FULL FOOL DAY

Commander.

Do you trust me? I need you to come to these coordinates, no questions asked.

It's an emergency.

Thank you.

Commander! Commander!!

R-Raptures are coming! Help me!

Hurry! Hurry!!

Commander!

Help me!

Well, as you can see, I'm very much a real person!

I'm not Syuen!

Come and help me first, will you?!

The Raptures are rushing in! I need your help!

Eeeep! Here they come!

Phew... that was a close one.

...

Deputy Chief Andersen was telling me,

"Some actual field experience would do all of us good, even operators like you."

"Come up to the surface and eliminate Raptures."

So I armed myself and headed up to the surface to bag myself a Rapture,

but turns out I'm no match for them.

Hence why I had to turn to you for assistance, Commander.

Yes.

I've gotta say though, I think I did pretty well!

I chose a place where only older Rapture models appear.

Well, human weapons wouldn't do me any good in taking down a Rapture, so I had to bring one used by Nikkes.

The recoil is a bit rough, but other than that, I don't think it's too bad.

Sure, knock yourself out.

Um, Commander... is there any reason why you're throwing both your hands in the air?

Huh? No. Why do you ask?

At any rate, I feel like I'm on a roll now! Let's keep it going and wipe out all these pesky Raptures!

This is actually kinda fun.

I usually spend all day cooped up inside the command center, so it feels good to be on the surface getting some fresh air.

I knew there was a reason Deputy Chief Andersen sent me up here.

Oh, and another thing!

Whenever I've got this gun in my hand,

this strange feeling comes rushing over me.

It's hard to describe. It's like I can sense where the enemies are.

!!

Who goes there?!

I told you! I can see where the enemies are.

We might as well take the rest of these Raptures out before going back.

The Deputy Chief would be upset if I came back without taking full advantage of this opportunity to get combat experience.

Tally-ho!

Phew... I think that should do it, don't you?

...

You can be honest with me, Commander. I already figured it out a long time ago.

You and the Deputy Chief planned all of this, didn't you?

A little while ago, I had a counseling session.

I'd been feeling a bit morose for a while.

I wasn't sure if I was contributing anything in our fight to reclaim the surface.

...

Thank you, Commander.

I appreciate all the trouble you went through to prepare this environment and these Raptures for me.

I'm an operator. I know better than anyone how absurd the notion of taking down so many Raptures with such a small firearm is.

Have the Counters been helping me from the sidelines? Or some other Nikkes perhaps?

Regardless, I'm thankful for what you've done. I feel a lot better now.

I'm much more confident in myself and my work.

All of these positive things I'm feeling... I'll try and remember them when I return to work.

Once again, thank you.

Commander! We've got a problem!

There's a fire!

What?! There's a fire?! Where?! How?!

...

...

Neon, didn't we just talk about this?

Huh?

We were both going to lie to the Commander about the Commander's Room being on fire.

Oh, that.

I thought you were just messing with me.

Argh! How are we never on the same wavelength?

Why are you lying anyway?

Because today is April Fool's Day.

!!

Oh boy! That means we can lie all day and not get in trouble!

I mean, you still don't want to tell major lies...

Master! I have something to confess. I don't love firepower!

It's totally useless. The world would be better off without it.

It's garbage!

... Urp... blleeerrrgghhh!

Ew! What's wrong with you?!

She got so carried away with her lies that her body couldn't handle it.

Ugh... I'm sorry... I'll never lie again.

... Ha! That itself was a lie!

I'm actually the first CEO of Elysion!

I'm actually a pop superstar!

I'm...

... er...

Come on! You can say anything, so say it.

What other day will you be able to lie with impunity?

Yeah exactly. Plus, I wanna see what you look like when you lie.

...

I...

I hope that the Commander resigns.

...

...

... I'm sorry.

Lying just isn't your forte.

Yeah, that sounded a bit too real.

... Sorry.

Hmm?

Oh, hey Old-Timer.

*Sob*

It's all over.

The toy store is closing down.

Belorta and I were just organizing a few things.

Yes, I realize there wasn't much forewarning.

Nevertheless, as of today, the toy store is officially closing its doors.

There just aren't enough customers. We aren't making any money.

Guess people just don't feel the need for a toy store.

Yes...

I mean, probably.

... Old-Timer.

Who would joke about a thing like this?

*Sob* That's right.

I know Belorta likes pranks, but joking about something like this would be crossing the line.

...

