Risty's Story

*Sigh* That was close...

You know, Glove, your AI background makes you a really fast learner.

Ugh... I could've won this time! I'm so upset!

Can't let it go? How about one FINAL final game?

Yeah, let's go!

...NOT! Let's just stop here as we said earlier.

It's not like I'll win even if we keep going anyway.

You chicken? Bawk, baaaawk, bawk! Hahaha!

Fact: The real world exists outside your monitor. Go and touch grass.

Hmph! Thanks for the buzzkill. I was actually enjoying myself.

Anyway, how do you actually go about planting that dream you mentioned earlier?

There's no set way to do it. You should just try everything you can think of so that you can find your dream.

Hmm... So the ultimate goal of this mission is to identify what my dream is...

And once I achieve that, everything else is totally up to me? The mission area, the process, all of it?

Exactly!

If you feel stuck about where to start, I can search and recommend the optimal approach for you.

Oh? Got any good ideas?

Recommendation: Go outside with Glove, get some fresh air, meet various experts, and explore different professions.

What? You want me to go outside?

What for? I have all the world's knowledge and every expert opinion right here.

Including anonymous advice forums!

...Yeah, I didn't actually expect you to go outside anyway.

I'll just post a question here! This site has tons of active users online. We'll get a reply in no time!

Ok, let's see here...

The title... This should work!

What? That's so random...

Interesting right?! Doesn't it just make you wanna click it?

I don't know about that...

Now, for the actual body text... Short, simple, and to the point!

Risty... Are you sure about this...?

What if someone gets mad that the title doesn't match the post?

Oh, it's fine... As long as you don't cross the line, it'll be okay.

I've got a read on the darknet's vibe and flow, so don't worry too much, okay?

Now, if you're done objecting, I'm posting it!

I knew it! Replies are already pouring in! Hahaha!

Let's see how good these replies are.

Urgh... did I go too far with the title?

Ugh, ads! Skiiiip!

What the hell? There's nothing useful here!

Trust me, you can just skip posts with that thumbs-up emoticon. Okay, what's next?

Excuse me?! What did you just say?!

You want me to read it again? "You can find the answer to this anywhere if you..."

No, stop.

The nerve of this bastard to diss my question!

Just you wait. I'm gonna track you down.

How are you going to track them down? I thought it was all anonymous on here?

I have you, Glove!

What? Me?

After what you went through before, didn't you gain a new special ability?

Oh, you mean that reality-hacking ability?

Right. Would a simple hack like this be possible with that?

Hmm, theoretically, it's not impossible. I'll give it a try.

*Ding* Switching from Guest Mode to Administrator Mode.

Too easy!

Nice! Thanks, Glove!

No one can hide behind a mask of anonymity from me ever again!!! Hahaha.

Let's see their ID... IlilillIlIill? This cunning little jerk!

Their IP address shows they're also in Monatium...

Similar posts from the same IP show... they go from thread to thread just to start fights. They're super nasty, and they're a serial troll.

Well, that's all the info I need!

Okay, here's the original post, and this is the bastard's personal info. I'm sending this to the Monatium Cyber Police!

Justice has been served! Have fun in the slammer, barcode-username punk! Hehehe!

Uh, Risty?

Yeah? Did I get too carried away there?

No, that's not it. I was just going to suggest something.

Why don't you become a professional hacker...?

A professional hacker?

Yeah! I think it would fit you perfectly!

You've got talent, and you can use my abilities too!

What do you think? Hacking's fun, right?

Totally! I'm definitely a hacking noob, but...

Me? A hacker? Could I actually make a decent living doing that?

That would be completely up to you, Risty.

Okay, since you're feeling motivated, let's hit those hacker textbooks and start studying right away!

Study...? But I hate studying...

Think about this carefully, Risty. This is a critical moment where you can finally update your employment status from "Unemployed Bum" to "Job-Seeking Student".

Ohhh...

Okay! Starting today, my dream is to become a hacker!

I'm Job-Seeking Student Risty, now! No more Unemployed Bum Risty! Hahaha!

Great. Let's work hard to make this dream come true!

