A Clockwork Crush

Aldo?

Hmm. They're playing the "The 101st Proposal." I feel like I've heard of it before.

The movie is a sequel that continues straight on from "The 101st Purrposal." The previous movie is renowned for a cute cat actor. People started to propose after watching the movie. It became quite the trend.

Sounds like fun.

I have no idea why, but...

I'm kinda intrigued.

Very well, shall we view this film toget...

Wait...wait one moment!

If you are seeing that film, allow me to accompany you.

...What?!

Unknown android. Please identify yourself.

You do not appear in my memory banks.

I am BF1=KMN, an all-purpose android.

BF1=KMN? I am a Riica model civil service droid. Please address me as Riica.

Understood, Riica. Now then, please allow me to escort you into the cinema.

Negative. Please identify and confirm your justification for watching the movie together.

Because...I am...

Because I am in love with you!

The first time we met, it was as if my circuitry was struck by lightning!

Hey, Riica. Can androids even feel love?

It depends on an individual android's programming, but it is possible. I cannot confirm if it is the same type of love that humans feel however.

Hmm, interesting...

Riica? What kind of relationship do you maintain with that man there?

Aldo is my traveling companion.

I see. I am relieved to hear that. So it is not a special relationship.

Please, Riica. Allow me to take your metal hand in marriage!

......

What are you gonna do, Riica? He just proposed to you!

......

Riica, what's wrong?

Hah!

What a strange event. I froze for a moment there!

So Riica, what do you say?

Cannot confirm. Insufficient information about you.

Even so, to propose so suddenly...

As you wish. I will now transmit all necessary information about me. Please advise?

That would create a storage overload!

I think we should take it slowly and get to know each other more first. I'd rather not incur any computational overheads.

Understood. Dating must be completed before marriage. Shall we start then?

Ok. If it's just dating then...

So you're not against the idea at all, Riica? If they carry on like this, they really could get married...

Though having said that... Hey, Riica. Can androids even get married?

Well... My memory banks suggest it's never happened before!

Is that right? So why did this android propose to you then?

......

...Explanation acquired. It must be a prank.

A prank? You mean there's someone playing a prank on you?

Affirmative. And I know exactly who would do such a thing! My readings have indicated a 99% chance that it's her...

Sebastia!

This certainly seems like something she would and could do. Maybe it's one of her experiments?

Right then. BF1=KMN, please accompany us to Sebastia's location.

Request approved. Is it a date?

Negative! Anyway, let's head to Sebastia's house!

Sebastia! I have everything about your plan deduced! Your prank failed!

Huh? What are you talking about, Riica?

Do not try to deny it. My ocular sensors can see right through your act.

Seriously?!

Haha, so you know? Wow Riica, you're pretty good!

No way! So you really were behind this, Sebastia?

Affirmative. Confession confirmed.

But...my plan was perfect. What gave it away?

Huh? What do you mean?

Was it the counter sensor every time Riica went the wrong way? Or perhaps the cute little sound effect that goes off whenever she walks?

I got it! It must be the voice speaker device! Riica's voice randomly goes all weird sometimes, doesn't it!

You...you did all that?!

Wait...that's not it?

Quit with the act! We've bought the evidence with us!

BF1=KMN!

Hmm. What's with that android?

Still feigning ignorance? You programmed his AI to propose to me, didn't you?

Are you serious?! Why didn't you tell me about this sooner?! *sigh* I would've loved to see what an android proposal looked like!

Wait, I just realized... Your camera eye should have been recording everything.

So we should still have it!

Judging by your response... It appears you really didn't have anything to do with this, Sebastia.

I said I didn't, didn't I?

Now then, what are you anyway?

It is a pleasure to meet you. I am BF1=KMN.

I am Riica's fiance!

Wait?! You said yes?!

Negative! We are currently in the dating period in preparation to get married!

You say that... But doesn't that mean you're engaged?

So let me get this straight. An all-purpose android proposed to you? It that's true then...

What is it Sebastia? Do you know something?

Maybe. Let me check something real quick. I won't be long!

She says that, but just how long is she going to take?

I shall now enter sleep mode to conserve battery.

Please wait, Riica! Let's go on our date now!

Negative. We can't exactly leave here.

Affirmative. Therefore, I propose we have a stay-at-home date night. The movie you were watching before is available for download. Shall we watch it together?

You mean... "The 101st Proposal"? Well, it is meant for couples.

