Snorky's Story

Hmm... *Sigh*

Ah, this cold and musty smell of the back alleys. How nostalgic...

Nothin's changed here. Not the temperature... not the humidity.

That's right, back when I used to show up in these parts, everyone would lower their heads and carefully tiptoe away.

Pira's business savvy, the kickbacks from sendin' those suckers to Canta's spinnin' top joint...

It all got split right here...

Ah, this is also where we formed the Triangle Alliance, didn't we?

Those glory days are all in the past now...

Wait... that sound...

Who's spinnin' tops at this hour?

Me, ya bastard.

Would you look at that! I knew it was you, Canta! You're back?

What, shocked I'm still around?

A little.

What's brought you here?

Knew ya'd come back at least once.

Ya got any idea the hell I went through just to run into ya?

I even hid next to this stinking trash bin, pretending to be garbage!

What, trash of a feather flock together, is that it?

Excuse me?

You by yourself now...?

Yeah. Thanks to you, I'm single now.

Pira cut me off completely. 'N whose fault do ya think that is? Yers!

I know it was ya, Snorky. Ya broke my heart.

What?

Did ya really have to spill everything to the Order?!

.........

What are we doin' here?

Come on, let's hear what ya gotta—wait, what?!

Are you actin' out some play or somethin' here? If you wanna talk, look me in the eye.

Why the heck are you talkin' into the air?!

Look at this bastard!

Ya think I don't know you're the rat who wrecked our business?!

I clocked it when ya had that strange look on yer face at Pira's office.

Pira said it was nothing... but I should've known better!

I only did what had to be done.

As someone servin' the Don, how could I just sit by and watch the Order Family fall apart?

Hah! As if ya entered that Family because ya wanted to out o' the pureness o' yer heart!

I know ya entered the Order Family to take 'em over!

'N now ya wanna act like you're different from us? Don't act like yer hands ain't dirty!

The Snorky back then... and the one you see standin' here now... they aren't the same.

I promised the Don, and every single member of the Order Family, that I'd live a new life.

A new life? You, Snorky?

Cut the crap before I boil ya alive, 'n let's get the Triangle Alliance back together.

If we combine yer fists 'n my brains, we'll track Pira down in no time.

Then we get it all back. That glorious time when we owned these back alleys!

That's all in the past now, Canta.

There's no way we can return to those glory days by ourselves anymore.

Stop hidin' like this and come with me. Start over.

Don't make me laugh. Ya really think I'd fall for that?

Were ya promised the Order Family if ya handed me and Pira in or something?

*Sigh* Looks like you have no intention of listenin' to me at all, do you?

Then I suppose we can end this little chat.

It doesn't look like I can do anythin' more for you.

What? You wanna fight?

Let's hug one last time.

All of a sudden?

I tried pullin' ya back to my side, but since that failed, too...

Guess I'll disappear just like Pira.

Still, considering all we've been through,

a quick hug before I go wouldn't hurt, right?

Y-Yeah, I guess not.

Bring it in, Snorky.

Heh, nothing more ya can do for me, huh?

'Course there's something ya can do for me!

Wh-What the hell are you doin'?

If ya won't come quietly, I'll squeeze a ransom outta that precious Order Family o' yers

and use it to rebuild my ruined spinning top joint!

Untie me right now, Canta!

After I get the ransom... ya won't be good for anything.

That's when I'll need ya to behave 'n head to the Weekend Farm. Hehehe!

I tried grantin' you one last favor outta loyalty... Canta, you're a spineless bastard!

Loyalty? Didn't I tell ya? This world is ruthless.

This rope's the kind I use for my spinning top whip. Even you ain't breaking—

Wh-What?! Who's there?!

Th-This voice...!!

Don, how did you know I was here...?

I can't believe you found me like this when I'm supposed to protect you, Don...

I'm sorry, Don.

Gah, what the hell is this, Snorky, ya slippery little rat?!

Ya ran yer mouth to the Order Family again, did ya?! Was this a setup to catch me from the start?! Ugh!!

And here I was wondering who was making such a racket! I see it was you, Canta.

And who the hell are—Eeek!

Long time no see, Canta. And where is Pira?

H-How the heck should I know?! Why the hell are ya asking me?!

Oh?