I'll be your reliable friend who stays by your side and provides support! You got this!

Thanks, Glove! I promise to give this my all!

Is there honestly a single elf here who can say they got this question wrong?

If you got this wrong, just pack it up and go home, okay?

There's no hope for you, so just give it up!

And don't even think of calling yourself an elf after this. Seriously.

I thought I signed up for the Beginners class... This feels like Advanced.

Urgh... Why is this so hard?!

I can ace the practical stuff, but the written part is totally holding me back!

I'm telling you, theory is a complete waste of time, no matter what you're studying!

*Sigh* I got the next one wrong too... My head is throbbing!

Okay, no breaks, let's jump right into the next question.

Ugh, I can't take this! I guess you have to take your own breaks with these online classes!

Okay, let's just pause you here for a moment!

Alright... I'll just cool my brain for a bit by messing around on the darknet...

Just 10 minutes, that's all. I swear, just 10 minutes!

What? It's already been 30 minutes?! Where did the time go?

Specifically, 34 minutes? What an awkwardly in-between number...

I already missed the target, so I might as well start up at the next round number.

Wow, a whole hour flew by...

I don't think I'll get any studying done today...

Ugh... Whatever! I swear... This time, I'm really gonna go back to studying, starting at the top of the hour on the dot!

Wahaha... This is fun.

Nothing beats browsing the darknet with a bag of potato chips!

Ugh, I could totally go for some Dr. Peppa. Maybe I'll order some delivery?

Whoa, the thread about Dr. Peppa is blowing up right now!

What happened?

And here I thought everyone hated it...

I see you've all opened your eyes to its incredible taste! Hahaha!

What?! Why does this lame bait post have so many upvotes?!

You guys have no taste!

No one insults me or my Dr. Peppa!

Hooo... Guess it's finally time to show off my skills.

A new player has entered, bastards! I'm going all out!!!

Graaaaaaagh!!!!

*Huff, huff* Only three more to go...

Dark Bullet, Revolution10, and Dream Phantom...

I recognize these usernames... They're always on the darknet, so they'll be tough to go up against...

Hah! Is this their first time in a flame war or something? You lose the moment you get salty.

What? They're all dropping their addresses...?!

Wow, they must really be angry...

Um, it looks like this is about to get messy, so I'll just sneak on out...

Yeah, that was a pretty cool way to exit.

Phew... Let's get back to that online lecture now.

What the hell?! These bastards are totally talking smack about me!

If these bastards wanna fight me for real, I'm down to meet up IRL!

Hmph! Just tell me when and where!

Tomorrow? Fine! I'll show you what's what!

It's judgment day! With Glove's reality hacking skills, you're all gonna get it!

*Snore*

*Snoooooooore*

Hey, you in the next room! Stop your snoring, will you?!

It's so loud! I can't focus on my novel!

Hehehe... *Mumble, mumble*

I'm gonna be the best hacker! I'll show you all!

*Yaaawn* Who the heck is banging on my door first thing in the morning...?!

Oh, hi, Master.

H-Huh? You come all this way just to ask me THAT?

Why would I air it out?

H-Hey... It's a bit messy in here!

You're just barging in? Don't say I didn't warn you!

D-Don't turn on the lights!

I DID warn you...

And I'll take being a legend... Ehehe... hehehehe...!

Ummm... Probably when I moved my base here?

It's fine, Master!

Even if we break our backs cleaning, it'll just get dirty again in a day!

Eventually, it'll just go back to looking like this again...

So there's no point in cleaning at all!

Since you're here, though, let's play a two-player game instead!

Listen, do you really think I keep any of those here?

Ugh, seriously? Nah... I can't be bothered...

Tch... That's low! Using food to threaten me!

Fine, whatever, I'll just do the dishes, okay?

Honestly, I haven't had any water lately since I didn't have any clean cups.

Oh, that? I think it's some leftover cheese from a while back.

That's a cherished item of mine. It's like a mascot here. Even I don't know where it came from.

Oh, just leave that there. I'm pretty sure it's a headset I used to use.

