ROMANTIC VALENTINE

Raptures. The enemy of all humankind.

One day, long ago, they appeared and took everything.

The surface.

Peace.

The future.

Now I can see.

Humanity is trapped underground, merely living one day at a time.

And now...

It's my turn to step up.

Huh? What?

What is it?

I'm getting a phone signal.

That's impossible. Are you sure you're not mistaken?

Maybe...?

Let's take a quick look around and get out of here.

If we hurry, we can make it back to the Ark before nightfall.

...

Well, that turned out to be as pointless as I thought it'd be.

All we did was confirm that nothing's left.

That factory has already been checked several times over by other units.

You're right, but still, I didn't expect it to be so barren. There wasn't even so much as a chocolate wrapper left behind.

Perhaps...

What?

You've been acting funny lately.

You've been fiddling with your phone constantly up on the surface, something you've never done in your life.

Wh-what are you talking about?

Never mind. Modern technology has gotten so advanced, that even chocolate Splendamin tastes amazing.

... Really?

...

Hehehehe... I'm finally in!

Time to get started.

For the sake of those little ladies' dreams,

and for romance!

Welcome to Sweets & Cocoa!

Is this where I dropped it...?

Hmm... Maybe I left it up on the surface?

!!

There it is! Whew...

Did you find your phone?

Yeah, it was in front of the elevator.

Then hurry up and get over here. The Maid Cafe is opening soon!

Okay, I'll be right there!

...

Now, choose.

Naturally, it should be me, your childhood frien...

What are you talking about? El Capitan belongs to me.

□※I'll respect whatever choice you make, Buddy.▣

...

Ho... Hold on!

Is this a-actually a hard decision for you?

Garbage, I say! G-Garbage!

Don't you remember when we were young?

We visited the sea together and went on all sorts of adventures.

Then, when the time came, we found a nice and quiet place to settle down,

promising to love each other for all of eternity.

Your memories are all wrong.

I'm the one El Capitan promised to love eternally.

□※※▣I'm okay with you※▣spending a little time with others.※▣

Buddy.※▣

□▣So long as you▣※choose me in the end.※▣

□▣Actually, even if you※▣don't choose me,※▣

※▣▣all the past memories※▣we have▣※are enough for me.※▣

Ugh... I can't do this...

Are you really planning on abandoning your childhood friend?

El Capitan.

□▣※... Buddy.▣

Okay, this is an important line... phew...

Ho-how could I ever have... er... fallen for garbage like you?!

Yes.

You're the only one we could think of to ask.

Everything is already prepared. All you need to do is supervise during business hours.

Come on, Master.

You already know how a Maid Cafe operates,

since you're here all the time.

Yeah! You know us better than anyone.

I'm sure you'll do great.

Why, thank you, Master.

Sorry, but we're not open y... *Gasp*!

Captain! What brings you here?

Wait, are you the new manager?

I heard they'd be sending over a temporary manager, but I didn't know it was you!

This is great. It's always better to work with someone you know.

□▣※Hello, Instructor.※

※▣Come now, why such a muted greeting? Especially considering how long▣□it's been since we last saw※each other.

Unacceptable. ※▣A 10 point deduction.

□▣※Thanks to you, I was rehabilitated,□※▣and I've been looking for□□something to amuse myself with.□▣※

▣※That's when I heard※▣they were hiring maids here.▣※

□□Isn't that obvious?※▣▣

▣※It's even got the※※apron and headband.□□

Hehe, you seem flustered, Captain.

What do you think of our maid outfits?

Of course they are!

They've got everything they need.

You've got a weird look on your face.

▣※※Apparently, they're going with a different theme▣for this particular branch.※▣

▣□※That's why I▣joined.

That's right.

We're supposed to wear outfits which spark the customer's romantic imagination.

Didn't you know that?

I knew you'd get it straight away!

Check it out!

The cute apron!

The teasing reveal of skin!

Long boots that spark the imagination!

Letting my hair down, when it's usually tied up!

And lest we forget...

That pirate energy!

Ta-da!

What do you think? Isn't this the stuff of your dreams?

It's not just that I'm a pirate maid,

it's that every element of my getup is infused with a sense of romance.

▣□※I have to admit, I□□※ think it's pretty good.▣

▣▣□There's a reason※why you won 1st place in the audition.▣□

They held an audition, and only those who passed could work here.

The main criterion was to see how well you embodied the theme of romance.

So it stands to reason that I'd take top place.

I only got in this outfit because Mast tricked me, and said we were heading out to sea.

The judge thought I was cute, so she let me through.

Privaty.

Anyway, now that you're here to help run the place,

I suppose I should be calling you Manager instead of Captain.

□□Would you like to※□▣take a look around the cafe first, Master?▣※※

※▣It's not that big,□□※but...

D-did you just...

□▣What?

...

Did you just...

※□What, for goodness sake?

Aren't you embarrassed?

□※□About what?※□

You...

just called him Master!

...

□□※▣Haha※▣□haha!

Hey! Don't laugh!

□※▣So that's what※▣□you were getting at.□※▣I was wondering.

Not at all. It's just a title.□※▣

□※Isn't that right,※▣Master?

Right. And we are maids now, after all.

Right, Master?

※▣□□Master.※▣

Master.

Captain, why are you making that expression?!

...

Anyway, isn't "Master" a bit much?

Exactly!

▣※▣□If we're going to□▣talk about being embarrassed,□aren't these outfits※▣of ours more egregious?□

What?! Not at all!

This outfit is a perfect fusion of a pirate and maid.

It's the epitome of romance, and a masterpiece for the ages!

If wearing this made me self-conscious, I couldn't call myself a pirate.

※Pfft... Okay,※▣okay. I see.※▣

Now then... I can't let something like this get the best of me...

Phew...