Preparing data link... I can feel the chips in my circuitry shaking erratically...

Affirmative. As am I. My core unit temperature is rising to unprecedented levels.

Haha! This is the first time I've seen you been this girly, Riica.

Beginning video data download from private data service.

...Download complete.

Security check complete. Beginning movie!

......

......

What the...? What are you guys doing?

Movie complete! Date concluded!

The data compression technology was impressive. It still allowed for high image quality. First date successfully completed.

But how?! Are you two done already?

Affirmative. Datalink allows us to disperse the image playback process and view the movie at top speed.

Our first joint program!

But... A date should be more like... You feel some sort of excitement and enjoy the atmosphere.

Processing... Did you enjoy the movie?

It is statistically proven. Nothing can beat the combination of small mammals and children!

Well, if that's the best you guys can do then...

I knew she was behind this.

She?

Professor Madoka! Making androids fall in love is something that she would come up with!

I do not understand...

C'mon, you remember the Madoka Report, don't cha?

Oh, yeah. It was more like a diary if anything.

That's the one. Well I did some more digging and found this in the report. She said something like "I bet Riica could do with a boyfriend... Hehehe."

So Professor Madoka did this for me?

It looks that way. She installed something on this Android. Perhaps a temporary virus?

What would be the best procedure to deal with it?

Are you sure you want to do that?

I do not understand what you mean. If he is infected with a virus we must hurry and remove it immediately.

Hmm. I can do it. But it'll be difficult to run an accurate scan with this equipment I've got. The full maintenance pods in the Xeno-Domain should do the trick though!

Do you perhaps mean the thing Galliard used in Professor Chronos' room?

That's the one. I'll show you how to perform an accurate scan so you lot can get going.

Huh? You're not coming with us, Sebastia?

For an engineer like me, it does sound fun... But the Administrator was really mad about that whole reviving Galliard thing. They've blocked off the Xeno-Domain for now so no one goes in or out of that place.

...Or so they thought, hehe.

......

Shall we be on our way? Aldo? BF1=KMN?

Request approved. Is it a date?

Negative! You are in an emergency situation! We must hurry to the Xeno-Domain.

Do not worry...

What is it?

Please look out from the window. The view is...

Woah, what a view... I always assumed it would be incredible, but to see it with your own eyes is something else.

So even androids can appreciate a view like this. I'm glad to see it.

Affirmative. It is beautiful. The electro-magnetic wavelengths circling our earth are beautifully harmonious.

They look even better when hit with visible light.

Wait, what? I guess they really are wired up differently to humans...

What say you, Riica? Will you venture outside and view the electro-magnetic waves on such a fine day...

And float in outer space with me?

Float together? I suppose it is a standard dating procedure.

Aren't you getting that confused with a stroll in the park?

We androids have different considerations compared to humans.

Now commencing observations. Activating long range radar, and laser measuring device.

Datalink confirmed.

Electro-magnetic wave status acquired. Debris totaling 30 units. 40 asteroids confirmed!

The form of the 26th asteroid is very cute!

The results of the spectral analysis are also most refined.

Wait...a star is shooting by.

It must be a fragment which separated from the 17th asteroid. On its current trajectory, it will soon burn up in the atmosphere. A true shooting star.

......

......

My database does not produce a match for that...shooting star...

A-Aldo! I turned my radar off so I didn't notice him!

......

...... ......!

Mayday! Mayday! Emergency Rescue!

Phew... I thought I was gonna die.

Are you okay, Aldo? Humans cannot maintain life out in the void of space!

Why did you do that?

Well... I saw you guys having so much fun from the window. I also wanted to join in...

Aldo, please demonstrate a little more caution next time!

Right! I'll be careful next time. Space can be a scary place. I've learnt my lesson.

Now then, I will begin the pod preparations. BF1=KMN, please enter the pod.

What do you think, Riica?

Something is off. There is no evidence of his AI being controlled externally. There is also no trace of a virus internally.

So what you're saying is, it's not Professor Madoka that's behind this?

Affirmative. Neither Professor Madoka or Professor Chronos are behind this.

Say, Riica. Haven't you seen enough by now? It looks like androids really do feel love. There has to be something about you he finds attractive.

My attractiveness is a given but... I must know!

If I do this, I can search BF1=KMN's entire memory banks!

I can locate the moment he fell in love with me!