What day is it today?

I went to sleep on Monday... It looks like I slept for three days straight.

If you stay up all week studying and gaming, it just happens...

It's not that hard! You can do it too, Master!

Master... Don't you see? I'm already one with this place!

This is the place that suits me best, and it's where I need to be. I'm happy here!

If the world tries to impose cleanliness upon me, I will stubbornly pursue filth!

Ehehe! Okay, I'll try!

Where... is this?

It seems there are some werebeasts about, so maybe I'm near the Werebeast Village?

Ugh, I only came out for a short walk. What the hell?

I SAW you move one extra space! I can't let you get away with that kind of cheap stunt, even if you are the captain!

You said my piece was agile! It moved an extra space because of its speed and momentum!

That was just flavor! Agility has no effect whatsoever in this cruel capitalist world!

Even if you moved that extra space, it's not like you can buy the land anyway! You have no money, Captain!

It just feels good to go an extra space, okay?!

Agility, momentum, flavor, money...?

Are they playing a game? Perfect. I can go check it out and ask for directions while I'm at it!

Oh, that's not how you play this.

Yikes! You rolled a one?! Wow, your luck stinks!

Wahaha! That's it! It's game over!

You're bankrupt, Captain. Hurry up and sell all your buildings.

Ugh... This doesn't count! Let's do it again!

Bwahaha! How pathetic!

Hey! Will you shut it? I can't focus on the game with all the noise you're making!

I don't think you have a knack for real estate games like this, Captain.

That's because this stupid elf keeps yapping and distracting me!

Forget this! Let's start the game over!

This happens so often that I'm not surprised anymore.

By the way, where the heck did you come from, elf?

Me? I was out for a walk, and I seem to have lost my way.

Hey, if you guys are starting over again from the beginning, mind if I join?

Huh? You know this game, too?

Of course! Isn't it the Game of Elf Life?

Hmph! That name has been discarded a long time ago! Let me tell you about this game...

Beni and I worked our tails off to modify this. It is the culmination of all the joys and sorrows of the werebeasts encapsulated into a board game... The Game of Werebeast Life!

That's some dedication! You have my respect!

Anyway, you'll let me join, right?

Fine, you noisy elf! I will let you join our game just this once!

However! If you lose this game, you will clean every bathroom in Werebeast Forest as punishment for getting in my way earlier!

But that's what Chief told US to do, Captain...

Shut it! It's better for all of us if we just get this idiot to do the work, isn't it?

Oh? Sure, what the hell. A little wager will make this all the more interesting!

It's been a while, let's show them what I can do!

Hehehe... Time for the Game of Werebeast Life to begin! Loser cleans the bathrooms!

A 12! You rolled doubles, so you get to roll again!

Nice! I've totally got Lady Luck on my side today, don't I?

Damn! You keep rolling doubles! I'll never get a turn!

I'll build Monatium 25 here and hold a Buy-One-Get-One-Free sale on all products!

The rent's doubled! I don't think you can beat me now, Tig.

This is the same as the last game, Captain... If you're not careful, you'll go bankrupt again.

Help us, Captain; you're our only hope! You cannot fall here!

Hmph! No one knows what'll happen! It's not over 'til it's over!

You guys teamed up on me in a one-on-one game, and you still got destroyed?!

Oh, maybe I'm just too good.

Am I smurfing a bunch of noobs right now? Wahahaha!!!

Having such a big lead is boring. I'll pass on this extra chance!

Argh... That little...!

Captain, ignore her taunts and just roll the dice before that elf changes her mind.

Hoo... yeah, my piece grows stronger in the face of adversity!

Make way for my dice roll!

W-Wow...

Captain... of all the spaces you could have landed on... you had to land on Monatium, where the rent is 128 times the base value!

A loan! I'll just take out a loan! I'll just pay with one of those!

We've already taken out two loans...

Besides, that second time, you just bent the rules without even asking for my consent, didn't you?

And you STILL couldn't win... Wow, you guys are really something...

You're all part of the same guild, yet your teamwork is terrible.

What's the name of your guild again? Noob Rebels? Hah!!

