine.

What are you getting at?

Calm down, I'm just making small talk.

No... that place is not my home. I just happened to come from there.

What I really don't understand is why you're so paranoid about the surface.

......

When I was little, I loved spending time with the grammar tutor my parents hired for me. Though she could be a bit dry, she sometimes said really interesting things.

Ursus has a lot of literature describing one's hometown, and my tutor was always entranced by those works. We would analyze their motifs, their composition styles...

Back then, I thought everyone would grow nostalgic for their hometown, and people who traveled far away would eventually find their way back to slumber eternally...

But I later found out that's not true at all. If all the memories you have of your hometown are painful ones, and you find a place more suitable to be your home, then why should you yearn for a place you once were?

It is no different from another stop on a long journey.

Miss Avdotya, what made you decide to leave Ursus?

...I don't want to talk about it.

Things that would make you vomit. My status, my family, my friends, all vanished overnight. I fled with my tail between my legs, quite literally.

From Ursus, to Sargon, to an underground Durin city... Your journey couldn't have been easy.

How could there be a journey with no destination?

I just happened to get lucky. I finally found this place, a small city called Zeruertza.

The Durins here accepted me, and I will repay the debt with even greater kindness.

This is the place I've decided I belong.

And that's why I won't let anything harm them. I don't care if it's out of malice, or out of good intentions gone awry.

That is my warning to you.

Alright...

I was going to ask you to have a drink, just as a show of goodwill. But maybe not––

Wait.

That isn't off the table.

––Ahhh.

Yeah. The way you drink definitely screams Ursus.

Shut up. Durins drink the same way.

To be honest, I'm not much of a psychologist. There are a lot of things I don't understand about the human heart, and I don't really care to understand it. It's already hard enough patching up the body.

But what I can say is, you can never really become a Durin, no matter how much you act like one.

I don't think we know each other well enough to start picking out each others' problems.

I overheard you talking with some of those Durin shopkeepers. The gist I got was that the stories you wrote about snowfields didn't seem to strike the right note with them.

That's right... They have neither snow nor fields underground.

Just to be clear, I don't write like that because I miss being there. It's nothing more than... a plot of land for a story to take place on.

You know that there's a story to be told there. That by itself isn't Durin.

Some scars can't be covered up after all.

But that won't stop me from trying.

Even if you just be yourself, the Durins will still accept you.

What if I want a new self?

Fine.

Sure, the Durins are always happy to accept anyone they meet. This time, it was you people, and me. What about next time?

Since you are a doctor, you must have seen the evil lurking in men's hearts. You've surely seen the depravity to which people will stoop in order to hurt one another.

I won't act like this is a racial issue. Everything on the surface has shaped us into this. All too quick to resort to violence, lusting after power and money, blinded by ambition...

I used to be soaked in it. Now, I want a new self.

Evil is contagious, and can be learned. The people underground have never experienced it, and have no resistance to evil.

You're right, I can't become a Durin. But for the sake of the people of Zeruertza, I am willing to do everything in my power to protect it.

––I will protect this idyllic, unspoiled innocence.

Didn't you say before that the Durins can handle their own problems?

Stop using my own words against me!