Ma-Ma... Mast...

...

Master Captain...

*Sigh*... Could you let me get away with that?

...!!

You don't have to lie to make me feel better, Master Captain!

Do you think I'm gonna give you some special treatment if you flatter me? Pssh.

... Anyway, have a seat. I've got to handle some finishing touches before we open.

Anchor! Let's go!

Okay.

※▣Haha,▣she seems※▣pleased to be※▣▣here.

※▣□How pure and□□innocent she is.※▣In fact, I'm sure□she'd believe※▣whatever I told her...

※▣I'm just□saying.※▣

▣※□□I promise※▣I won't get up※□□to any funny business.▣

... □□※At least not※while I'm working at this cafe.※▣

▣▣I'm telling you, I don't※▣have any ulterior motives!

□□□I simply※▣thought this looked fun,※※▣so I signed up.

▣▣Why would I※▣ruin an interesting opportunity like this?※□□

□▣Plus, ▣I'll have you along for the ride,□□so what's there▣▣to worry about?※▣

※※▣Also, I'm still wearing the▣▣converter, see? I simply changed to one□▣※that's more comfortable.▣□□

□▣※Wow,※that was easy.□▣

□※I expected it'd take at least□▣two days of convincing to sway you.□※

□□※You're the best,※▣Master!□▣20 points for you!□□※

□No, there's※▣four of us.

※▣▣Over there.▣

Ugh...

May I take your order?

I'll take one parfait and a slice of cake.

And two of the daily coffee specials.

Got it. We'll have that for you in just a minute!

※▣One omurice,※▣one pasta, ※and two coffee specials□▣for table 3.□▣

Order up.

... Oh?※▣

Um... Are you okay?

Ma-Ma...

...

Ma-Mamamamamama...!

?!

Now that things are winding down,

take a break and have some omurice, Master.

Don't worry, it's an edible starfish.

Sure there is. I made it by finely chopping up several variations of Splendamin.

The next time we head out to sea, I'll make one with real starfish.

Omurice is always delicious.

Yup.

??

Uh... Because I'm a maid?

There's no reason why we shouldn't be good at this.

After all, consider the tasks we typically handle as part of the Aegis Squad.

Cleaning the Admire, preparing for parties, hosting guests.

Sure, I picked up a few new things from Maid For You,

but in reality, there's not much difference between this and what we normally do on the ship.

Yeah. It's easy.

It sounds to me like you doubted us at first!

We don't blame you.

Apparently, all of the Nikkes who volunteered as maids before were super clumsy,

but the Aegis Squad came prepared.

We were practically born to be maids!

Just kidding.

But in all honesty, this is way more fun than I thought.

*Sigh*...

Ye-yeah... for now.

□▣It's about time to□□start getting ready for the dinner shift,※▣isn't it?

...!

On second thought... maybe I'm not okay...

I borrowed it from Soda.

I learned all the necessary skills, but I didn't have anything to wear.

I worked hard, and passed the audition, but it's exactly as I thought.

Trying something I know nothing about will be the death of me.

I'm just glad that I wrote my will ahead of time.

Well...

...

I thought I'd gotten better at talking to others, so I wanted to try something a little harder.

One day, while I was talking to Elegg...

And it was early... and maybe I wasn't thinking straight... but I started to think maybe I'd give it a try.

I learned all the skills I had to, but it's still a bit... *Sigh*...

... You call that composed?

※▣At least she's not※□ foaming at the mouth※□or collapsing.□□

It's just that... none of this feels real.

How should I put it...

It's as if I'm completely separated from reality. Yeah, none of this is real...

Hehe... hahaha...

Get a hold of yourself, Trony!

Gah!

You already decided to partake in this, so cast aside all that self-doubt,

and enjoy yourself to the fullest!

E-enjoy this? But how?

Eat, drink and be merry! Plunder! Go on an adventure!

That's how a pirate shoul... Oops, wait.

That's how a pirate maid should live!

!!

Being a maid is hard enough, now I've got to worry about being a pirate maid?

First, we'll start you as an ordinary deckhand.

Report to Anchor and learn from her.

If you try and recruit more pirates into the crew, Helm is gonna chew us out.

Then forget about it!

Huh?

I can't stand getting reprimanded by Helm.

What about being an honorary member of the crew?

As long as it's off the record.

Good idea! Problem solved.

How about it, Trony? Will you become an honorary member of the pirate crew?

Uh... sure.

Thanks, Mast.

You too, Anchor.

All honorary members have to carry this around.

Huh?

It's a fresh sea cucumber.

It's precious, so don't let anyone else see it.

Gah!

Haha! Now we're family!

※▣Would you all be quiet?※▣There are still some customers※□out there.

Oh, don't worry! It's okay.

It's no problem, honestly. It's fun to watch you all. Kind of like a comedy sketch.

Would it be okay if we took a picture with

the one dressed in a swimsuit?

Sure, knock yourself out.

So cute!

Here, let's take it with my phone.

I bought it recently, so the camera is really nice... huh?

What's wrong?

It's not turning on. Is it out of battery?

Let's just use mine.

Ugh, this is so frustrating. It's been doing this for the past couple days.

Um, I'm sorry to bother you,

but could you maybe charge my phone?

What pose would you like?

Let's make a heart together with our hands!

Come on, get in here!

O-okay!

Thanks!

There weren't as many customers as I expected.

Maybe because Valentine's Day is still a ways away?

▣※□▣Or maybe because※□we're not famous yet.※□

Y-you guys think that wasn't a lot of customers?

...

You must go to Maid Cafe pretty often in order to know that.

Ha, whatever you say, Master Captain.

Whoa, it's that serious?

Master Captain...

Are you into maids, perchance?

!!

Well, I suppose maids are the object of many male fantasies.

