We Are So Emotional

Oh, hello, Master. What brings you here so late at night?

If you're looking for a book to read before you go to sleep, I'd be happy to help you find one from your preferred genre.

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L-let's see... I can't find it on the shelves! Maybe someone has it checked out?

...Oh, here it is! Goodness, what was it doing here, of all places?

I suppose whomever read it last never learned that you're supposed to put a book back on its shelf when you're done with it. Hmph.

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Sorry to keep you waiting. We have a few editions to choose from, but I recommend this one personally.

It's been translated into more modern language, and it also has commentary explaining the finer points and references of the original text, so it's perfect as an introduction to the work.

It's rather interesting how differently translators interpret a text. The same thing happens with my own book, "The Tale of Genji."

In fact, if you were so inclined, you may even find it fun to try reading multiple editions and see how each one handles a given text.

Some of them are written with very casual, modern language, which certainly makes for a fun and breezy read...

...but personally, I think your first exposure to a classic like this should be an edition that can serve as a proper introduction to...

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Ah.

I-I'm so sorry! I didn't realize how much I was babbling...

Ahem.

At any rate, Master, may I ask why you thought to read "The Pillow Book"?

Mhm, mhm.

Now I see. You want to know more about what Nagiko's life was like in the Imperial Palace.

Well, I can tell you that when she was there, she used to serve Lady Fujiwara-no-Teishi as her mistress.

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...Yes, of course.

I served Lady Fujiwara-no-Shoushi, who married the emperor some time after her. So, in that sense...

...I suppose Lady Teishi was rival of sorts.

However...

I don't think Lady Shoushi ever truly considered Lady Teishi her enemy.

I didn't, either. Many people were deeply stricken upon Lady Teishi's passing, especially premature as it was.

It's said that the happy days described in "The Pillow Book" are a mixture of truth and fiction.

While that may or may not be true, I can say with absolute certainty...

...that the wise and beautiful Lady Teishi described by Sei Shounagon was an honest depiction.

From everything I heard about her...

...I know that she was blessed with an abundance of wit and charm, even as she remained friendly and affable.

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Oh, that's right. I remember hearing about this as well.

Hehe...

So, as you can see, she could also be very playful.

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From what I was told, Sei Shounagon was fairly quiet and reserved when she first entered service in the palace.

She reminded many of a frail, skittish animal.

And apparently, it was Lady Teishi herself who helped her realize her true talents.

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I think that question can best be answered by you reading her book for yourself, Master.

All right, here you go. One modern-day translation of "The Pillow Book."

I do hope you enjoy it.

Huh...?

Shadduuup!!!

Aah! The library doors!

Come quick, Kaorucchi! We got an emergency on our hands!

I swear, of all the times for Chan-mas not to be in his room...

Uh... Am I interrupting something?

Were you two having a moment? Did I just super rain on your parade?

Sorry! Weeelp, don't mind me! I'll be going and you can get back to what you were doing!

What? No! This is nothing like that!

M-Master was just here to borrow a book!

B-besides, didn't you just say you were looking for him? And that there's some sort of emergency?

Oh yeah! Wow, almost forgot!

Something crazy's going on in the cafeteria right now! Will you two come with me?

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Shadow Servants!?

What in the world happened here!?

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A takopar.

...Sorry, a what?

You know, a takoyaki party.

Um... I'm sorry, but could you maybe start at the beginning?

Very well.

It all began just over an hour ago...

Okay, the rest is all you guys. We cats are nocturnal creatures, and the sun's down, so it's bedtime!

Though of course, we also take plenty of catnaps during the day. I mean, it's right there in the name.

You got it! Thanks for getting us all set up!

We'll take it from here. You just go ahead and curl up like a happy kitty, Myoubu.

Excuse me, but could you not talk to me like I'm some sort of pet? Just what do you think I am, anyway!?