It is?

I didn't even realize it because of everything that's been going on.

*Sob* If only it were a joke!

!!

Really? Does that mean we can continue running the toy store?

I appreciate your wanting to do that, but it's not necessary.

It's better to leave when the time is right.

...

I know we never had many customers... but I enjoyed being here.

I'm not sure. Belorta, where do we go now?

I don't know.

We'll each have to figure out another way to get by.

You mean separately? But I want to stay with you!

... Belorta.

Can't we try talking to the boss one last time?

Old-Timer wants to help us and... we can tell the boss that we'll try to do better this time!

If not that, then...

I've got some money saved up on this.

Do you think it'd be enough for us to buy the store ourselves?

All I know is that I don't want to get rid of the store.

We'd be giving up all the precious memories we've had here...

... Mica.

We'll see. Let me hold onto the credit card.

Ah, I nearly forgot.

While you're here, could you help me think of what to write for our closure notice?

It's my first time dealing with something like this, so I'm not sure how to word it.

We don't want people coming here not knowing that the store is closed.

We have to let them know so that they don't waste their time.

Hmm... that's pretty good.

I'll go with something like that.

Thank you, Old-Timer.

Today... is...

??

Hahaha!

Happy April Fool's Day! I got you both!

Wh-what? Does that mean the toy store isn't closing down?

Nope! I made all that stuff up.

Argh! That's going too far!

You're not mad, are you?

Here's your credit card back, by the way.

You're not upset too, are you Old-Timer?

Haha, you should see yourself, Old-Timer! You're as red as a tomato.

Don't worry, the toy store isn't going anywhere anytime soon.

Ahhh, pulling one over on you two really made my day.

Oh, you think so? We'll just have to wait and see next year.

You're the worst...

Hehehe!

Welcome, Partner.

Oh, hey Pal.

What brings you here?

Mmm.

Acquisition.

Yep. Just like Frima said, we acquired the Maid Cafe.

Why not? If your flagship store is doing well, it's only reasonable to expand and create other branches.

Pal.

If you know what's good for you, you'll stop talking.

Scared?

Wait,

are we supposed to dress up like maids?

Won't do.

What she said.

That's a majority vote. We'll just have to depend on our high-quality drinks to bring in customers.

What about it?

What kind of food do we have to cook?

Can either of you make those?

Nope.

Me neither.

Well, since none of us can cook, we'll scrap the food options.

The Maid Cafe isn't that much different from a regular cafe, anyhow.

What?

You're telling me they talk a specific way here?

Okay, how do they do it then?

I'm sure I can at least pull that off.

... Good lord.

Can't do.

What kind of deal?

You're really making me work for it, aren't you?

Hello, Master! Welcome to the Maid Cafe!

...

...

Frima, you actually...

Just for a bit of bread...?

Money. Hand it over.

Okay, looks like Frima will be in charge of greeting the customers.

No pay, no line.

Like what?

...

...

Good grief. This is a bit much...

By the magic invested in me, I command you to be delicious! Alakazam ★

...

...

Too late.

Argh!

Why are there so many things to do in this place?!

I knew the Maid Cafe was a bad idea from the start.

We should have just taken over the toy store. You can spend all day there and not have to do a thing.

I didn't realize there was so much work involved in running this place.

Doo doo doo♬

Doo-eh? Master? Did you bring everyone from Cafe Sweety here for something?

Cocoa and Ade aren't even here yet...

We just came to hang out.

Really...?

How did you get in anyway?

... Boy oh boy, would you look at the time? We'd better go open up the cafe.

Gotta run.

Mistake. Acquisition lie. Bye.

What'd Frima say? Something about an acquisition?

Hehe...

Hehehe...

Hey! You've got some nerve ignoring me!

Oh, well... I guess that makes sense.

Hehe.

I've decided to become a police officer.

That's all you've got to say? A little enthusiasm would be nice.

That's better. I can't blame you for being surprised.

Sometimes I even surprise myself.

A villain can always recognize a fellow villain.

Poli asked me if I could do it.

Duties?

Hmm...

Arresting people!

How would you know? You're not a cop.

Let me show you how it's done.

Commander?

I was making some desserts, but went a little overboard and made too many.

I brought some to share with Poli and Miranda,

but it looks like it's only you and Drake.

In that case, you both can have some!

Nice! I had a hankering for something sweet.

Thanks a bunch.

...!!

That's it!

You're under arrest!