.........

Okay, that's game! Tig, the noob, goes bankrupt! Risty, the billionaire, wins! Wahahaha!

Wanna go at it again? What should we wager this time? I'm a little hungry, so how about loser buys?

Get out of my sight, you noisy elf. Now.

Huh? Why?! We only played one game!

Leave before my hand slips, and I lose control of this sword.

GRAAAAAARGH!!!

Oh no! Captain's snapped!

When Captain's like this, not even we can stop her! You should get lost and get back to your city before she gets even more agitated!

W-Whaaat?!

O-Okay! I'm leaving, I'm leaving!

Pathetic elf! I'll crush you with my own hands someday!!

I will never forget today's humiliation! NEVER!!!

Ugh, this is why I can't do offline games.

Just when things start to get fun, someone gets worked up and comes after you with hatred in their eyes.

Hehe, still... It's been a while, and that was fun!

By the way... how do I get to Monatium from here again...? Hehe.

Oof, I barely scraped by again this month.

After scrounging up a bit here and a bit there, I was just able to make rent.

Next month will be a problem though...

Maybe I need to listen to Glove and get a part-time job or something.

Would it be like one of those job simulation games?

Right, let me browse through some of the job sites on the darknet.

I've got my studies and now a part-time job? I'm definitely hustling here! Hehehe.

Oh... These two look good... Decent conditions and good reviews.

The baker is warm, and the baked goods are hearty.

Sample a variety of new potions! You'll feel "healthy" in no time!

Mission locations: Sprite Kingdom! Witch Kingdom!

How to apply for both: Walk-in only, always hiring!

They say that finding a part-time gig these days is a needle in a haystack, but I suppose I can get a job at one of these two places.

You can totally do it, Risty! You got this!

Hello, I'm here about the listing on GlassFloor!

Have you filled the position yet? I was hoping to work here part-time!

*Cough!!!*

R-Really?! You want to work here?

Yes! Are you still hiring?

Yes, yes... Of course!

Perfect! I was just worrying about who to dump all those flyers on!

Huh? I got the job?

Mhmm! You're hired!

Whoa, that easy? Thank you! I'll do my best!

Acquired Title: Part-Timer! Now I have two titles!

What? Enough with the enthusiasm and get to work, part-timer!

Got it! What should I do? Make baked goods? Package them? Organize the display?

*Sigh* Is this your first job or something?

See that pile of flyers over there? Why do you think I have them stacked up? So that they'd be handed out, right?

This much, you should be able to figure out on your own, got it?

Oh, really?

By the way, what's the pay, boss? Minimum wage?

You're in training, okay?

That's something we'll discuss after you complete your probationary period. That's just professional courtesy.

Training you, feeding you baked goods... Honestly, I'm the one getting the short end of the stick here!

Huh? But this is completely different from the job posting.

Not to mention, the things you're saying are somewhat weird...

Are you trying to pull one over on me, boss?

Wh-What?! Pull one over on you?!

This totally sounds like you're exploiting someone who doesn't know any better.

How many others have you pulled this on so far?

Y-You've got some nerve talking to your boss like that!

Find me any sprite around here who runs a more honest business than me!

Oh, come on, admit it. You're totally power-tripping right now!

What's the difference between this and some scumbag swapping the item out of the trade window right at the last second?

Uh, let's get one thing straight. You're the one who came here looking for work. I never forced you, did I?

Figures an elf would have a victim complex!

You're temporarily fired! Hand out those flyers and get lost!

Wow, racial slurs AND unfair termination?

I can't believe stuff I've only heard about on the darknet is actually happening to me...

This is awesome! I can upload this with just a little bit of embellishing, and it'll get so many views!

Stop muttering to yourself and go hand those flyers out!

Why the hell should I? You're not even paying me!

Argh, you could've just said you won't do it! Why'd you have to go and throw the flyers on the ground?!

I'm resisting your power trip! I gotta toss a few hundred of these flyers about to make a good exit, right?

No one likes a post without a satisfying ending, you know?!

Argh! I don't understand anything you say!!

