Posher's Story

If it's bitter, it means it's working. If it's nutritious, the taste comes second, don't you think?

You're not speaking sense. An antacid is a type of medicine that helps digestion.

Since it helps your body function, wouldn't you say it's good for your health?

And since it's good for your health, it should taste bitter, just like a restorative tonic, right?

Then what's the problem? It's no different from a restorative tonic, so hurry up and drink it.

Let's go, down the hatch!

Hmm... Not going to drink it?

Dear me, you aren't even a sprite yet you're whining about it being bitter. You've become too accustomed to their lifestyle, Master.

A bellflower-tomato-potato shake.

A bellflower-tomato-potato shake.

A bellflower-tomato-potato-sucker.

What? What do you mean?

I said that there's bellflower root, tomatoes, and potatoes in this shake. Hence, bellflower-tomato-potato-shake.

Mhmm. You've been a little on edge lately, haven't you?

It's because you haven't been getting enough nutrients. Wanna try this shake?

What's wrong with the ingredients?

To supplement carbs.

Come on, just give it a try, okay?

That one's really good for you, though.

It's fine as long as it's nutritious, isn't it?

It's nutrition that matters, not taste. Nothing inside that shake is bad for you. Look at me. I'm super healthy, right?

That's why you're so weak, Master. You only eat the sweet food of sprites, tsk, tsk.

I'm not overlooking that at all. The shake is more than enough to satisfy your appetite. I mean, you get full when you drink it.

Hmmm. You think? If I were a chef, I would've made perfectly nutritious food and everyone would've been healthier.

Hello, Master. I'm on my way to my part-time job. *YAWN*

Sorry? What about my tongue?

Ahh, my boss, Posher... She made a new potion... I guess drinking it made my tongue like this. I think it was a blue potion.

Hmm? I feel completely fine. Oh, I'm running late, I'll see ya!

You're right on time, Master. Wonderful.

Now, now. The weather is lovely today, so I've prepared some tea and refreshments out front.

No? What's not to your liking then?

This location?

Then what? Take a seat first, have some tea, then tell me about it.

Now, why would I do that?

I wonder why you're so suspicious of everything I give you...

You always say that my potions are bitter. Well, this tea shouldn't be. Give it a taste.

What is it, then?

But you gotta test new potions. My potions are highly trusted because they've all been clinically tested.

Did you run into Levi? By the way, Master...

The tea is getting cold. We can continue this conversation while enjoying our tea, don't you think?

There, I've had a taste too. It's the same tea as yours, so no need to be wary of it.

Hmmm. Did Levi say something?

Ahh, that's because the potion I made this time is blue.

Hehe. Yeah, it seems your tongue goes numb shortly after drinking the tea, causing you to lose your sense of taste.

Every study needs a control group. Levi's not the only one I do clinical trials on, you know?

Hehe, since you've already had a cup, you might as well finish off the rest. Come on, down the hatch!

Hellooo? Anyone thereee?

Hmm? Were you in the middle of brewing potions?

You're a little late this time, Sist.

Come on, you know how things are! It's hard to get the goods these days.

Um... So you failed to get all the goods?

Hey now, what do you take me for?

I never break a deal! Trust is the very foundation of my business. Would I be here if I didn't get them all?

Oho.

Here, look for yourself!

Your order was for...

Dragonhorn powder, stale sprite bread crumbs, werebeast hair, and...

And let me think... Ah, yes. Elemental bark and well-dried moss.

Mhmmm. Just what I ordered.

Oh, and please have a look at this... This is something that's been freshly collected. The claw of a werebeast living near Yggdrasil...

Nope, not interested. How much for the dragonhorn powder?

Ah, that one was hard to procure this time. It'll be 5 extra Gold than before.

Hmm... It's gotten quite expensive. What about the werebeast hair?

That'll also be 3 extra Gold. Molting season is over, so it's hard to come by these days.

I see... Well, no matter. Hmm...

Hmm... Something seems...

Strange. It isn't really the quality, but the ingredients themselves...

This is a shard of a horn of the legendary horned foal... Uh... Is there something wrong, ma'am?

This. They don't look like sprite bread crumbs.

And this... Is this really werebeast hair? It looks like the hair of just a regular beast...

How can you say such a thing?!

D-Darn, did she catch on? Nah... she couldn't have!

Are you really questioning me?! Really? We've been doing business together for years!

I go through so much trouble to procure these items that are so hard to come by these days! How could you say such a thing?! You know me! I'm a stickler for honesty!

That's true. Well... Okay.

Ahh, I knew you weren't like that! Er, what are you doing?

Hmm? Well, I just wanted to pay you back for all your hard work, Sist.