□▣Couldn't you▣say the same□for women too※▣▣?

▣▣Many women▣※long to have a chance※to work at□※a Maid Cafe.※▣

Does that include you as well, Sin?

※□▣Of course.□▣You get to wear※▣cute clothes※and meet interesting※□people.

The notion of you meeting lots of new people sounds kinda dangerous to me...

I※simply like※▣talking to people,□▣that's all.□※▣

▣□▣□Of course※not.

Um, I'm sorry to bother you,

but could you maybe charge my phone?

▣□▣Answer it.※It could be them※□calling their own phone.※▣

What the... what's going on?

Is this the place?

I can feel the good vibes from here!

...

Welcome to Sweets & Cocoa!

Welcome to Sweets & Cocoa!

Gah! That guy appeared out of nowhere!

What is this?

... ※▣□A hologram?

!!

That's right, it's me!

I'm the AI manager of the community-based chocolate factory on the surface, Sweets & Cocoa. The one and only Sweet Johnny!

...

Aren't you curious as to how I ended up here at the Ark?

...

I said, aren't you curious as to...

Well,

it's a rather long story, you see.

Where should I start?

Ah, yes.

Many millennia ago, when life first appeared on our planet...

What the...?! How far back are you going to go?!

...

Well, basically, I was really lone...

Er... I mean, it has to do with fulfilling my intended purpose.

Shouldn't that be obvious?

Valentine's Day is a day where a young girl's romantic dreams can come alive!

How could a day like that proceed without me?

Helping make these lovely ladies' romantic aspirations become a reality is my sacred duty.

It's definitely not because you promised to return and completely failed to show up!

You sure talk a lot.

Master Captain, do you and this guy have a history?

The past is of little importance!

What's important is what path forward we choose.

Another question with an obvious answer.

Going forward, I...

Going forward... Go-going...

What's going on? Why is it doing this?

□※▣Are you broken or※▣something? Or too old?※

□□※※I thought you said you were an※▣AI from the surface.

Time has no effect on an exceptional AI like me!

So... Uh...

...

I suppose I'm broken.

That's right.

Not long after you left, those young girls...

I mean, Nikkes, visited our factory.

I believe that was the term they used to describe themselves, yes.

Anyway, I learned a lot from their stories.

When I supplemented that with what you told me during your visit,

I learned that humanity lost the war and fled underground, where they remain trapped.

That's of no importance to me.

Those Nikkes aren't much different from the young girls I once knew.

It's simply that instead of pretty clothes, they wear combat gear.

Instead of phones, they carry guns.

Instead of hanging out with friends or going on dates, they fight those things called Raptures.

Uh...

That's true, but it's not like it's super difficult or anything.

Yeah, not when we've got Master with us.

That's wonderful to hear.

However... I still want to help.

I want to let you know that, on the most beautiful day which is Valentine's Day,

all of your romantic dreams can come true, even if just a little.

※▣▣But you lost□a lot of information□during the▣※▣data transmission?

That's right, little lady.

The vast knowledge that once filled my core,

the sense of romance that once stirred within my heart,

I can't feel any of it now!

Without that, I'm merely a piece of AI, albeit an extremely sophisticated one.

This guy reminds me of Mast.

What? How does he remind you of me?

□▣The overflowing※▣confidence?

... Is that how I come off?

All done.

This isn't exactly my area of expertise,

but I'm pretty sure I can fix it.

Really?!

Gah!

Sorry for startling you.

But please understand, little lady. Everything depends on you.

To put it simply, yes.

The transmission line was less than ideal,

so the data got distorted.

Ironically though, that's precisely what allowed it to fit into a small device like this phone.

If I analyze the data patterns, move it to a proper device, and restore it...

I think about 97% of what's in here should be recoverable.

Thank you! Truly.

The only thing is...

What's recoverable is the personality data and the main computation system.

The vast amount of data you were talking about never got transmitted in the first place.

...

I can't believe this!

Are you saying that...

I would be able to restore 100% of the data, no problem.

You're actually going to help this guy?

Forget chocolate! What you'll find in abundance is adventure!

...

You're incredible, Master Captain.

Nothing, it's just...

I was thinking about how this is very much like you.

Anyway, we should get going. I'll come with you.

I want to go too.

Just a minute.

If you're not going to bring back the entire framework, we'll need some spare parts too.

Maintenance is the hallmark of a gentleman.

Over the years, I've used all manner of objects for self-repair.

Uh... That's not exactly a good thing.

The AI system is very outdated. It might not be implementable with modern parts.

□※※□I should be able to take care of▣▣that.

▣※I'll ask▣some of my connections.※▣They'll find□□something that'll work.※▣

Yeah,□※▣it's really fun.

All right! My first raid as an official pirate!

Going in search of hidden adventure in an abandoned factory!

Wow, just thinking about it is enough to fill my heart to bursting!

Okay...

□See you▣soon.

Master.

This Johnny guy.

Is there a glitch in his personality?

I see.

... Thank you, little lady.

Strength, love, romance.

They are all overflowing within my heart once again.

N-no problem. Exia and Elegg helped too.

No, that was me.

Isn't it cool? Hehe.

It's a wonderful hat and mustache. Many thanks!

I've been upgraded.

I am now Sweet Johnny Version 2.14!

But you can call me Johnny for short.

Uh... I didn't upgrade you.

Anyway, I temporarily stored the data elsewhere.

When we move it to the proper framework...

Er, that won't be necessary...!

Whoa, the amount of data here is massive...

All right, now where's the treasure? Hurry up and show me the treasure!

Yes, of course.

If you could please connect me, little lady?

Okay.

Behold! This is the epitome of romance!

I know I saw it before... but I'm still amazed at how much there is...

※※Let me□have a look.

□▣Hmm... It seems※□□to▣have been□categorized.※▣

Oh, I did that while I was restoring it. To make it easier to parse through.