Still... I'm sure Pira must really miss ya—her favorite customer!

Right, Snorky?

What are you talkin' about? I thought Pira went into hidin' to avoid the Head Priestess.

I see. She is avoiding me...

A-Ahem...

I have been curious to see how comfortable a life you were living. You know, after stealing the kingdom's money...

But this is disappointing.

...What?

What mosquito, Don?

Has the cold frozen your brain, Don?

Since Pira is not here, please answer in her place, Canta.

Why did you swindle me with fake gold?

I trust you knew that the gold I borrowed was meant to be used for the kingdom?

Hmph, how was I supposed to know whether it was fake or not?

Ya should've checked before ya borrowed it.

We took a pretty big hit ourselves because o' ya!

I-I used to be. Why do you ask?

Huh? What does that mean—

I see. So it was my fault for not recognizing it was a scam?

Wh-What the hell?! Have ya lost yer mind, Head Priestess?! Why'd ya pull out an axe?

A sprite as rotten as you should be sent to the Weekend Farm.

Safe travels.

N-No!!! Aaaah, I'm outta here!!!

Where are you going? I said that you must head to the Weekend Farm. Hehehe.

Wh-What just happened, Don...?

I'm so ashamed, Don...

No...

Why aren't you sayin' anythin', Don?

You clearly wanna ask me somethin', but you're holdin' back, Don.

Yep.

...Actually, today I wanted to take a look back at the ol' days.

That is why I went for a walk in the back alleys, my old stompin' grounds, by myself... That's when I ran into Canta.

Seein' her... was a rush. It felt like I'd gone back in time.

That's why, even though I knew she was targetin' me...

I guess I still have a long way to go, Don.

After all the time I spent goin' around the Order promisin' to change my ways...

Yeah...

Don...!

Got it! I'll escort you back to the Order, safe and sound, Don!

I promise I ain't gonna be bound by my past no more.

I'll serve you with even more loyalty, Don.

Thank you for accepting and saving someone with as many faults as me.

You truly are the perfect boss, Don!

So... you're saying you came to my garden because you actually want to eat some beans?

That's right. What other reason would I have for showin' up here?

Sprite Kingdom is just drownin' in sugar.

You can't even mention the "b" sound in "bean" without faces goin' sour.

If I keep goin' like this without eatin' any beans I'll be finished before I ever take over for the Don.

From what I can see, you've got greens growin' all over your turf.

You gotta have some beans here!

I don't.

What?! You're tellin' me a patch of weeds this big ain't got any beans?!

Keep your voice down! You're going to scare the plants! Also, this isn't a patch of weeds, it's a garden!

Yeah, yeah. The minute I see a single bean when I'm through here...

Yeah? Then what? What are you going to do? Are you going to threaten and scare me like before?

N-No, I just meant if I saw an single bean here, it would be delicious... *Cough*

Anyway, don't think I haven't tried growing beans. But it didn't matter how much I'd look after them or feed them special nutrients...

They just wouldn't sprout. That's why I gave up on them.

You got all these other plants thrivin'! Why are beans the exception?!

You know...

Even plants need lots of love and affection to grow well.

And?

If you don't show them that you care, or use rough language around them like you do...

It doesn't matter how much sunlight or water you give them. They'll stop growing within the soil and they'll only rot.

So?

Sprites don't like beans. It's only natural they can't grow.

Why on earth do they hate them? Beans are so good for you!

I could eat them all day, every day!

Really? You like beans that much?

Of course! Do you know how excited I was comin' here?

I'd even go for bean sprouts if I can't have any beans!

Okay, then. Wait right here.

...? Where you goin' so suddenly?

Ta-da!

The hell?! I thought you said you didn't have any beans! Give it here!

Tsk, tsk. Hold it. I've finally found someone who'd be perfect for growing this bean!

Who?

I'm talking about YOU!

...What kinda bull is that?!

Do you want to try growing this in my garden until it sprouts with your own hands?

Excuse me?

You want me, Snorky, to sit around in this patch of dirt starin' at the ground all day?

You're not like those sprites... You actually like beans, right?

You got this!

All I wanted was to bum some beans off of you... What the heck have I gotten myself into here?

Ugh... you're serious about this? Me? Crap...