Huh? Me?

That's right! For attempted murder!

Attempted murder?

Huh?!

Hehe, so that's it! You're so funny, Drake.

I'm glad you enjoyed it.

I'll have to make some more and come visit again. Well, bye now!

What the hell are you talking about?! That stuff wasn't even fit for human consumption.

Pssh, you humans are so--

Hello.

I just came in to beat the heat. It's a scorcher out there.

Coach? Why are you here and not Poli and Miranda?

Never mind. It's actually a good thing I ran into you.

There are some supplements I wanted to recommend to you.

It's called Double Winter Blast.

Take one, and it'll cool you down twice as fast.

Take ten, and you'll cool down twenty times as fast!

You're under arrest!

??

I'm booking you for possession of an illegal substance.

But supplements aren't illegal...

... Well either way, I'm taking you in!

Hey!

Phew... that's a relief. For a moment I thought you were arresting me for real. I even started working up a sweat.

I better go somewhere else.

Tsk.

You could never be a cop. You're too soft.

Hey Commander. Hey Drake.

What are you two doing here?

That's right! I better go and patrol the area. See you around.

Arrest? Patrol? What is going on?

*Sniff sniff* I smell something funny going on.

Hey, Rookie.

You're here awfully early, aren't you?

I appreciate your enthusiasm,

but I'm not done setting everything up. I want the mood to be just right.

You're simply adorable when you look confused.

What woman could resist that face?

Anyway, you should wash up first.

My apologies, but it seems you're in the wrong room.

Allow me to show you to your proper room.

Yan, you should know better than to intervene.

I arranged plans with Client first.

It doesn't seem to me like Rookie knows what you're talking about.

Just hold your horses.

Let me do it first, and then...

No.

We will proceed in the proper order.

Relax. It's not like I'm gonna wear Rookie out.

Don't be such a stickler.

Client.

Allow me to show you to my room.

The ambiance there is far better than it is here.

I have various...

Sweetie!

I was waiting for you.

Then I had a feeling Yan and Dolla were up to something, so I came running.

Turns out I was right!

Do you have any idea how much planning I did so that we could spend some quality time together?

You wanna know how much I spent on this hotel alone?

50,000 credits!

Please, that's chump change.

I spent 100,000 credits.

So, if you don't mind, could you two kindly beat it?

This is my room! If anyone should leave, it's you two.

No!

Sweetie is coming with me!

This isn't going to work. Let's all do it together.

Together? Hmm. That's not a bad idea.

Sure, I'm okay with that.

But it's my first time doing it with multiple people...

What's that look on your face? Are you not interested?

Go take a shower first, then come back.

Of course. Do I look like the type to play around?

What are you doing? Don't you want to clean yourself up first?

What do you mean? You'll be treated to room service, what else?

We were thinking about acquiring a hotel, and we bet each other who could provide the best room service.

You're gonna be the judge.

Wait... you didn't think we had something else in mind, did you?

Go on, Newbie. What exactly did you think we were going to do with you?

Nothing too obscene, I hope.

Liar. I know that's what you were thinking.

Ah, that it is. I forgot about that.

Would you like me to walk you home?

Ah, there you are.

I waited for you so long, I figured I might as well freshen up in the meantime.

You seem like you've had a long day.

Well, that's all part of life.

Once in a while, you have those days, good and bad, that just don't feel real.

Don't let yourself get too stressed about it.

The important thing is to keep a cool head.

Days like the one you're having don't go on forever. It's just one out of many others.

So keep what's good and throw away the bad.

I know you will do well. I have faith in you.

Anyway, I better get going.

I have a meeting in the Ark in 5 minutes.

I can see now that perhaps it wasn't the smartest idea.

Well, I hope what's left of it goes well for you.

(Scoot over. It's too tight.)

(Just squeeze in.)

(... Is this really necessary?)

(Think about it.)

(When the Commander wakes up tomorrow, we'll all be in the same bed.)

(Just imagine what a shock it'll be!)

(Then we can say,)

(Commander, you were amazing last night. How can you do it for so long?)

(...)

(...)

(Haha! This is gonna be so fun!)

(Shh! Master will wake up!)

Commander, are you asleep?

!!

!!

I think Master's asleep. At least I'm pretty sure.

Pretty sure?

Let me check the vitals...

No! Don't.

Let's just get to sleep already.

Sleep tight, Commander. See you in the morning.

You had a rough day, Master.

... Good night.