Charlotte: Worried, Rattled, and Distressed

Should I really just be enjoying myself in a swimsuit like this?

No. No, this isn't what I should be doing.

Servants are meant to fight for humanity, not to have fun in the sun.

But I can't help that I have feelings...instincts...a soul.

I may not need sleep or food to survive, like humans do...

...but I can, and eating and sleeping do help prevent me from mentally burning out.

Still, what would people think if they saw me just hanging out doing nothing of value?

Then, while I was driving myself crazy mulling things over, Anastasia came up with an unbelievable excuse:

Stop it, demon. Go back to hell and leave me be.

No, you're a demon. How else could you come up with a reason so irrefutably simple and logical?

It's true. She's right.

Master is always pushing himself so hard. He deserves to laugh and have as much fun as he can.

But, if the rest of us are all deadly serious about our work...

If we behave as no more than systems built to do nothing more than save humanity...

In essence, if Master is constantly surrounded by boring drones who only care about their jobs...

Well, he's not the kind of person who can laugh and enjoy himself all on his own.

So then, it's up to me to have fun. To be silly. To get carried away. To liven things up like it's my raison dêtre.

Because that's what Master needs right now!

...Ahh, Lord, please, forgive me my sins.

I prayed to God, made sure my smile was genuine, abandoned what little sense of shame I still had...

...and set out to see him.

Ugh, what kind of invitation is that? I feel like I just punched my inner self in the stomach.

？！

He accepted without a second thought. I feel like my inner self just broke out in a dance.

I'm so relieved it feels like my face is going to melt into a puddle of happiness.

But then the rational part of my brain warns me that I'm about to embarrass myself...

So I pinch my thigh to snap myself back to my senses.

I extend my hand, and he takes it with a warm smile.

...Now then. How should I go about making sure Master enjoys himself?

I sigh inwardly in disappointment. Once again, I'm ashamed of myself.

I should've been the one to choose an activity, but I ended up making you do it instead, Master.

I was terrified by the thought that you might simply turn down anything I suggested.

You flash a happy, carefree smile, and begin digging in the sand.

He gave it some thought, and said "Let's try building a sand Chaldea."

Come to think of it, what does Chaldea's exterior look like, anyway? Maybe I can ask Master about that while we work on it.

He gave it some thought, and said "Let's try building a castle for Mash."

...I have a feeling this is going to be a major undertaking.

You dove into the sea, looking like you were having the time of your life.

I jump in after you like it's no big deal, and start swimming around under the surface.

Since I'm a Servant, I should be able to open my eyes underwater without goggles, even in the ocean.

...Or so I thought.

We're here to hang out and have fun. Just forget about everything else for now.

But, I know our time is finite, short even. It won't be long now before it comes to an end.

And thinking about that makes me feel so guilty my chest aches.

Am I sure Master isn't just humoring me? Does he actually want to be here?

Once that anxiety sets in, I can't shake it no matter what.

The thoughts won't stop circling in my head. All of a sudden, Master stops and turns to me.

In an instant, my breath hitches.

Apparently, I can't even keep up the simplest act around him.

...Oh Master.

You're not just kind. You're naive. Dangerously so. Especially for me.

Oh no. I was so captivated by his sweet naivety that I let the truth slip out.

I can't believe I just said that.

I look at him. He looks back at me. This is so embarrassing. I want to look away, but I'm worried he'll hate me if I do.

I can feel my cheeks growing hot. I hope they haven't turned red, but that's surely a pipe dream.

I take a deep breath and pray that somehow, he hasn't noticed how deeply embarrassed I am.

Okay, Charlotte: What's the best thing to do here right now?

Make a complete one-eighty and beat a hasty retreat, of course.

It may be the coward's way out, but I don't mind.

I don't want to hurt anybody. I want to comfort the people I care about.

...Maybe we can't help but hurt each other eventually, but I still want to put that off for as long as I can.

If we know that pain and grief are inevitable...

...then I'd rather keep my feelings soft and pliable, like a marshmallow.

Some people seek out passionate love even if it means everyone involved gets hurt.

I'll admit, there's a part of me that likes that idea, too.

But, considering my circumstances, I simply can't entertain it.

Fujimaru nods, and we start walking back together.

The sun on the Caribbean Sea is dazzling, helping to ease my worries.

In the end, I wasn't any help at all.

Whether in life or in death, no matter how much I want to help the people I love...

I'm just too powerless to ever do anythi

Even as I say that, I get an idea for my next move.

He applauds when it's over, his face glowing with surprise and delight.

...Ahh.

This may not be much of a summer memory, but I'm still going to hold onto it forever.

I look up to see white clouds drifting across the azure sky.

I'm a little fed up at how those vivid colors threaten to overpower everything.

Please, don't blot out my heart. Don't blot out these bright summer memories.

My heart may be pale and faded...but as long as you don't drown it out, it can still remember this joyous blue.

So please...