Hey, language! A kind word is the best fertilizer. You have to shower it with love.

Remember to pull out the weeds and water it on time, okay?

How the heck did this happen...?

I even crawled back from the bottomless pit! So why am I here, dealin' with this garbage?

And why do these freakin' weeds keep comin' back?!

Whoops! Sorry, bean. I wasn't talkin' to you, so don't go gettin' scared or anythin'.

*Trickle, trickle*

Alright, here's some delicious water!

Drink up and flourish, little bean! Aw, ain't you a beaut! Wow, look at you drink that up!

You gotta make sure you sprout, okay? Promise?

...Damn.. what the heck am I doin' here...?

Whatcha lookin' at, sunflower?! You laughin' at me?!

Look at this punk, gettin' all up in my face! You better step back!

And, you! Carrot!

That H2O is for my bean! Don't get cute with me down there in the dirt just 'cause I can't see, or you'll be sleepin' with the fishes!

Hmm... "My bean"?

Doesn't sound tough enough... It needs a cooler name...

Two-Gun... Pod... Tommy... Beanie...

Two-Pod Beanie! Yeah! Bean, from now on, I'm gonna call you Two-Pod Beanie!

Hahaha! Listen up, Two-Pod Beanie, you better grow fast! You gotta take over this dirt patch and make it your own turf, capisce?!

Oof, I must've nodded off there—what the heck?! Wh-What's goin' on here?!

Did it sprout?! Two-Pod Beanie, is that you?!

Hey, Kyarot, get over here quick and take a look at this!!!!

What's with all the commotion first thing in the morning?

Oh, it actually sprouted! You did it, Snorky!

You did it, Two-Pod Beanie! I knew you wouldn't disappoint me! Hahaha!

Two-Pod Beanie...? Uh, anyway, congrats, Snorky!

Leave it to me now. I'll make sure it thrives until it produces those beans.

How long do I have to wait? One or two days?

What are you talking about? It'll take about a month at least.

What? How the heck do you expect me to wait an entire month?! Let's make it three days.

A month.

...How about a week?

One month!!

Ugh, fine! A month... damn it!

Keep stop shouting like that and you'll stress this new little sprout out. Leave it with me now, and go back.

Ugh, I thought I'd be able to eat some beans right away...

...Still, that was pretty amazin', wasn't it?

Who knew I'd be bringin' some new life into this world with these hands?

Me, who's always been in the shadows, fightin', threatenin', makin' dirty deals... being brought into the light!

Is this what a normal life feels like...?

See you soon, Two-Pod Beanie!

Huh? What do you mean?

I'll be straight with you. I haven't done anythin'.

Which is why I gotta ask for a favor, Don.

I owe these two folks an apology... You think you can come with me?

...First stop's the bakery.

Ugh, I'm so busy! Oh, hey, Master! It has been a while. Are you here for some baked goods?

...Wait, why'd you bring that witch with you?

L-Long time...

Oh? What would that witch have to say to me?

Sorry, I'm too busy. I don't have any to spare on that witch.

.........

Go on, hurry up and keep it short.

Ahem, er, Ashur...? I...

Ugh, spit it out! I told you, I'm busy!

I-I wanna apologize for sayin' magic is somethin' that only weaklings rely on!

Since you run the Magic School, I suppose that would have been upsettin' to hear.

...You really mean that?

Yeah. Truth is, I figured if I came alone, you'd throw me out before I could say anythin'. That's why I brought the Don.

Strange... You're not the type to apologize so readily... What are you up to?

...?! AHHHH!! My cookies! They're burning!! NOOOOOOOOO!!!!

Uh... That ended faster than I expected.

What? You're here to apologize? Not to buy anything?

Sure, I'll hear you out...

Sist, remember when we traded soy milk on the black market?

Ah, you mean the time I couldn't quite cover the full volume we agreed on.

...I'm sorry I called you a dirty, low-down, greedy hustler lookin' for a quick buck who can't even move merchandise.

I see... So, you'd like to place an order for my forgiveness?

In that case, I will require an apology fee.

My time is very precious, you see. Hehehe...

Why are you acting so surprised? This is what a merchant does. They sell!

But still, who in the world charges money to receive an apology?

Right here, valued customer!