Here you go. Drink this while I pick through some more of your ingredients.

Ha-ha-ha. How nice of you, but I'm fine! It's not right for me to drink my own wares.

Are you refusing my sign of hospitality?

Oh, no, no! I'll have some, thank you!

I gave you that potion to drink, not to sell. It's a new reinvigorating potion, so drink up.

Or... Perhaps you don't trust me?

Oh, noooo, it's not that I don't trust you, ma'am!

Then maybe you don't trust the ingredients...?

...Erm. Th-Th-That's...

.........

Ma'am... The thing is, there has been a shortage of ingredients lately, so...

No excuses!

How dare you try to deceive me with fake ingredients? Unforgivable!

I-I promith, I wan thoo it again! *Cough, cough!*

M-Ma'am! P-Pwease forgifffe me!

Hmm. No side effects?

That potion's actually been fully tested already. Hmm... but I see... Now I understand the side effect it has on humans.

What... did you just say?

I am not like Elena when it comes to potions. That elf is like ME when it comes to engineering. Got it?

You probably didn't know any better when you said that...

But now that you do, I trust you won't make the same mistake twice.

Take that back. Now!

Too late!

That elf is like ME when it comes to engineering! NOT the other way around! Got it?!

I'll make sure that's drilled into your brain!

Who do you think you are, equating some outsider with a true Elias native?

You better not say something like that again!

Hmph... I'll let it slide this time, but I'm keeping my eye on you. Consider yourself warned.

Fricle has been buying a lot of potions recently. She's become a regular. Everything else is pretty much the same.

Oh, good. Your memory seems to be intact. It seems you won't forget my warning.

I love brewing potions, but I have no desire to turn into some ridiculously powerful witch.

Why do I have to be strong? If I need something that requires strength, I'll just hire a strong witch to work for me.

Hm? What was that?

Yes, that's right—what's wrong, Master?

I know I'm a peddler of potions, but... I think you probably need to exercise.

Hmm... I suppose you're right. Wait here a moment.

Here, you go. Drink this.

It's going to be pretty bitter because I had to make it quickly. Best to gulp it down in one go.

I have some licorice. Want some?

How do you feel? It kicks in right away, doesn't it? You know it's good for you if it's bitter!

Oh, that's a freebie.

Heh.

No takesies-backsies once it's down the hatch.

That's the charm of my potions.

I mean, elves put sugar in their coffee, and sprites spread jam on their bread, right?

It's no fun having food with a single flavor. Same with potions. It's boring if they only have one effect.

You had that antacid before, and you like how strong it made you. It was a custom order, so I added something special for you.

The shoulder pain is gone, though, right?

That, I don't know. Potions work differently for everyone.

On top of that, you're human. Something that takes 10 seconds for a witch could take 10 minutes for you.

There's a chance something will get your arms moving again faster than expected. If that happens, let me know. It'll be useful to know for my next potion.

Come back anytime.

Uh-huh. I'm listening.

I know, I know. I heard you, okay?

Uh... that... Sist took a huge cut as commission, right...?

I sold the Reinvigorating Potion to her for 9 gold.

Wow... a 10x markup. That's Sist for you.

Oh dear, I didn't mean to blurt out how Sist makes a profit. I'll need to apologize next time I see her.

No, not that. Umm...

It's... sort of a childhood dream of mine... umm...

Oh, don't overreact. It's nothing special, just...

I've always wanted to make the ultimate elixir. It was a childhood fantasy or something...

...So you're saying I've been tainted by the ways of the world now?

Hmph. Whatever. I'm so tainted now that I don't even want to talk about my dream anymore.

Oh, close. My childhood dream was to make the ultimate elixir.

How did you know?

Oho... you're surprisingly perceptive, Master.

...What do you take me for? Am I some sort of wicked witch in your eyes?

Ha. I see. I don't need to answer your question then, right? Since I'm such a wicked witch?

Hmph, never mind. Why would you be interested in something like a wicked witch's childhood dream or anything?

Hmph.

Now I know exactly how you view me...

I see... that's why you never wanted to even touch the things I offer you.

Don't you know that something bitter is actually good for you?

Hah. Fine. All it boils down to is that I'm wicked and you want nothing to do with the things I offer you.

Good. Next time, I'll make a really nice potion just for you, Master.

Heehee, what shall I make?

You drink it, and for three days, you'll feel full of energy, but the day after that, you'll have zero strength and can hardly move.

Sigh... You just don't get it, Master.

The day of complete exhaustion has to be part of it, okay? That's the trick to getting customers to come back every three days for more.

Of course! I'm not just in the business of making potions. I also sell them.

For me, the ultimate elixir is a potion that is a steady seller.