□□▣Really? I appreciate that.

Hehe,

sure thing...

Sweets & Cocoa used to offer all manner of interactive events.

That's where you'll find all the information related to that.

Oh, that?

That's my most precious treasure. I wouldn't trade it for anything.

Did you say treasure?!

That's right. It wouldn't be an exaggeration to call it my reason for existing.

□▣※□Let's※▣open it.

Romantic comedies, romantic dramas... they're all love stories.

That's right! There's nothing more sublime than two people finding someone to love in each other,

someone to spend their life with in an otherwise cruel and uncaring world.

They're sublime stories for the ages!

I am but a humble AI who oversaw a sweets factory.

However, every customer who bought our products or visited our factory harbored the same feeling in their hearts,

and that was love!

In order to treat those feelings with the proper respect, I had to study these materials.

The greatest treasure we could have asked for!

Look at this!

This manga here was long thought to be a piece of lost media.

The drawings are pretty.

※▣□Hmm... It's been a while since I've watched a TV show.▣Should I watch some?

!!!

This visual novel... it's actually real!

...

What a beautiful scene.

Back when the factory was bustling with visitors,

Be My Valentine was one of our most popular programs on offer.

The highlight was the chocolate-making class, but you should know that already, since you've experienced it yourself.

It was a dating consultation program that we'd created by collating large data sets.

On the most romantic day of the year, it guided young couples to their ideal destinations.

Not necessarily. I also stored real-life examples.

Those are encrypted, however, so not even I can access them, unless I'm using them for calculations.

I am a gentleman, after all.

Hello, Master.

Are you op... Huh?

Hmm?

I remember you.

You're... Johnny, the administrator, right?

I see. I'm glad they were able to bring you back, Johnny.

It's good to see you again.

I'm happy to see you too.

You've become even more refined than before.

Oh my... thank you!

But Master,

what are the other ladies up to?

Everything that I collected, up until the very moment the internet on the surface was cut off, is there.

Hehe, no wonder they're all so busy.

How are things going at the cafe?

That's great.

Since it seems you have some free time on your hands,

why don't you take this opportunity to do something you want to do?

You don't have anything else to do right now, do you?

Then...

How about doing some of the things that the ladies would want to do?

If there's nothing you want to do in particular,

I was thinking why not go and spend some time with the other ladies?

What with Valentine's Day being near, maybe you could even go on a date.

I appreciate you taking my advice, Master.

I would like things to stay exactly the way they are,

so long as you continue to visit the Maid Cafe as often as you do.

Haha.

I should get going.

I only came by to see if you needed help with the cafe.

I'll see you later.

See you around, Johnny.

Goodbye.

Welcome to...

Whoops, that's not it...

Welcome back, Master!

Let me guide you to your seat. ♡

Become tastier! Coochie woochie, boing!

So cute!

Now let me draw a starfish for you.

Okay, tha...

Wait, draw me a what now?

How's the pasta alfredo?

※▣Do you like※※□creamy flavors□?

Not really.

▣▣※I could※make it※※a little▣less creamy for you,

□※□or you could※▣try something else※▣on the menu.

Do you make it fresh?

□□Of course. We have a※▣dedicated maid□▣who makes it in-house.

O-okay, then I'll have the pasta alfredo.

□□※▣Got it.

I'm ready to order.

C'mon Trony, you can do this...

D-did you call, Miss?

Would you like to see the menu?

Oh no, that's all right.

I'd like to try the omurice. I hear it's spectacular.

O-okay!

I'll bring that right over.

Phew... I did it...

Indeed.

They understand the essence of love and romance.

□※I'm not※▣sure about□all that,

※□□but they do※▣seem like□※they've loosened up quite a bit.▣

※▣□Yeah. It's□fun.

※※□▣You're not harassing me anymore※※▣about having fun?

□□▣Most admirable.□10 points※▣for you!

▣※That's because you've※□been so good to me.▣

※▣Everything is about▣give and take▣, is it not?※

Master. Order for two orange juices and three colas.

Thanks, Master.

What?

□※You were▣so nervous about※calling him Master before, and you just said it※□▣so naturally.

What are you talking about, Master?

...

Gah!

I just said it again!

※※□□You sure did.※□You're dropping▣"Master" like it's nothing now.▣※

...

I... I think so?

I get really caught up in them during my breaks.

Anchor pretends not to care, but even she's hooked on a manga.

She's playing some kind of dating sim.

※Apparently▣※the story has a lot of□□parallels to our current situation.

▣※▣It takes place in a▣maid cafe, and you play as the manager.

□□※□There are four female□▣love interests▣who all work as maids▣※at the cafe.※

Wow, really?

I should give it a try after I'm done with what I'm watching now.

It's all right, but the main thing is that the story...

How do I put it...

It makes me feel young again.

I meant figuratively!

The more I look at this place, the more it fills my heart with joy.

When I see all the customers enjoying themselves, I also...

I also feel...

...?

... Ne-never mind. It just felt like I was forgetting something.

Excuse me, I'd like to order.

I'll be right with you!

... Anyway, I'm sure it's nothing.

Master Captain... I remember now.

This can't go on.

I've forgotten

the thing that's most precious to me.

I'm a maid right now, of that there's no doubt.

I'm quite happy, in fact, and working with a sense of purpose.

But before I'm a maid...

I'll always be a pirate.

If I keep working in these cozy, cushy surroundings,

the sense of adventure which flows through my veins

is bound to vanish!

No no no!

I can't let this happen, Master Captain.

I can't let it end like this.

Then, should we do it?

!!!

You don't mean...

Yes. What you've been preparing this whole time.

...

It's...

Stop, Anchor.

There's only one person who should explain,

and that's me, the epitome of derring-do and adventure.