I get paid, and she gets forgiven! It's a win-win situation! Heehee!

This right here is the secret to how merchants make a profit. Hehehe...

Exactly! That's not how you accept an apology with sincerity!

Oh, not only do you want an order of forgiveness, but you'd also like to add a side of "sincerity"?

I'm afraid that will cost extra, ma'am!

That's not what I'm sayin'...

Oh, then would you like to remove "sincerity" from the invoice?

No, that's not it either...

Oh, then should I add "sincerity" to your checkout again?

Ugh, fine... I guess my own karma's catchin' up to me.

My precious time is still ticking away here...

H-How much do I owe you?

Aw, just enough to make me happy. I'm not fussy.

Why, thank you very much! Come again next time!

If I can atone for my sins this way, I'm f-fine... Hah...

What?! Belita?! I don't think I'm ready for that yet...

I do, but still...

What?

Hello, Master. And... Snorky? Is that you? Heard you two were running together. Looks like the rumors checked out.

*Cough*

About me? What?

Sigh...

B'litasryfrgoinroundcausintrble...

What... did you say?

Me? Why?

Yeah...

...Are you saying that milk and soy milk are two different things, Master?

.........

Y-Yeah.

I apologize, Snorky. My ignorance caused you to suffer.

H-Huh?

It may be late, but I mean it.

Er...

Oh, uh... Right. Me too, Belita. I'm sorry, too.

Yep, today was a day like no other.

I squared things up with Ashur and Sist, a weight I carried on my conscience all this time...

But who the hell would've thought that me and Belita would be clearin' the air between us?!

I'm feelin' all warm and mushy inside.

Who the heck does this Festa think she is, orderin' me around and all?

If Don didn't tell me to go see her, I'd already be puttin' her in her place.

Tch. She was supposed to be waitin'. Where the hell is she?

A hyena wandering the empty wilderness of Monatium, searching for freedom! Festa's here, baby!

...She doesn't seem right in the head.

Right on! You're that notorious thug, Snorky, right?!

What? A thug? I'm no two-bit street trash. I've got a code of honor!

Eh, "thug" is nice. It rolls off the tongue better. Just go with thug!

Anyway, I heard you busted outta that witch prison! You're the talk of the town!

...? Yeah, that's right. What's it to you?

That rock spirit of yours totally gave me some rad inspiration, that's what!

I wanna turn your story of escape into a song. What do you say?!

A song?

Totally! My roaring artistic heart is vibing with your experience of tearing your way into freedom!

Just thinking about it gives me chills, right?!

Once we drop that track, every race in Elias is gonna lose their minds over us!

Hmm, is it really that big a deal...?

Of course!

You clawed your way out on your own with nothing but your own strength!

It's your own blood and sweat that led you to find your freedom!

You took your freedom back with your own hands!

It's like she doesn't even care why I was in prison...

She's only hung up on the fact that I broke out...

Still, it ain't so bad bein' put on a pedestal like this for a change.

Y-You really think so?

Of course! This kinda stuff needs to be turned into a song and spread far and wide for all to hear!

Now, hurry up and start talking, you liberated thug!

...The place I was thrown in was an endless pit, a bottomless abyss.

A nightmarish, pitch-black prison that Belita cooked up.

Geez, just hearing about it makes my chest hurt. So, then what happened?

All the witches that ended up there gave up on escapin'. But not me. Not Snorky!

I had somethin' I just had to do when I got outta there, you see.

What was that?

Revenge! I was gonna rebuild my gang and pay Belita back!

I wanted to give her a taste of the same humiliation she gave me when she threw me into that hellhole.

I love it! A lesson on how precious freedom is... made into a brutal remix!

I never gave up. Not even when my grip slipped, and I lost all my nails, or when my legs went numb, and I lost my footin'.

I just focused on my goal. On everythin' I had to reclaim once I was out again.

I climbed and climbed.

Hahaha! Something's coming! Inspiration's exploding within me!

Heh... Bahaha...

Who the hell just laughed?!

Oh, hey, Xion. When do you get here?

I've been here ever since you started this tragic little tale... I heard everything from up here. Hehehe.

Why're you up in that tree?

Ugh, quiet! This is exactly the type of entrance heroes make!

Ahem. Allow me to introduce myself.