Well, I don't wanna get lost in the weeds now, so we can pick this up another time. Make sure you ladies and germs don't stay up all night!

All right, now that it's just us, let's get this takoyaki party started!

Like, don't gotta tell me twice. I am totes about quantity over quality with stuff like this!

I brought all sorts of fillings, but I think I'll start with good old classic octopus.

Hold up! Keep the devilfish on that plate, will you!?

This here side's just for Western type eats☆ We got cheese, we got bacon, and of course, we got butter, too!

Damn, I've never had takoyaki with that stuff in it before! Is that American-style or something?

American? Hmm, I don't really know, but I can tell you it's definitely a healthy style!

Back in outer space, there was this terrible curse that made it so even Servants could gain weight...

...but we don't have to worry about that at all here in Chaldea! It's awesome!

Oh, you queens want in on this batch, too?

No cheese.

This is the Celt-slash-Norse area, where cheese is strictly forbidden. You're okay with that, right, Scáthach?

Ah, yes... I suppose that's fine.

I had never heard of takoyaki, let alone a "takopar," before, so I have no idea of what to expect, anyway.

You seem much more comfortable with this modern-day world than me, Medb, so I am happy to defer to you.

Hey, don't sweat the small stuff! Just cook what you enjoy and enjoy what you cook.

I-I see. Is that what I'm supposed to do?

Cook what I enjoy...and enjoy what I cook... Hmm...

Man, it's like, kind of amazing, seeing a couple of queens poking at takoyaki...

I mean, our own upbringing's nothing to sneeze at either, but still.

C'mon, you too, Ricacchi. Don't just stand there! Go ahead and toss in some choice eats!

Yeah, uh...

I just came by to get a glass of water. I...have no idea what is going on here...

Oh, really?

Well, who cares!? You're here now! So, what do you wanna try first? Any foods you dislike?

You don't ever actually listen to anyone, do you!?

Besides, I just had dinner, so I'm really not hungry. Seriously, I'm not.

It's fine, don't worry. Nagiko even wrote in her book that there's always room for octopus.

Truth.

Did you really!? That's hilarious! Hahaha!

(I mean, it's not just that.)

(I know these are all good people...)

(But I don't know how much more of this party atmosphere I can take!)

So yeah.

At first, everyone was just eating and laughing and having a great time.

A question, if I may?

Hm?

This, um, "takopar"... Was it open to anyone who wished to join?

Sure was.

Paisen and C.J. and me were all hanging out when the takoyaki came up, so we just decided to make a whole bunch of it.

Then the queens showed up while we were getting everything set up in the cafeteria, and from there...

Oh, wait. Did you want in on the takopar action too, Kaorucchi?

Naw, what am I saying! That's not your scene!

Despite her cheerful protests to the contrary, deep down, Nagiko thought,

"Oh man, Kaorucchi totally wanted in on the takopar, didn't she? I'll make sure she gets an invite next time."

"She might wanna come in a different outfit, though. I'm sure she'd be bummed if she couldn't get the grease smell out of her nice clothes."

Though of course, she was careful to keep those thoughts to herself.

Khh...!

Kaorucchi? You okay!?

Y-yes, I'm fine. My Taizan Commentary Fest just caught me off guard, that's all...

Yeah? 'Kay, if you're sure!

Anyway, getting back on track.

We were all having a blast for a while, but then I noticed we'd run out of fillings...

Huh? We're all out of cheese and bacon.

And the sweet stuff too, now that I'm looking closer.

All right, Nagiko, go get some more food from the kitchen.

Bahahaha! What are you, some kind of queen or something!?

Why yes, I am. Oh, and don't forget the ice cream for dessert.

... (Burned her tongue so badly she can't speak)

Oh!

I-it's okay, I'll go. I'm sure I can find something in the fridge...eventually...

Don't worry, Ricacchi, I got this. You just stay and enjoy the food.

'Sides, if that mountain of takoyaki on your plate is anything to go by, you've still got plenty of eating left to do.