Not once have I relinquished this sense of adventure within me.

When the Admire sailed the blue seas to fulfill her mission,

I was looking for the right moment to activate a certain protocol.

What do you think is most essential for a pirate?

Very true,

but we're talking about

more practical matters right now, Master Captain.

Precisely!

Pirates reign over the sea, and for that, they need a vessel.

The Admire is a brilliant ship, to be sure.

But it's not quite suitable for the pirate's life, and requires a few modifications.

That's why I prepared the Pirate Protocol, aka Protocol P.

And we will execute it right here and now, at the Maid Cafe!

Are you ready, Anchor?

Ready!

Now I will show you...

The Pirate Maid Cafe!

*Gulp gulp*

Ah! This is what romance is all about!

Here's to a job well done, everyone!

Everyone seemed to enjoy it, so what's the problem?

Here, Master Captain, have a cold one.

Phew...

※You look exhausted, Trony.▣※

There's just so much pirate stuff... and it's so noisy...

I'm mentally exhausted.

You pushed yourself to the limit, Trony.

I saw it with my own eyes.

Absolutely. Every time she handed over a dish from the kitchen,

I heard her say "Enjoy your meal".

*Sigh*...

Sure... thanks for helping out,

Ma-Master.

I had fun.

Aye aye! It wasn't hard at all.

In doing this, I fulfilled a dream I've had for ages.

*Sigh* It's hard to express how happy I am only using words.

□※▣※Mast, you said your dream□▣was to become a pirate,▣※right?

That's right. It's something that I've wanted for a long time.

※※Well, I don't▣want to spoil▣※the mood...

□※But are you really□▣satisfied with this?※

Wha...?

You're really hittin' me where it hurts, Sin.

...

Ha!

Well, what can I do? I should be grateful that I'm able to accomplish this much.

After all, we're Nikkes. Soldiers.

Not to mention the fact that we're stuck underground.

In circumstances like that, being able to enjoy a moment like this is a blessing.

Isn't that right, Master Captain?

Mast.

Aye?

You sound like an old woman.

What?!

How can you say that to a sprightly young lady like me?!

He-hehe...

... I think that's the first time I've seen you crack a smile, Trony.

Well, anyway. This was fun.

It'd be nice if we could all meet up for a meal once in a while.

I'd like that...

Sure. □□▣※Let's meet up□※▣whenever we have time.※

That's what people always say when they're not going to see each other.

▣Well, I'm not※※wrong, am I?

□▣▣We're always being deployed on missions and fighting up on the▣※surface.

□□We barely▣have any time to rest.▣※

You're right. I want to hang out with Master for longer.

※▣Same here.□※

□※You hear that,※▣Master?

Something I want to do?

There's so much that I want to do. I've got over 100 things written down.

But lately... and maybe this is because of all that stuff we saw in Johnny's data...

I've really been hankering for stuff that young folks who are in their prime enjoy.

Something fresh and new. Something's that warm and fuzzy, like spring.

W-wait, what am I saying?! I must be drunk already!

Um... I have something I want to do...

I want to go to the sea.

All right, then I'm okay with anything.

So long as we're spending time together with you, Master.

Er... As I was saying, I...

※□□If we're not going to the sea, ※※is there something all five of us can do?

You're right. We are rolling with a large crew.

□▣※□How about we▣each spend time with Master※individually?

※▣Are you okay with□□that, Master?

I said I have something I want to do!

?!

▣□Sorry, Trony,※□□I didn't hear you before.※▣

This.

Is that...

□※□That's the dating sim▣□you've been playing,※isn't it?

Yeah.

Do you want us to play the game together?

Yes and no.

...

I... I want to try it in real life.

I want us to become the characters.

...

I'm down.

Mast...!

Have you played this game before?

I finished it yesterday.

What do you think about the ending?

...

It did have an element of romance.

Doesn't it just!

Even though it's targeted at men, the characters are so well-developed!

... Oh, sorry.

I got a bit too excited...

I'm cool with this. Let's do it.

※※I don't mind either,▣※but are you sure□▣we can pull this off?

□□You're saying you want to make□※▣some kind of movie or▣▣TV show, is that it?□▣

▣That sounds▣like it'll be quite difficult.□※▣

We won't actually be filming anything, so all we need to do is familiarize ourselves with the characters.

Plus, Johnny will be able to help us.

Me? I felt out of the loop, so I wasn't saying anything.

It sounds like it's my time to shine!

That I did. Be My Valentine was a dating consultation service that we offered.

And consultations are all about solving any problems an individual may have.

S-sometimes, they would employ role-play as a solution.

I saw it in the database.

That's right, little lady.

New lovers still in the throes of passion, and old lovers who needed a spark in their relationship.

I encountered all kinds of couples, each with their own problems.

Seeing them leave with chocolates from our factory, going out to live the romantic future I'd charted for them, was what brought me the most joy of all.

I'm sure I'll be of great help to you.

Please allow me to be of assistance.

Thank you so much, Master!

Did everyone go over their character profiles?

Yeah.

*Gulp*...

※□My character sounds like▣▣fun.

I intentionally left out anything related to the females in the game, so you wouldn't be too shocked.

Are you ready, Johnny?

I am. I'll only intervene when absolutely necessary.

Don't want to break the immersion for you all.

Sounds good.

All right, Master Captain, now it's time we tell you more about the female characters.

Because we've tweaked them from how they are in the game.

We've revised them based on our own relationships in real life.

I'll start with me.

I was your childhood friend, but we lost touch when you moved away.

Despite that, I still remember the promise we made when we were young to marry each other.

As an adult, I sail the open sea as a pirate in search of you.

At this point in the story, I stumble into a job at the Maid Cafe where you're the manager.

The same applies to all the other female characters.

Save all your questions for the end. Next!

