Section 2: Nobbudamon Incident

Here we are. Kyoto.

So let me get this straight... Without waiting for the Meiji Restoration, the Tokugawa Bakufu just up and vanished like food around that blue Saber.

And instead, the Oda Bakufu popped up like kettle corn on Chaldea's movie nights?

Ugh! I don't know who did it, but I will NOT allow a new bakufu if I'm not the one who made it!!!

Hm? This shop's shiruko desserts are the best!

I want some, I want some! Chacha loves sweet shiruko soup! Stewing adzuki beans into a sweet soup is such a devilish idea!

It's scary-good!

Shiruko has always been sweet...

Wait a minute. Did shiruko even exist during your lifetime, Nobbu?

Yup. I picked up this guy once, real strange dude. He was a chef who made all kinda weird and exotic stuff.

But the shiruko he made by stewing adzuki beans was exquisite! Oichi and Chacha both loved it!

He dressed kinda weird, but he made delicious things, so Chacha loved him.

But then he just disappeared one day... The horror.

Uh...this doesn't sound like a super-accurate version of history.

I'm glad you are enjoying my food.

Eh? Me? U-um...I am just an insignificant town girl, so please do not mind me.

I did it! My part is done! (Victory dance)

Huh? That flashy-looking girl seemed familiar...

Oh, Chacha. You're spilling your shiruko. Come on now, wipe your mouth, too. And Senpai, please have some dumplings.

Hm. I thank you, boobie-somethingsomething.

Hey. Your dumplings look good too. Hand one to Chacha! Gimme!

What's with all the commotion?

Go take a look! The Oda and Shinsengumi folks are at each other's throats again!

...The Shinsengumi!?

What's wrong with you!? Why are you getting in the way? You're being disrespectful to Oda Nobunaga, the Demon King of the Sixth Heaven!

Shut up... It's the Shinsengumi's job to get rid of that...thing. Now die, all of you... If not, you'll all be exterminated!

Die or be exterminated? Eh? Isn't that the same thing? Just who is this fool!?

Dammit! I will not allow the galling lack of respect you've shown to me, the great Heroic Spirit Oda Nobunaga!

I am the unparalleled hero who will save Japan! Go, my elite Oda Bakufu goon squad!

Nobunobu!

Hmph. I don't care what you are! Just shut up and come at me!

That is...eh? N-Nobunaga?

Hm? Auntie is already here.

Th-there's another one of me...!? And not the bad me?

？！

No, no. I'm the real deal! If you're talking about the Demon King of the Sixth Heaven, Oda Nobunaga, then I'm the one and only!

It's true that Oda Nobunaga is commonly regarded as male... Does that mean our Nobunaga was a fake?

Now we are learning the real historical truth... Even His Highness had no clue that Auntie was a phony!

Et tu, Chacha!?

Argh! Okita! Say something! We're rivals, right? Tell them I'm the real Nobunaga!

...That's... No, it can't be...

...Okita!?

...M-Mr. Hijikata! It IS you, isn't it!?

...What's all this? ...Oh, Okita, it's only you.

Good timing. You go around from the right. Shinsengumi, advance!

I'm not ready! Wait, wait, what the heck's going on!? And who's the Nobbu lookalike!?

Heh heh. I'm glad you asked! I am one who has returned from beyond the veil of death to this age of decadence...

The Demon King of the Sixth Heaven, Oda Nobunaga!

Oh-ho... So there's another me in this world. Who'd have thought it!

Hm? Do I hear a voice that stirs feelings of nostalgia...and yet that I really don't want to hear?

What the what! It's you, Nobukatsu!

Oh crap! Big Sister!?

Arrrrgh...why are you here!?

That's my line! Why are you here!? And why are you calling yourself the Demon King of the Sixth Heaven!? And why did you make a new Oda Bakufu!?

Ack! Look, I have a perfectly good explanation. You see, the people cried out for a shining hero to save this world from its decadent ways!

Now that you mention it, I think Mother told me that she and Auntie had a dead younger brother.

At least I think she did.

Doesn't matter! Younger brother or not, taking my name is outrageous! I shall properly punish him!

Hey, girlie. That's my prey. Hands off.

Huh...? Who the heck are you? And do you know who I AM!?

Mr. Hijikata!? That Nobbu isn't the bad Nobbu...

Well, she's not exactly a particularly good Nobbu either...

Okita! When did you get so soft!? Are you planning on ending your life in shame!?

Just take my word and hold back for the time being, please! Nobbu, that's okay with you too, right? I beg of you too, Master!

？！

...Hmph. Fine. First we deal with Nobukatsu. Nobukatsu, where are you camped?

Lead the way. We'll talk when we get there.

Yes, Big Sister! This way! We, the army of the Oda Bakufu, will do our very absolute best! We'll work ourselves to the bone! Please show a little mercy!

Men, withdraw!

Nobunobu!

Tch. Fine. Okita! Back to headquarters!

Eh? Headquarters? As in, the Shinsengumi's? U-uh, well...

O-okay. Then, Master, please come with us!

What? Fujimaru is obviously coming with me.

What are you talking about!? Master is coming with me to Shinsengumi HQ!

Fool! Fujimaru is my retainer for all eternity!

There's no way I'm handing Master over to a puny man-slayers club!

Who are you calling "puny"!?

Come, Master. To the Shinsengumi with me.

No! Fujimaru is coming with me!

Chacha knows what this is. This is what you call a lover's quarrel.

Chacha knows all about it. I've seen my fair share of them. Many people fight over Chacha's affections.

Wh-what should we do, Senpai?

Hm! That's my Master! Chacha, you come too! I will solve this matter in one fell swoop!

B-but...! F-fine! Well...even if you say you want to join the Shinsengumi later, I'm not gonna let you!

Waaah! Master, you lawless ronin!

Goodbye. Now that I think about it, we didn't do any proper introductions, so farewell, frail-looking moe side character!

Wonderful choice, Master. In that case, I shall train you until you are a worthy soldier of the Shinsengumi!

Wh-what...!? Are you declining to be my retainer!? E-even Monkey was super excited to serve me!

Fool! Even if you come groveling back to beg for my forgiveness, you... you may or may not get it!

Auntie... What an unexpected fall from grace.

Trying to be all tsundere isn't going to fly in this Azuchi-Momoyama period!

？！

Eh? Chacha's going with you because you seem more interesting.

Actually, my feet hurt, so I just don't want to walk anymore.

If you're going somewhere, give me a piggyback ride! Carry Chacha!

...Th-this is turning out to be quite a bother, Senpai...