The Job of a Professor

Nothing out of the ordinary here either.

Oh, Cerrine. It's you.

Oh, hello, Aldo. Remember: no running in the halls, all right?

That's...an odd thing to bring up.

Oh, wait. I guess you're in teacher mode right now?

Absolutely. So no interfering with my teacherly duties, all right?

Uh, of course. Sure.

Is whatever you're doing now one of those "teacherly duties"?

Yes, standard hall patrol. One of my many responsibilities as a new addition to the school.

Hall patrol? What's the point when you have androids doing that?

The point is to look out for any changes in the academic ambience that only a teacher would notice.

Oh. Such as?

......

Who knows? You'd think I'd know but I really have no clue.

That's not what anyone wants to hear a teacher say!

Well, I'm still new to this. It's only natural that I don't have everything figured out yet.

I get the feeling you could try a little harder, though.

Anyway, that's my rounds here finished. Now, the next place will be...

Kyaaah! Someone, please!

Huh?

Cerrine, that voice...

Yes, it was rather delightful, wasn't it?

...What?!

Ah, the ever-flowing joy and energy of the students never fails to warm my heart.

H-Hold on, that was clearly a cry of distress!

You think so? It didn't sound all that concerned to me.

Whatever it sounds like, it's not something good! You don't need to be a teacher to know that!

Hmmm. Well, if you say so then I suppose I should take a look. For the sake of it, if nothing else.

S-Stop it, please!

Shut it! Now hand 'em over!

*sob* Give them back...

Hah, in your dreams! I'll be selling this for some big cheese.

Was it you who cried out just now, my dear?

Yes, miss.

Whatever is the matter? A lovers' tiff with that gentleman friend of yours, perhaps?

N-No! Nothing's wrong, really.

......

Well then, I'm glad you're all right. Take care, dear.

If that's what you really want.

Hey?! Come on now, Cerrine!

What part of that looked like "nothing" to you?

But the child herself says she's fine. And there was nothing out of the ordinary about what we saw, was there?

Look, I'm sure she's just scared to speak freely to a teacher. Why not ask her directly?

Look, of course I know that little incident wasn't nothing. But I feel the best thing to do is simply to leave it well alone.

But teachers are supposed to try and help students at times like this!

Well, I suppose you have a point there. All right.

My dear, you know it's wrong to lie to your teachers, don't you?

......

*sigh* You leave me no choice. What exactly have you been contriving and scheming in that sweet little head of yours, hm? Out with it, stat!

Ack! What?! I-I, umm...

*giggle* Oh, how I do so enjoy a good forced confession...!

Eek!

Well? Well?!

Cerrine, what are you doing?!

Aldo? Didn't I tell you not to get in the way of my teacherly duties? This would be a great example of that.

Or are you secretly hoping to be taught a lesson too?

That can be arranged. Hee hee hee!

Look, hold on a second! This girl is clearly the victim here! She could be scared or nervous! So, as her teacher, whipping her is exactly what you don't want to do if you're gonna help her!

It is, if I want to get the whole truth and nothing but the truth out of her, Aldo. You know, everyone suddenly can't wait to prove their honesty when faced with my whip.

Look, I'll talk! I'll tell you everything! Just stop whipping me, please!

See?

(Who ever decided it was a good idea to put you in charge of kids, Cerrine?!)

He...He followed me. He'd singled me out, I think. And then he cornered me, the awful brute! He told me to hand over all the cash and valuables I had on my person, like you saw.

All your money and belongings, you say? I see.

"You see?!" That's awful!

You can't just let this lie, Cerrine. You have to find that boy and get this girl's stuff back for her. If this isn't the kind of anomaly you were looking for, what is?

I...suppose this incident certainly is anomalous.

Leave this in my hands, dear. I promise you I shall resolve the matter.

Hah... Really, Miss Cerrine? You won't leave me all alone and helpless like before, huh?

I always endeavor to finish what I start. Besides, tackling this kind of problem is another part of being a teacher, after all.

Then this time... I'll hold you to your promise.

This time? Do you already know this girl, Cerrine?

I...may do. Or I may not.

You don't remember? I guess you do have a lot of students. You can't be expected to remember them all.

Yes, exactly. Anyway, let's get looking for that little ruffian from earlier. He can't be far.

Oh, Professor Cerrine!

Hello there! I heard your last Martial Strategy exam went down quite poorly with the kids. You are aware that combat can't be taught properly in theoretical study alone, aren't you?

Did I really do that terribly? If that's the case why did you make me the substitute examiner?

Oh, well, I simply thought you'd benefit from starting things right at the deep end. Think of it as a favor to you from a more seasoned professional. Haha!

The three students you failed came to me in tears, you know. Saying they'd do anything, even change schools, as long as they didn't have to take your tests anymore.

That bad, huh? Oh, my.

You're from IDA yourself, aren't you, Professor? I'm aware that your aptitude for Martial Theory has been held in high regard since your schooldays. However, the classroom is a different sort of battlefield altogether. It's hubris to assume you can treat it the same way!

Cerrine, what is this guy on about? You aren't just good in theory, you're really strong in a real fight too...

QUIET!

Shut up, Aldo! I said no telling, didn't I? And I'm pretty sure I also said I wanted to lay low and keep my cool when I'm inside the school too. So zip it!

O-Oh, sorry. I wasn't thinking.

Anyway, cut me some slack. It's one thing to blab about that to the kids but if my colleagues find out there'll be trouble.