Hold on, Riica. Are you sure you want to do that? Nothing good will come of it if you find out, right? I mean, it's his memories, after all! It's probably best not to intrude.

In principle you are correct. However...

We are not humans. We are androids! So there is not a problem!

Really?!

Computer! Begin searching through everything in his memory banks!

This district is off limits to missile-wielding robots.

What? Why, the nerve of you!

I will escort you off the premises. Follow me, and keep your missiles holstered.

To do that...

Would besmirch my maidenly honor!

...!

That was... The moment BF1=KMN fell in love with me?

He did say it was like his circuitry was struck by lightning...

But then that means he wasn't actually far off!

...... It appears I've found out the one behind all this.

What? Seriously?!

Yes. The criminal...

Is that cat! There is no further doubt about it. This is Riicat's doing!

It must have done something when the android was attacked!

You think so? I mean, I wouldn't know, but if you say so...

Affirmative. I calculate my assumption to be...more than 87% accurate!

I got it. Let's go see Riicat and ask her directly. If I remember correctly, it lives on the Riftbreaker, right?

Affirmative! Let's head for the Riftbreaker!

Meowtron!

Huh? That sounded like Riicat?

Affirmative. It came from that room!

Meeeeooowtron♪

Meow

Who would've guessed it. There's another robot cat here too.

......

They look pretty close. Do you think that's her boyfriend?

So that's what she's planning!

Wh-What do you mean, Riica?

Riicat's motivation, confirmed! The reason why she programmed BF1=KMN to propose to me is because...

She wants to go on a double date!

A...double date?

Meowtron!

Meow

Do you really think so?

Of course! Double dates are scientifically proven to be an effective way to reduce tension between couples!

Umm. So you agree with Riica?

Affirmative. Of course I do.

Oh, OG Riica! How have you been?

You are a naughty little cat! I can not believe I was betrayed by my own little sister!

Betrayed? What do you mean by that, OG?

You reprogrammed BF1=KMN's AI, didn't you? All for your little double date!

Meowtron? What you are saying does not compute!

Feigning ignorance too, are you? You bite the hand of the one who feeds you! And I considered you my little sister...

I will not forgive you!

Meowtron? Meaning unknown! Riica, I recommend you run your self-diagnostic program.

So you're sticking to that story...? Fine! I will deactivate my cat raising program "Squish Squash α"!

You actually had a program like that?

Initializing instinctive measures raising program "Flehman Ω"!

Instinctive...measures? What's that?

I mean I will physically show her who is the boss around here!

You mean primitive measures, right?!

Cannot compute. Initializing escape mode!

Escape prohibited!

H-Hey! Wait up, Riica!

Please, wait for me, Riica!

Meow?

Meow! Please save me! Her circuits are malfunctioning!

Her? Are you talking about Riica?

That's right! Please Synth Hydra, do something!

I have you cornered now!

Now! Be a good girl and sit there quietly while I initiate raising program "Flehman Ω"!

Meeeeooowtron!

Hmm...I am unsure as to what has happened here. However, be at ease, Riicat.

Meowzon!

Who could deny a polite request from a young lady? Certainly not a gentleman battleship like myself.

That's why they call me Synth Hydra Z!

Meowcron.

Wait a minute! I'm a young lady too you know?

Ngh!

Now he's conflicted... Good plan, Riica!

I am the most honorable of battleships.

Therefore, small young girls take priority over young ones.

Protecting the children. That's why they call me Synth Hydra Z!

If you are going interfere, I will not forgive you either! Disciplining my younger sister is very important!

We did it!

How do you like that, Synth Hydra! Please do not interfere any further!

Nrgh... Forgive me...

Now then, I will take my time and initiate "Flehman Ω"!

Umm, OG...

Well well well! Couldn't settle this dispute eh? Synth Hydra!

I'll back you up with my extraordinarily cool attack! Take this!

What?! You're kidding?

Aaaaaaaaaaaah!

This is bad! Everyone get down!

Gaaaaaaah!

Damn it! Are you okay, Synth Hydra?!

......

Emergency! The Synth Hydra is not waking up!

This is bad! The Riftbreaker's going to fall!

Come on, Synth Hydra! You gotta open your eyes!

......

Synth Hydra!

That was quite the close one.

It certainly was.

Just before we crashed, the Synth Hydra came around and saved us.

This time you will not escape. Now hurry and repair the device you installed in BF1=KMN's AI.