Here, have some more.

Eep!

All right, be back in a jiff! Let's see, fillings and ice cream, fillings and ice cream...

Aah! My chance to sneak out!

(Rustle, rustle)...Nnn.

Raw meat's kinda gross when you see it in big bloody chunks, huh? I can't believe Emiyan and the kitchen gang can just cut that stuff up like it's no big deal.

I wonder if there's anything sweet around here, like fruit or something...

Oh? What's this now?

Do my eyes deceive me, Nagiko, or are you in something of a predicament!?

That voice... Is that

Why yes, it's me! Everyone's favorite idol: Andersen!

Hey, Mephy. What're you doing here?

Mm-mmm! Well played! You saw through my obvious setup beautifully!

You know, is it just me, or do this girl and I simply have the worst possible chemistry?

We're all having a takopar right now. You should join us.

Oh no, I couldn't. I'm a demon, after all.

I wouldn't dream of pretending to be all buddy-buddy with everyone, not even if I was giving myself away as part of some demonic summer sale.

Oh, but a Christmas sale might be a different story! I've always enjoyed big piles of presents!

Aw man, is that true, Mephy? Your childhood must've sucked.

But hey, at least now you're a grown-up! So tell me, what do you want for Christmas this year?

Oh, no, you don't have to worry about me. After all, I never had a childhood!

At any rate, I've been sitting in the kitchen corner watching you for a while now...

...and I couldn't help but notice you seem to be looking for some ingredients?

You could tell, huh? Yeah, I just can't seem to find what I'm looking for.

Then today is your lucky day! Voilà!

What I have here is something veeery rare and special, and acquired by...well, let's not trouble ourselves about that bit!

With just a single taste, you'll sleep like the dead and wake ready and raring to go!

Disclaimer: may be poisonous when used for exhaustion recovery or stress relief! That's right! This is a strange and wonderful one-of-a-kind chocolate!

The package just says "Trial Product," and it's guaranteed to wreak havoc on your digestive system!

Sah-weet! You're the best, Mephy!

There's something extra yummy about chocolate. Almost feels like I've got some good memories associated with it...

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Um, are you suuure about this?

You could very well end up exploding the moment you put this in your mouth, you know?

Whoa, really? Now that you mention it, I saw that in a food porn manga.

I...see.

Well, uh, you just...go ahead and take it. It's all yours.

I'm just... Yes, I'm just going to go sit in my corner.

Wooo! Thanks, Mephy!

You and I should totes go clothes shopping sometime!

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Yup! It was yummy.

You, um, may want to exercise a bit more caution about what you choose to consume in the future...

Wahaha!

He's been giving me candy from time to time anyway, so I guess I didn't think anything of it!

Anyway, here's where shit gets serious.

After I got back, we made a batch of takoyaki with the chocolate for the filling.

It turned out to be surprisingly popular, and before I knew it, that batch was all gone.

But right when everyone finished eating, they started getting all woozy...

And then this weird black stuff started seeping out of them.

So that's how these Shadow Servants got here...

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Aw crap, he saw us!

All right, pal, if it's a fight you want, then bring it on!

Whoa, whoa, hold up!

It's just me! The real me!

H-huh? Ricacchi? Weren't you pitch black over there just a moment ago?

No, uh... I never actually ate any of that takoyaki.

I just pretended to eat. I was slipping it in my shirt the whole time.

In your shirt.

After that, well...

I missed my chance to get away, so I just kinda...stood there...

...and I guess none of them ever noticed me.

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So you never had any, Ricacchi?

Do you not like takoyaki or something?

N-no, it's not that.

I'm just, uh, not really much for parties, is all...

Gotcha. Nnn...

Oh, uh, don't get me wrong! I'm not mad at you or anything!

Never mind that now.

Lord Mandricardo, do you still have the takoyaki in question?

Oh, uh, yeah, I think so.