R-Right. Got it.

What are you two whispering about?

Oh, nothing.

You're right, I do lack experience in practical application. Perhaps you might be so kind as to walk me through the basics of it?

Ah, a wonderful suggestion! Absolutely. I'll be sure to really put you through your paces!

Thank you. And when you do, I'd prefer if it was just the two of us.

Alone? Together?! That's...well... That's perfect! You'll be trained before you know it, I promise!

Thank you. I do SO look forward to it.

......

By the way, I'm looking for a boy in a scruffy uniform with a no-good air about him. Have you seen him by any chance?

A "no-good" air, eh? Ah yes, I know the ne'er-do-well you must mean. I saw him run off to the Sky Terrace only moments ago.

Thank you. I'm EVER so grateful for the help.

Come now, Aldo. Up to the Sky Terrace.

We've been looking all over for you, my dear.

Huh? Whaddya want, lady?

Only a moment of your time. Now, what's going on with the girl I saw you arguing with earlier?

Whazzat? Kinda hard to hear ya, y'know.

No use feigning ignorance, my dear. Teacher knows all.

Nah, you better get them eyes checked cuz you got the wrong guy. Believe it!

......

What's up, Teach'? You mad, huh? Waaah, I'm sooo sorry!

Aw, look, my eyes're gettin' wet! I swear it's remorse, I ain't laughin'! HAH!

Oh crud, not again!

Kid, you've got to back down, now! It'll be real bad if she loses it. You don't know what you're doing!

And who the heck are you? Mindja own bizniz, doofus!

You don't understand! This won't end well for any of us!

Quiet, Aldo! The boy's right. Stay out of this!

What I love the most about teaching is handling energetic little boys like you. Hee hee...There's no feeling quite like that of the sweat you break working to bring out a student's full potential.

Prepare for your horizons to be broadened mercilessly!

Oh nooo, somebody save me from the scaaary teacher. Wahahahaha!

Engaging self-defense mode!

Whaddya think of my little science project, Teach? Real A+ quality, amirite? Better get them gold stars ready!

W-What's ya deal, lady... How'd ya do that?! Word on the street was yer all talk and no walk when it comes to fightin'!

Is that what you heard, darling child? Well, I hope the shock isn't making you lose your nerve.

You numbskulls... You don't know how bad... Youse'a gonna pay for this...

My, what resilience. And such impressive wit.

You'll make a fine student yet, my dear!

Eek! Damn it, old lady! Keep ya mouth shut... Or else...

Or else y...

Huh?

Wh-Wha...

GAH!

Cerrine! That's enough!

Kid! Speak to me! Are you okay?

If that's what you really want.

I feel like... I feel like a new me!

What?!

*giggle* I think that's enough punishment for now.

Now, come along, child. We're going to go find your friend. I promised her I'd resolve this whole tiresome affair, after all.

Oh, Professor Cerrine!

Here I am, as promised. Now, come here.

Own up to what you've done and apologize for causing everyone so much trouble. And be quick about it!

I...I'm very sorry. What I did was terrible and I am ashamed.

No, not you!

She's the one who needs to apologize.

Say what?! Cerrine, have you lost your mind?

......

Oh, you loose-lipped dummy!

No, I ain't said nothin'! I swear! You gotta believe me!

Hmph. Just as I suspected. Now, a proper apology, please.

Ugh. I'm sorry!

Satisfied? Now run along.

What am I missing here?

That little mugging scene earlier? A complete fabrication. The extorter was the girl and she coerced this poor boy into co-operating with her against his will. Right?

Yes, miss. Recently I'd been involved in some unseemly business to get some bread. She said she'd snitch, if I didn't do as she said.

Well, stop that nonsense now. There's no excuse for you to prioritize money over your education.

But my family...we don't got enough. And it's only my kid brother, my grandma and me. I ain't gotta choice.

Oh, my. That simply won't do. Hold on a moment, my dear.

Hello. Yes, it's me. I need a favor. A small loan, yes. Let's set the payoff period at, let's say 20 years, at the longest. Interest-free? Of course.

Hee hee. Great. You can expect a spectacular thank you gift, trust me. I hope you're looking forward to it.

Now then. In good faith, I have arranged for you a small loan with zero percent interest. You're very lucky, you know.

(Huh?! This can't be true!)

So, you can quit your part time "job" and concentrate on your studies like a good boy. Okay?

Miss Cerrine... Thank...thank you.

I won't stand by and watch any pupil of mine struggle. Think of this as a very special scholarship that you can pay back after graduating.

S-Sure! I promise, I'll pay it all back!

Of course you will. Now, I'd like to ask you why that girl staged this silly performance in the first place.

Err, she talkin' like she's got some weird grudge against ya, Miss. Wanted to fool you with the victim act and make you look stupid for laughs.

......

Cerrine, at what point did you realize this was all fake?

I had an inkling from her initial scream. It didn't feel threatened or urgent. But I knew for sure as soon as I looked into her eyes. There were entirely fearless. I have seen true terror countless times and now I can recognize it instantly. Neither her or him were truly scared.

Uh, countless times?

(Wait, maybe I shouldn't dig too deep into that.)

You know, it's really important for teachers to see past their students' emotional barriers like that. That's the kind of anomaly nobody but a teacher could see. If you can do that then maybe you're not such a bad teacher after all.

Really? Well, I'm glad you think so, at least.