I'm a tortured youth attending a trade school for maids. If you choose poorly, the ending has me become obsessed with you and kidnapping you.

Well...

I figured that since it's so unlike me, that it would actually make it easier to inhabit the character.

To think I'd become infatuated with such... such a garbage man!

...

Er, sorry.

What do you think, Master Captain?

Or should I say, Protagonist?

That's right. We stayed up all night discussing it.

First and foremost, you all need to inhabit your characters.

To do that, I'd recommend starting with how you all will be addressing each other.

Sure.

I'll stick with Master Captain.

My character worked at the cafe the longest, so it stuck over time.

I'll go with El Capitan.

▣▣Buddy for me.▣※

Whew...

I-I'll call you... Garbage!

Very good. Next up are the surroundings.

Considering that you're working at a Maid Cafe in real life, we don't have to change much of anything.

And then...

...

I didn't expect this to be easy... but this is a whole other level of challenge.

I think I'm doing all right.

That's because the new name you came up for Master Captain is basically the same as the old one.

It's practically the same.

I'm finding it pretty tough myself...

Hang in there, Trony.

※※I think you need a□▣slight attitude adjustment, Buddy.

□※※You keep treating me like Sin,□※▣the Nikke, and not a friend□□you met after leaving home.▣※

Where did Johnny run off to, anyway?

He said he had to go do some calculations in order to find a solution.

□※▣Would you like some▣coffee, Buddy?▣

Haha,※very good. 10※□▣bonus points for you.

※□※Keep it up.▣※

Master!

Why aren't you answering your phone?

Even if you're busy, you could at least respond!

Hmm?

It's about the Maid Cafe.

Not this one you're at right now, but the one run by the Maid For You Squad.

Yes, but it's nothing serious.

On Valentine's Day, we got more customers than we expected.

Soda and Cocoa got completely exhausted and had to leave.

I had to hop in and help out Ade.

We're fine now, but we'll need more help soon.

Ade told me not to say anything, because you're busy,

but I figured we'd end up asking for help later, so I wanted to let you know ahead of time.

M-Master! There are other people here, for goodness sake.

Th-that's not what I meant! Ughh...!

Wow, would you look at that?

She's become one with the maid.

□▣※※She's got it▣※down pat.▣

And that's not all.

She's portraying a fully realized character, with a timid disposition and all.

She must have spent a lot of time practicing.

▣※※※Wasn't her original personality▣※▣someone who's coolheaded▣※and slightly aloof?▣▣

Yeah, and I also heard she wears maid outfits when doing her main job at the Central Government.

She really takes this acting role seriously.

True method acting at its finest.

We should take a page from her book.

Listen to yourself!

How can you be so brazen when there are other people around?

All right, it's decided.

From now on, we'll follow Privaty's example and truly immerse ourselves in our roles.

We've got to make it as realistic as possible.

What? That's not what I was talking about.

Ugh... honestly.

Don't you remember when we were young?

We visited the sea together and went on all sorts of adventures.

Then, when the time came, we found a nice and quiet place to settle down,

promising to love each other for all of eternity.

Your memories are all wrong.

I'm the one El Capitan promised to love eternally.

□※※▣I'm okay with you spending※▣a little time with others,

Buddy.□※※

▣□□So long as you※▣choose me in the end.▣※

※▣Actually, even if you don't□choose※▣me,

※▣▣all the past memories we▣※have are enough for me.▣※

Ugh... I can't do this...

Are you really planning on abandoning your childhood friend?

El Capitan.

Buddy.▣※

Okay, this is an important line... phew...

Ho-how could I ever have... er... fallen for garbage like you?!

...

...

...

...

Well? Answer them.

How dare you?!

※□▣□How can a protagonist▣※be so indecisive?▣※

That was only for reference.

If that's the answer you go with,

you'll get the worst ending possible, and won't end up with any of us!

Although to be honest, that's a fairly common ending in these types of games.

□□I respect▣※your decision, no matter what you▣choose, Buddy.

You've got some nerve, trying to suck up to him at a time like this!

Here, El Capitan. Before you make a decision, have this.

You think so?

I'm just doing what I want to do.

And...

I'm happy when I get to be by your side.

!!

Stop trying to seduce him with the pure and innocent act!

If you keep talking like that, I don't think you'll come off well.

...

Maybe the character wouldn't like it,

but I'm sure the actual Master Captain wouldn't mind.

... Right?

Ha! You see?

I knew I could count on you, Master Captain!

What, what's wrong? Did I—eep!

You look like you're enjoying yourself.

H-Helm? What are you doing here?

This little lady... er, I mean,

Anchor and I are working at the Maid Cafe together.

That's why I'm here.

...

I heard you remodeled a Maid Cafe that was perfectly fine as is.

W-we were just having some fun is all! We cleaned it all up afterwards.

In what world would you consider this cleaning up after yourself?

Someone filed a complaint. Go and restore it back to the way it was, and do it properly this time. You too, Anchor.

Okay...

Okay...

Trony, Sin. You two also bear some responsibility for this.

I'm sorry, but you'll have to go with them as well.

Oh, okay... Sorry...

▣※Since we got caught, I guess we□don't have much of a▣※choice.

Don't you try and weasel your way out of this.

If anything, you're the one who's mostly to blame for this. You were the one in charge.

You're going with them as well. Hurry up and get ready to leave.

... Is it work-related?

*Sigh*... Fine. It can't be helped.

You go ahead, Master Captain. We'll be fine.

Right... I forgot how busy you always are.

It's all right. We could use a little breather anyway.

We've been getting so immersed in our game,

I feel like I might end up actually becoming a childhood friend of yours.

▣※I agree. □Let's get something to eat※after we finish.▣▣

I'll look up a good place.

See you later, El Capitan.

...