I am the Black Light of Elias, the Magic Bullet Slinger... Xion!

.........

What's wrong with everyone around here? No one seems to be in their right minds.

Yes... That dumbfounded look on your face... I see you've finally realized who I am!

What are you talkin' about? Who are you? Am I supposed to know you?

I'm someone who knows what it means to DIE... To put it simply, I'm the sole witness to the Light and Dark Divide.

That bottomless abyss or whatever you crawled out of? It's not even close to what I've faced.

...The old me would've just punched her...

Oh, excuuuuuse me. I guess what I, the Magic Bullet Slinger, just said might be...

a bit out of your depth?

Let me say this in a way you'll understand. I have stood before the WEEKEND FARM itself... and returned.

Wow... This is bad...

She's worse off than I thought she was...

Why the heck are you getting in the way all of a sudden?! I'm making a song here!

Ah, that look. I know what you want to ask.

You want to know how I survived that place, right?

But no can do. You still don't know enough for me to reveal such things.

It's dangerous. It's deep and fatal... like peering into your own abyss...

Snorky, just ignore her and keep going with your story...

What a load of crap. Who do you think you're tryin' to fool here? You think this fake-it-til-you-make-it act is gonna get me to believe that bull?

You've got years to go before that happens, pal!

Arrrrgggh! Nuh-uh! I'm not faking anything! I'm being serious!

I'm a TRANSCENDANT BEING who's been chosen, okay?!

I told you I need to write my song here...

*Snrk* What? A transcendent being? You?

It's true! Ask Master! Master knows this, too!

Urgh... I'm stuck in this pissing contest and can't break free...!

I... I need to get away from this!

I'm outta here!

Yes, Don. I will accompany you.

You can't shake me, Don. You should know that by now.

What?! Wh-Why...?

Have I done somethin' to upset you, Don?

Still... No! This is absolutely out of the question!

Hold on, Don! Let me go and scout ahead!

Uh, yeah...

.........

I'm not sure where to start, but fine! Since it's you who's askin', Don...

...Alright. I'll tell you.

Don, you're aware I've lost my gang once before, right?

That's right. My gang... Di Soia Gang disappeared right after I was thrown into the bottomless abyss.

I had a hard time believin' it at first, too... But that's what I heard.

Nothing else had changed. Only difference? I wasn't there no more.

That's what happens when a gang boss goes missin'.

That's why I'm puttin' everythin' into protectin' you, Don.

I mean, there's also the fact that I respect you and all, of course.

Some of my guys managed to join other gangs after ours fell apart,

but the ones who failed to do even that... they got shoved to the bottom of the Witch Kingdom hierarchy.

I heard they're barely holdin' on...

The Order Family is huge, Don. It's on a different level from my little gang.

All these things happened when my gang fell apart. What do you think'll happen if the same thing happened to the Order Family? To all its members?

That's part of it. But I had another reason, too.

I didn't want the Order Family to fall.

That's exactly it. I wanted to be Boss of the Order Family.

I mean, who better than me would know the pain of watchin' your gang disappear?

The memories you've made with your fellow members. The blood, sweat, and tears you've poured into the gang...

All vanishin' like a wisp of smoke...

That's why I had to do somethin'.

...Truth is, I never have.

That's why I was so smitten with the Order Family.

It was a fully established gang.

All I had to do was get rid of the boss and take over.

That way, I felt I would just be returnin' to who I used to be. As if nothin' had ever changed.

But I get it now.

That I couldn't go back to who I used to be, even if I went through with that.

Even if I suddenly became Boss of the Order Family right now, none of it would have been mine.

How could somethin' you never worked for feel like it's yours?

If it's for you, Don, I'll do anythin'!

All I ask is for you to believe in me!

And, Don? I‘ve got a dream.

I wanna continue servin' you like I do now, and I wanna learn to be more like you.

That way, maybe I can be as respected as you are someday!

And if you acknowledge me, Boss, then everyone else will too, naturally.

Ow! What was that for, eh?!

But it's way cooler than "Master," don't you think?!

Rome, eh...? Which punk's callin' the shots over there?

Ah, I get it. Is that the new turf we're takin' over this time?

Just say the word! I'll wrap it up for you, lickety-split!