Section 5: Pumpkin Head Master

Guh... Are you all right, Elisabeth?

I-I'm a little dizzyyy♪ But otherwise okaaay♪

At leeeast♪ I'm pretty sure I'm not deaaad♪

Mordred! Napoleon!

Ooh la la! That was one hell of a blast.

...Now what's going on with this forest?

Damn, what the hell? We blew right by Fantasy Land and went straight to Nightmare Town.

How about you, Fujimaru? You doing oka

... ...I guess not...

Fujimaru? Is that really you!?

A-aaah! What happened to you, Puppy!?

Here. Just...look at your reflection in my sword.

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I-I'm not surprised, seeing as it's a pumpkin now...

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You calm now?

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I-it's certainly not something most people get to experience!

Poor Puppy...

... ...

...So, should I call you Pumpkin now, or...?

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(Honestly, I'm kinda impressed with how well he's taking this.)

(I'll say. He's one hell of a kid. All the crazy stuff he's been through must've really toughened him up.)

Anyway, that blast sent us flying so far, I got no clue where we are now. What kinda forest is this?

I'd like to find somewhere we can sit and think so we can plan our next move...

But unfortunately, it looks like we're pretty far away from our cottage.

I'm sure we can find another cottage heeere♪ Since these are fairy-tale woods, maybe we'll find one made out of candyyy♪

If you say so... Either way, there's not much point just standing around.

Let's start walking and see what we find.

On the one hand, I am certain this area should be a part of my nation. On the other, I do not recognize these woods.

Ugh. What bizarre, unpleasant woods. I know forest conservation is important, but I'm strongly tempted to burn the whole thing down.

I-I'm not sure that's a good ideeea♪

Did you not say earlier it would feel good to do just that? But, all right. I suppose it would be more prudent not to do so.

Yes, exactly.

I know these woods look quite bizarre, but I think they have their own unorthodox charm to them.

I mean, yeah, I can kind of see it... Huh?

I, uh... Hello.

Molay!? What are yooou doing heeere♪

You here to try and finish us off, bitch!?

Wait! Please! I surrender! I surrendeeer!

Would you look at that. Dead women do talk!

Easy, Mordred! All right, Grand Master, you do look a lot less evil than you did before.

So what's this about surrendering?

Exactly what I said. I surrender. I concede. I forfeit. I lost, you won.

That so? So what? That mean this Singularity's all taken care of, then?

'Cause it sure don't look that way to me.

Uh... Well, um, you see...

This is a liiittle embarrassing, but...

Fujimaru kind of went berserk...

And he, um...kind of sent me flying along with the rest of you...

Huh!?

Iä! Iä! Good morning, my little goatling!

In the name of the Mother, the Young, and the Depraved, I ask you to bless this land with your curse, O Holy Mother of the Abyss!

... ...

Huh? H-huh? Why are you glaring at me like that?

Oh no. Don't tell me your ability to tell friend from foe is on the fritz!?

It iiis!

Ahaaa! That's hilarious! And concerning!

Pyaaaaaa! Save meee! S'iiil vooous plaaaît!

I still don't know what happened. Did I skip a step or two in the ritual...?

Maybe pairing the Master of Chaldea with a Holy Grail wasn't the right fit for my god...

Maybe I was just plain unlucky?

At any rate, the way things are going now, Fujimaru is going to end up as an unthinking, unfeeling monster who only knows how to destroy everything around him.

I don't feel GREAT about letting that happen, so...

I get it's kind of rich for me to be asking this...

Can I please join your party!?

ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME!?

AAARE YOOOU FREEEAKIIING KIIIDDIIING MEEE♪

Peace, both of you. You needn't shout at her in stereo.

All right, explain yourself. What were you trying to accomplish?

Why, to summon the Holy Mother of the Abyss, of course. That's the only thing I've ever wanted.

Unfortunately, she just isn't strong enough to manifest in reality.

But, dreamlike as this Singularity is, I thought I might be able to draw her into it.

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Hehehe. I know what you're thinking. "It can't be a real god, right?"