Yup, here it is.

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Yes. I can sense some strange and...unsettling magical energy coming from it.

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So, one bite of this chocolate lets you recover from exhaustion and relieves stress, was it?

I'm not sure yet, but my suspicion is that...

...this chocolate is an elixir of sorts which gives one's stress a physical form.

So when everyone here ate it, the stress they didn't know they had came out all at once, tied itself to this unsettling magical energy, and produced this new kind of Shadow Servant.

As such, I think the most apt name for them may be:

Stress Servants!

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And here I thought "Shadow Servants" was a little on the nose.

But that doesn't mean I don't like it, Kaorucchi!

Um... Thank you...

At any rate, there is another reason I believe this Stress Servant hypothesis is correct.

You see, it would explain why you are still yourself after eating the chocolate.

Aww, was that a compliment?

No, wait, it wasn't, was it?

Unfortunately, there is one other problem this situation poses!

The causes of stress tend to be highly personal.

If these dark beings are the personification of each Servant's stress, then they must also contain sensitive information about those Servants.

So facing these Stress Servants in combat could mean we end up violating the original Servants' privacy, which would be a grave moral

Sorry, Murasaki. Think we're outta time for exposition.

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Lady Skadi...!

It's so... So...

Hot.

...I'm sorry?

Why are so many things in Chaldea so hot?

I know what you mean.

I know what you mean.

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No, Master.

I don't think it's anything quite that serious.

Why are the baths here so hot?

Why must they eat noodles in hot soup?

Ahh... I can't stand heat.

Surely there must also be beauty that can only be found in the middle of a harsh winter...

I know what you mean.

I know what you mean.

I totally get that.

I-I don't disagree, but I don't think now is the time for that discussion!

Oh, right. My bad. I just kind of responded without thinking.

Anyway, if that chocolate's what made these things...

...that basically means this is all my fault, huh?

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Well, we gotta stop 'em somehow...and we probably shouldn't do that in the cafeteria.

Master, could you go set up the simulator?

I'll lure these things over there once you're ready.

Wh-what're you thinking, Ricacchi!? You can't just throw your life away!

Not planning on it.

Don't worry. This, I can do.

Oh, hell. Not you too, Master! Never call me that again! Please!

It's cool. I got this.

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Okay, see you guys soon.

Thank you so much for your help, Lord Mandricardo! We'll have the simulator ready soon!

Thanks for handling things, Riacchi!

When this is all over, I'm gonna make it my mission to turn that frown of yours upside down!

All right, let's do this! Gooo team!

...C'mon, C.J., wake up already. You too, Paisen.

Hm? ...Huh? Was I sleeping?

Ugh, what time is it? Feels like I've been for, like, ever.

Looks like the original Servants were all knocked out while that was going down.

They don't look any worse for wear, so I'm guessing they'll probably be fine.

(Sniff) Well, I've learned my lesson. No more chocolate for me.

Hey, don't sweat it. These things happen.

Hell, if I let my every screwup get me down, I'd

But don't worry, Ricacchi! Next time, I'll make sure to only bring fillings that are totally safe for consumption!

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Next time?

Yeah! Next time, you, me, and Kaorucchi are gonna get together...

...for a nice, somber tako-tea party!

And since it'll just be the three of us, you won't have to worry about things getting too lively!

(...)

(Not sure that's true if she'll be there, since she's plenty lively on her own...)

Did you say something, Mandricardo!?

I, uh...

I can't wait...

Oh my gods, this is the worst! How'd I end up with this weird mark on my face after nodding off!?

Come on, Scáthach, wake up.

Once we get back, we're heading straight for the...bath... ...?

Mmm.

I am not sure why, but I feel absolutely wonderful, almost as if I have been reborn.

So this is the benefit of attending a "takopar"...

I like it!

I really don't think that had anything to do with it!

Hey, it's all good, right?

If nothing else, everyone did manage to get their stress out, so it looks like it all worked out in the end, no?