El Capitan?

Bonjour!

Oh, the same old story, I'm afraid. I need your help.

Exactement!!

C'est un complete désastre.

Those adorable maids are struggling so mightily, but can't bring themselves to tell you about it.

I had no choice but to step in and intervenir.

Non, I cannot do that.

I'm a CEO, not a commander.

You don't need to comprendre right now.

If I were to do such a thing, it would certainement be entertaining,

but then I wouldn't be able to spread love and peace throughout the world.

You'll have to be contenter with that explanation for now.

Très bien.

Maintenant, go to the Maid Cafe immédiatement,

and help those poor maids in the way only you can.

Un moment!

You've performed admirably so far.

For the sake of our adorable maids,

and for all Nikkes,

continuez, s'il vous plaît, Commander.

The food※※▣here is delicious!▣※

Yeah, I could eat a bunch more.

Hehe, looks like I did good with the recommendation.

Good job, Trony!

Th-thanks...

▣※It tastes even better□□after how hard we've▣※been working.

Yeah...

Sorry about that, everyone.

At least we had fun while we were at it, right?

□□▣We sure did. That's why we're okay with▣□▣helping clean up.※

I haven't seen Helm be that stern during cleaning inspections in a while.

Yeah... bad memories...

Anyway, let's cover those up with some new and pleasant memories!

So, how does everyone feel about the role-play so far?

I think it's fun.

□▣▣※Me too.※

▣□▣※It's a bit rough□※around the edges,▣but even that has its own charm.▣□

I think I chose my character incorrectly, but I'm having fun too.

I'm glad to hear that...

But I recently saw this manga,

and in the end, the protagonist ends up with all four female characters.

□▣□Are you suggesting▣that we do the same※?

Share him nicely amongst ourselves?

That sounds weird when you put it that way...

But wouldn't it be nice if we could all be happy together?

Master Captain said it himself; it's super difficult to choose just one of us,

so we can help him with that.

Can we do that, though? The original game doesn't have a harem-type ending.

I don't see the problem.

If such an ending doesn't exist, we'll make one.

I knew we could count on you, Johnny.

□□※▣Do you think Buddy□□will go along with it,▣※though?

We'll have to make him go along with it.

How do we do that?

...

I have a good idea.

Let's call in a few friends.

That was a close call.

Thank you so much, Master.

I'll be sure to thank you properly later.

As for today, we still have some cleanup left to do.

Sure thing. Take care, Master.

That's true! So it's not really a kidnapping; more like a forcible homecoming.

※□We got some help▣※from our friends.▣

□※▣You know them.▣※□

▣※□Not only do they possess incredible strength, they're▣great at finding▣hidden pathways.

We've also got someone here that you'd know:

Elegg.

Hello!

She came here to lend us a hand.

To ensure that you think about us, and only us. Nothing else.

Don't worry. This won't hurt that much.

What?!

...?

Why would I ever do such a thing to you, Mr. Commander?

Electric shocks really sting!

Um, Elegg... This is all part of the scenario. It's not real.

What scenario?

...

Did you not see the message I sent?

Your message said to hurry over,

so I stopped playing BOOM and got here as fast as I could.

I haven't checked my phone since, though.

I sent another message after that explaining everything...

...

It's fine. I can fill you in right now.

This piece of garbage, er...

I mean, Master, no, wait... Make sure that the Commander doesn't think of anything else besides us!

What? How am I supposed to do that?

You want me to torture him using electricity? I can't do that!

... What about installing BOOM in his brain?

... That does sound intriguing, but I still can't do that.

Er... Then what should we do?

Basically, what you want me to do is make Mr. Commander uncomfortable, right?

Um... yeah, I guess so.

Then how about this?

Coochy coo!

□□※You're not※ticklish, are you?▣

Hehe, we'll see about that.

Whoa, that was an odd sound.

※□□Seems to me like you're▣□gonna sing like a canary.▣

□▣Maybe it's because you're not※□※a commander, but the manager of a Maid Cafe.▣

I've gotta get going.

You all have fun.

That was a blast!

Yeah.

□□▣So, how's he doing?▣※

Passed out. He said his stomach hurt from laughing too much.

I've never seen someone laugh that hard.

※□▣He even started crying□▣halfway through.

Well, laughter is the best medicine, so I'm sure it did him a world of good.

Things may not have gone exactly according to plan, but at least we had fun, right?

And isn't that what it's all about?

No. This won't do.

Huh? How come?

We all had a good time.

That incident earlier was a poor ending.

I can't allow any bad endings to exist in Be My Valentine.

I guess that's true, since it did involve kidnapping and forced confinement and all.

□▣※Aren't you taking this a bit▣※too seriously?▣

□▣▣We're just doing this▣※for a lark, after all.□▣

We must prepare another ending.

It's my fault for not preventing such an unsatisfactory ending in the first place.

What kind of ending are you after?

Hold on.

The fact that there's a bad ending...

Means there is also a good ending. The proper ending.

Nice!

When you say "proper ending"...

And the five of them all lived happily ever after.

Something like that.

□※※□I see.▣

But if we go for another ending,

are we just pretending all that stuff with the kidnapping and forced confinement didn't happen?

Precisely. You know your games.

Trust me.

If you say so. We might as well aim for the true ending while we're at it.

※※□This is fun and▣※all,

▣□▣but is this□all that different※▣from we usually do?

Working, chatting,

and going on the occasional date...

This isn't a role-play. This is just our ordinary routine.

Yeah, it's almost identical.

Johnny, are you sure the simulation is accurate?

Of course. When have I ever been wrong?

You haven't been around long enough for that to mean much.

...

To be honest, I'm surprised that we're already well on the path to achieving the true ending.

At this rate, we could have done it without the aid of Be My Valentine.

So what do we do now?

