Goddess Scripture 3 "(No Label)"

Goddess Scriptures confirmed. Beginning lesson now.

I once promised my daughter that I would share an incredible secret with her on her fourteenth birthday and encouraged her to grow up to be graceful, elegant, and bold in the meantime.

...And now, I might not live to see that day come. This is not good. Not good at all.

...All right, I guess I'd better get some practice in. Ahem. Testing, testing.

Make sure you're sitting down, because what I have to say may not be easy to hear.

I wrestled with myself for a long time over whether or not to tell you this.

To be honest, I'm still not sure it's the right decision.

Once you learn the truth, this very universe may no longer be a safe place to live.

But now that I know what they're planning, I've decided you need to know the truth one day.

You're a very intelligent girl. You may get a little wild sometimes, but I know it's all in good fun.

So I trust you'll understand what it is I have to tell you.

...Ahem. All right, so, um, first of all...

I'm not your real father.

Well, I should say I'm not your biological father. I would like to think that I am your real father in all the ways that count.

...But I guess how I feel about it isn't what matters now. Please listen, because this is the crucial part.

The Primordial Goddess from a civilization almost too ancient to even begin to contemplate is real. In fact, she's still alive today.

She chose to divide herself into good and evil halves, in the form of innocent, newborn, human children.

I'm sure you see where I'm going with this by now, but just to be clear...

My dear daughter. My beloved do-gooder. The truth is, you're one half of that goddess...

Which of course means that you're a true, genuine goddess. Just kidding! (Losing nerve)

...Hmm. Looks like I need a little more practice...

Error detected. Pausing playback and destroying tape now.