There you go again...

Still, I suppose you're right.

It seems everything did work out in the end.

Exactly! How much more could you ask for than a happy ending?

Well, good night, Master. I'm sure you must be tired after everything that happened, so I do hope you sleep well.

You too, Nagiko.

Perhaps you could at least consider toning things down a bit so late in the night?

Ahaha, maybe! If I feel like it.

(Sigh) You really are incorrigible, aren't you...

Now then...

Chan-mas, I know it's super late and all...

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But will you help me clean everything up!?

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There! Clean as a whistle!

Sorry to drag you into this, especially when you didn't even get to join the takopar.

But I didn't think it'd be right to ask the others to help clean up after everything that happened.

I guess getting you to help when you already helped fix the whole mess in the first place isn't much better, huh? Wahaha!

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Heh. There you go again.

I'm sure you're plenty tired yourself, but you still insist on powering through.

This is exactly your problem, you know?

Not that I'm in a position to say anything since I'm the reason you're all tired out in the first place!

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H-huh?

Where'd that come from, Chan-mas?

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Hoo boy.

You must've borrowed a real weird book at the library today, huh?

Still, you're not wrong. I'd be lying if I said it was never hard for me.

But it's not that simple either. You see...

I almost never get sad, because I'd rather just be dazzling!

Hey now, don't you laugh at me. I'm serious.

So, um, what I mean by "dazzling" here is...

Well...

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...You know something, Chan-mas?

I was kind of hoping I'd get to see her again...but she wasn't inscribed in the Throne of Heroes.

At least...I don't think she was.

Instead, I'd bet right nowwell, really for the past thousand years...

...she's been far, far away, enjoying the afterlife in paradise.

And who knows? Maybe she comes down here now and then to check in on me and have another laugh at my expense.

But think about it. That's kind of scary, right?

What if she dropped by and saw me all bummed out? Wouldn't that absolutely suck?

That's why I can't let anything get me down.

I need to make sure she'll never see me looking sad.

I gotta make sure she never has trouble finding me, no matter where I might be.

I might not be able to continue "The Pillow Book" anymore...

...but I still wanna be able to show her that I'm here, and I'm happy, and I'm full of emotion.

That's what I mean when I say I want to always be dazzling.

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The end.

What, that's it!? Come ON! What was even the point of that story!?

Oh man, I can't believe I had to be my own straight woman! Talk about embarrassing!

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Hwachaaa!!!

Come on, Chan-mas, don't you start getting all wistful on me!

Though, you know...

Even having said that, there are still times I doubt myself.

Times I worry that if I stumble and fall again...

...I might not be able to pick myself back up.

That I might just wake up, like it was all a dream, and all the passion I feel now could just drift out of me...

...until I'm trapped in a world where all the colors are dull and faded, and I can never go back.

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So here's the deal.

If that ever does happen to me, Chan-mas, I want you to snap me out of it.

I want you to take me to places I've never been, show me things I've never seen...

Inspire me with so much dazzle I can't help but want to tell her all about it...

And convince me that there's plenty of beauty in this world, no matter where we go.

That's something I'm pretty sure you can do for me.

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Hmm...

But then again, I honestly still don't really get how Masters and Servants are supposed to relate to each other...

...so maybe that's a weird thing to ask?

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Hehehe, awesome.

Well then, I guess we're all good!

...Oh man, I didn't realize how long we've been talking. We'd better turn in, or tomorrow's gonna be rough.

So I'm just gonna line up some of those chairs and get some shut-eye here. Night!

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Hell yeah. It's got the AC keeping things nice and cool, and Emiyan's way better at waking me up than any alarm clock.

Trust me, this is a great place to sleep.

Hey, I know! Why don't you line up some chairs and see for yourself?

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Wahaha, come on, didn't you ever have a slumber party? It'll be super fun! You'll see!

Hey, mind turning out that light?

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