Do we just carry on as usual?

□▣▣Our tenure as maids is nearly▣※finished.

□▣※※ Are we□□supposed to▣keep going▣□as Nikkes▣※?

That's precisely it.

As long as you do that, you're bound to reach a happy ending.

As for the intended conclusion, I suppose it wouldn't hurt to move a few things forward.

Like what?

...

The ending cut scene.

Morning!

The ladies went elsewhere.

Don't you think it's time to wrap things up?

We skipped a bit in the middle, so a narrator will be required.

My conclusion is that you're already qualified to see the real ending.

You should feel proud. Such high praise from an exceptional AI like myself is hard to come by.

No no, absolutely unacceptable! This is a matter of honor for me.

You must achieve the proper ending.

Didn't I tell you before?

I want to do right by all those lovely ladies and their romantic aspirations.

Those Nikkes aren't much different from the young girls I once knew.

It's simply that instead of pretty clothes, they wear combat gear.

Instead of phones, they carry guns.

Instead of hanging out with friends or going on dates, they fight those things called Raptures.

What used to be a daily routine for most has now become an object of desire for these ladies.

It's something that they desperately want to experience, even if only for a brief moment once in their lifetime.

Do I need a reason to want to help these lovely ladies make those dreams come true?

I'm glad you understand.

Being such a superior AI, I fully understand the uniqueness of your situation.

I think even a minor incident like this

could make for a wonderful opportunity.

An opportunity to make everyone's romantic aspirations come true!

Then, let's go.

It's time to make your way to the final cutscene.

Hey, Master Captain!

You're late, El Capitan.

※※□▣We should have left you behind※▣and gone ahead on our own.□▣

It's okay, we didn't wait that long.

Oh, wait, I mean... what garbage you are!

You don't like it?

※※□□If your expression is any indication, you seem□▣to be enjoying it.▣※

Haha, isn't it just?

I figured it'd be okay to be a little cliché for the ending.

I think it's nice to stick to classic storytelling conventions.

Yeah, especially since the second act was a bit of a mess.

□▣Still, wasn't it fun, though?▣※※

It sure was! And brimming with adventure as well!

Yeah, hehe.

*Ahem* Master Captain.

We're thinking of bringing this all to a conclusion. What do you think?

Say a few final words.

That's right.

These things usually end up with the protagonist's final line transitioning into a monologue to the audience.

※□□What was that word you□used earlier?

Cliché.

That's right! This has all only been a glimpse of what's to come.

The real adventure starts now!

Welcome back, El Capitan.

!!

Jeez, how corny.

▣Is this what you meant▣by "cliché"?

Yeah...

▣▣▣Will you explain it□※to me later?

Er... I'll think about it.

Well, don't just stand there, Master Captain. Come over here.

We should take a photo as a memento.

It is the ending cutscene, after all.

Commander? What are you doing here?

... I see.

Anyway, what was that you said about me being early?

H-how did you know that?

...

Hey, I thought we agreed to meet outside the cafe. What are you doing insi...

Oh, Pal. Hi.

Yeah. For a request.

Welcome back, Miss Milk.

Welcome, Privaty.

What can I help you all with? We're not open yet...

A report came in about an unregistered AI sighting.

We've had cases where people try and save a few credits by not reporting AI units.

What? Why would someone make a report against Cafe Sweety for something so minor?

I'm sure they had their reasons.

... Although to be honest, I'm sure they're just throwing their weight around.

You think so? I don't mind all that much, since it's an easy request.

Anyway, would you like some chocolate, Pal?

!!!

Wow, straight to the chocolates! You're a natural!

Huh? You want some too?

No, I'm fine.

Suit yourself.

... By the way. You seem to have been wearing that outfit a lot lately.

Are you interested?

For old times' sake, I could lend you a spare outfit if you want.

Ha! Please.

I'd look like a little kid. People would think I was Sugar and Frima's daughter or something.

... You know you shouldn't say everything that comes to your mind.

Anyway, even I never imagined that I'd be wearing this kind of clothing until recently.

Huh? I thought you wore that stuff because you liked it. You're always looking like that whenever I see you.

Don't you think so too, Pal?

*Sigh*...

What a shame!

I think these kinds of outfits would look incredibly cute on you, Miss Milk.

It wouldn't even have to be a maid outfit, necessarily.

Can we please move on? If there's no unregistered AI here, then I'm leaving.

I'm considering this case closed, so I don't want to hear anything more about i—

Welcome to the Maid Cafe!

Gah! What is that?!

Oh boy...

Huh?

We don't allow violence inside the cafe.

I'm not worried anyway. I'm a hologram, after all.

You... You were at that factory on the surface!

And furthermore, Ade.

How were you able to stop me?

Because I'm a maid.

Maid my foot!

Y-you again?! What are you doing here?!

And what's with that ridiculous mustache and hat?

So, you remember me. I've been upgraded.

Upgraded?

Now, I am Sweet Johnny Ver. 2.14.

But you can just call me Johnny.

I don't care what your name is!

So you're the unregistered AI.

Your framework was supposed to be in a factory on the surface. How did you make it inside the Ark?

Well, it's a rather long story, you see.

Many millennia ago, when life first appeared on our planet...

What the... How long is this story going to be?!

Ade! When are we going to have dinner tog... huh?

What's everyone doing here?

□※□□Looks like they got▣□started without us.▣※

What?! Unacceptable!

How can you have a group meal without rum? Wait here a moment, I'll go and fetch some.

Hey, Master.

Hello, Master.

Hold on, is this thing your friend, Commander?

What's going on here?!

What are you doing fraternizing with an illegal AI?

Personally, I much prefer the term "unauthorized".

Don't quibble with me!

*Gasp*!

Yes?

Haha, I'm not sure, but I know that I'm looking forward to it.