True, I am an Innocent Monster. The Holy Mother may well just be a delusion of mine.

But, if she can become my ideal god...it doesn't really matter if she's real, does it?

And if this is all a dream anyway, then there's even less difference between what's real and what's not.

As long as I follow the ancient rituals and offer an appropriate sacrifice for the evening feast, the sacrament is sure to be fulfilled. That, at long last, will summon my ideal god!

...Or, um, that's what I thought would happen.

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O-oui. M-merci...

I never thought I'd hear such genuine sympathy from the victim of my own scheme. You're a much bigger person than I am, Master of Chaldea.

Fujimaru, huh. Hehehe.

All right, next question. How do we resolve this Singularity?

Oh, that? That's easy.

All you have to do is go back to that castle...

...and give the giant Fujimaru a good whack on the noggin. ...I think.

"You think"?

Am I then to understand that will do nothing to solve the other problem?

Geh. You figured that out?

Yes, I did. Now, tell us.

How do we get Fujimaru back to normal?

Um... Well...

Yes?

How can I put this...?

I, um, don't know if I'll be able to answer that until we get there...

Meaning, you do not know.

Heh, hehe, hehehe.

Simply laughing meekly will not help you avoid the question.

If you're going to be evil, then you must commit to being evil to the end! Without shame!

Pyaaa! That is harsh but fair! I-I'll do my best in the future!

So, basically...

We have to go back to that castle and do something about the giant Puppy?

Well, it ain't like letting Molay's plan succeed's gonna make anything better.

And it ain't lookin' like Fujimaru here's gonna get any better on his own, either. Hell, he's probably just gonna get worse.

So I guess we got no choice but to stop it.

There's a lot we don't know, so it's possible the ritual may fail even if we don't do anything.

And if that happens, it'll just mean the death of every Servant who got sucked into this dreamlike world. Oh, and the Master. No big deal.

How is that no big deal!?

Oh, forget it. Either way, it's pretty clear that we need to make our way back to that castle again. Also

Hm? What was that?

Oh no. Shhh. Everyone, be quiet.

When the ritual went off, this whole fairy-tale dreamworld got turned on its head.

This is no longer a happy forest from a children's story.

Now it's more...horrific nightmare forest prowled by Demonic Beasts and bloodthirsty killers.

So it's a haunted foreeest♪ At least it fits the Halloween theeeme♪

Stop singing! Do you WANT them to find us!?

The hell!? Whatever that thing is, it sounds huge!

Shhh! I-it's okay. It has to be okay.

The forest may be all twisted now, but this cottage still has a purpose.

Even in cursed woods, a cottage should still be a safe spot. Not even Demonic Beasts or bloodthirsty killers should be able to make it inside!

So as long as we don't go out...

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...

...

...

Musicaaals♪ Have their own conventions tooo♪

Whoa, the hell? Whatever that thing is, it's picking up the whole cottage with us in it!

So they can't come inside, but they can smash the whole thing to pieces!? Then what's the goddamn point!?

Dammit, and after we finally found a second cottage, too. Guess we're taking our chances outside, Pumpkin Master!

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So that's what was lifting the cottage. What an enormous tree monster!

A killer tree, huh!? Looks like we're going to have to drive it off somehow.

Come on, Jacques de Molay! You're helping, too!

Huh? I go way farther back in France's history than you do!

So who're you to give me orders!?

France's first emperor.

You know, I've said it before...but I'm still surprised to find out the famous Grand Master of the Knights Templar was actually a beautiful mademoiselle!

Guess it just goes to show you learn something new every day!

All right, we got it!

Phew. Th-that was exhausting...

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You did wonderfully.

Having said that, we really cannot leave you like this forever.

I only wish I knew what to do about it.

Don't worryyy♪ Love and justice always triumph in the eeend♪

Love, huh. I like that. It's true, there's nothing grander than love!

Not sure I buy it.

I hate to say it, but I think I'm with Molay on this one... Ugh.

Oh? Does this mean you and I could maybe get to be friends?

Shut up, assface.

Right. Of course.

All right, everyone...

Let's take a walk through these woods and see what's going on here!