What's your name?! You must be a part of the Order too, does Master know that you go around acting like this?!

Mmm... It smells great in here! Is this that famous mint chocolate bread?

I came all this way for nothing, so I'll take one of these to cover my travel expenses!

Hey? That's theft! Give it back!

Genius Hacker has defeated Baker on a Power Trip.

Genius Hacker has exited the game.

Hey! Stop right there! I said stop!

Arrrrrgh!!!

Welcome... We don't get many elf customers these days.

What can I do you for? A reinvigorating potion? An energy booster?

Hello! I'm here about the GlassFloor posting!

Ah, you're here for the short-term job posting!

What is your health like generally? Do you respond well to medicine?

Excuse me? My health?

I think I'm doing okay... And I tend to respond well to medicine.

Mhmm, and your stamina? You look like you might be picky with food, yes...?

Are these job interview questions...?

Why is everything about my health or medicine? Is it because she sells potions here?

My stamina's not great, and I am a little picky... Does that mean I can't work here?

Hmm... a little disappointing, but we haven't had an applicant in months, so it can't be helped.

If you go in through the back door here, the senior part-timer will show you the ropes...

Oh, I got the job then? I'll do my best!

Huh? Who're you?

Ah... you must be the replacement, right?

Excuse me? Oh, yes! That's right!

Oh, she's not a witch; she's an elf.

*Sob* It's been ages since we had a new hire...

To ensure she falls in line and works hard in the future, I'd better establish the pecking order and break her in immediately, just like the senior witches who came before me did.

Seems you're late on your first day! Not a great start there.

Follow me. We've got a lot of work to do.

O-Okay!

Okay, let me use what I've just learned and mix a bit of this with a bit of that...?

Uh, no. Stop right there.

You can't just go about mixing whatever you want willy-nilly. If incompatible elixirs react and explode, are you going to take responsibility for it?

Ask before you try something if you don't know. Got it?

Oh, okay, got it.

Er, Senior? The supplies came in earlier... where should I put them?

Um, look... can't you see that I'm busy right now?

How long are you planning on asking me everything? Am I your teacher or something?

But... earlier, you told me to ask...

There's a time and place for everything. Is this your first job or something?

Wow... I can't deal with this garbage.

Wh-What did you say?!

Senior, being a part-timer is your greatest life achievement, isn't it?

U-Urgh... How did you...?!

No wonder you're here acting like a jerk!

*Sigh* I can't work under you, so I'll just take this potion as payment for today, okay?

No! That's super expensive! You couldn't afford it even if you worked all year!

Ohhh, really? I just chose it because it looked similar to the Super Advanced Rare Potion from my game. What can I say? Real recognize real.

I'll let the boss know you gave it to me as a gift.

Good luck with your part-time jobs and take care, you hear?

Put that potion back! I'm in the red again this month! Waaaaaah!

Destination locked! Firing up booster! Ready? Go!!!

Lights from buildings that never turn off... Elves busily rushing past...

Amid all this, I feel like I'm the only one out of sync with everything.

Is everyone just pushing forward through life while carrying the penalties and debuffs from work and society?

I quit two missions in one day... Am I really the social pariah like those darknet losers say?

*Sluuuuurp*

*Sigh* No matter what happens, you're always here to make me feel better, aren't you, Dr. Peppa...

Huh? Master?

Um... I've been through a lot today.

Wanna sit and have a Dr. Peppa with me, Master?

And that ends my story, young adventurer.

Oh, it's nothing like your day. You worked really hard all day, and you're just getting off work now.

Let's raise our drinks... for the poor little Job-Seeking—no, the lifelong Unemployed Bum!

Cheers! Come on! Cheers!

But... isn't this something a lot of elves go through?

I just snapped over a few words, burned all my bridges, and ran off.

R-Really? Hehe...

Huh? The Order hires part-timers, too?

Y-Yes!! I'll do it!!

Somehow, I feel like there won't be any bosses on power trips or toxic senior there!

Thank you, Master! I'll really work hard this time!

Thanks to you, I think I'll be able to focus on studying without worrying about rent!