Please forgive me, OG. But I really don't know what you mean.

Hey Riica. From what I can see, I don't think she's lying...

Affirmative. My sensor readings indicate she is telling the truth.

Curious... You mentioned that android is not designed for battle. Is it not strange that he didn't exhibit any damage after receiving an electrical attack?

That is strange!

If so, then is it possible he's just malfunctioning because of a simple accident?

Please forgive me. I will not doubt you again!

It's okay, OG. As long as we've cleared up that little misunderstanding!

Riicat!

OG!

What about you? If you are really malfunctioning, we should take you to Sebastia to get you fixed.

If I have taken damage then I would like to be repaired immediately. I could not call myself an android if I were to malfunction, and be rendered useless. An android that can not complete its assignment, mission, or duty has no value to offer.

But if you were you love with Riica because of the accident then maybe...

There is no need for concern, Aldo. My feelings for Riica will live on forever.

......

Gotcha. Okay then. Next stop, lets head for Sebastia's House.

Yep, the AI circuits have taken quite the battering. The whole thing's shorted out.

If you guys didn't run the analysis on the data and found out about the electrical attack... I don't think I would have ever found this.

I am relieved we did! With this, we can return BF1=KMN back to his former self!

I was able to analyze his current diagnostics. So fixing him should be a piece of cake.

Hey...Riica.... Do you really want me to fix him?

Why would you ask such a thing? Maintenance to us androids is of the utmost importance, isn't it?

I guess so... But you, Riica. You're more like a human so... No... Forget it...

You know, Riica. I've been thinking. Do you remember how this android fell in love with you because of the accident?

Was it really a coincidence? I think it's more like a miracle that it happened.

Indeed. The likelihood of it happening is extremely low.

However, there was still a chance that it would happen.

......

I was curious as well. So when I asked him, he said he wanted to be repaired.

He said his feelings for Riica would live on forever.

It is precisely as he says. As long as the data is not deleted from our memory banks, we will never forget.

......

I understand, Riica. Then I'll get on with fixing him!

But you really are a dumb robot! Don't you come crying to me with regrets later, you hear me!

...?

......

And with this, he'll be as good as new. Now he's just your everyday all-purpose android.

......

Reboot confirmed. Initiating self-diagnostic program. System all clear.

Thank you very much for finally returning me to my normal operating conditions.

I'm so relieved! BF1=KMN!

You are a Riica model, a civil service droid made by the KMS company, just like me.

It appears data on our activates remain in my memory bank. Evaluating... Data not required. Shall I delete this data from my memory bank?

I told you...this would happen...

What the heck? You said your feelings for Riica would live on forever...

I know why this is happening. Since he returned to his normal operations, his feelings of love was deleted. Even though the memory still lives on...

......

Affirmative. It is standard protocol to delete unnecessary data.

Understood.

But, I will not delete it from my memory. The time we watched the movie together, or the time we floated with the stars.

Riica...

Commencing deletion of memory data.

...... Data Deletion...

System Error.

What?!

Error unknown. The Data has been evaluated as not important...and yet... the data is being protected. Evaluating... Perhaps it is important data?

You bet it is! It's the data that will live forever in both your memory banks!

Aldo. I cannot thank you enough.

Understood. Cancelling deletion of memory data.

Everyone, if you will excuse me.

So he didn't delete his memories of his time with Riica, after all.

......

I guess not. Maybe, just maybe there was a little bit of love left inside him.

Yeah, I think you're probably right.

That would be...nice.

Didn't Professor Madoka mention something about a young girl's memories?

You're quite the romantic, aren't you Sebastia?

Of course I am! I am just a typical, everyday girl, you know!

Hey, Riica.

What is it, Sebastia?

If you ever change your mind on having a boyfriend, just say the word!

What do you mean?

I made a backup of his AI before I repaired him...

So by installing this I can make him fall back in love with you again anytime you want!

What?!

Wh-When did you have time to make a backup?

Please... I'm not stupid enough to let a miracle like that get deleted.

Oh, I'm so looking forward to this! If I analyze this back-up data, I could possibly study love! I just can't wait! Is this feeling...love?

Yeah... That ain't it. I'm not sure I'd call you a typical, everyday girl to begin with...

Please, Sebastia! I have a request. Please install it on all Androids of that type, not just BF1=KMN!

To be popular and adored is the biggest dream a young girl could possibly have!

You don't seem to be in love after all, do you Riica...