Epilogue: Mysterious Ranmaru X

...Wake up, please.

...Hm? What is this place...?

I brought you here because I wanted to thank you.

To my self from a far-off land, I offer my thanks.

That voice... You sound just like me. Does that mean you're this planet's Mori Ranmaru?

Yes, I am. And thanks to you, I was able to keep my oath.

The oath to protect something of great importance which once belonged to my lord, Lady Nobunaga...

...Thank you. Thank you so much.

O-oh, that's okay. It was nothing, really.

If anything, you deserve all the credit for keeping such an important thing safe. You even went so far as to make it your Noble Phantasm.

You're an inspiration to every Ranmaru in this galaxy!

This galaxy...?

That reminds me. A lot of the things you've said were...odd.

They were?

I didn't think I said anything odd.

I mean what you said about this planet, the galaxy, "every Ranmaru"...

Well sure. I, Mysterious Ranmaru X, AM the greatest of all Ranmarus, after all.

Mysterious.

Ranmaru.

X.

Say whaaaaaat!?

Are you sure you don't mean you're a descendant? Or a future me that became a Servant?

You know, like one of those touching scenes, where the prayer I made on my deathbed crossed time and space to reach my descendant in the far-flung future?

No. I am a Servant, that much is true...

But, I won the Ranmaru Battle, a competition held on Planet Ranmaru to determine the strongest Ranmaru of them all.

That's how I gained the title of Mysterious Ranmaru X!

Wh-what in the world are you talking about? Why would my prayers reach someone like yo

(Gasp of realization) Hang on. Could it be...because of Lady Nobunaga's head?

I think I remember someone saying something about Lady Nobunaga's head spawning this Singularity, and it being a crossroads with unlimited possibilities...

Could that be why my prayers reached this weird Ranmaru from some other dimension or whatever?

Man, I knew Lady Nobunaga's head was important, but this is completely insane!

Is everything okay? You seem a little shocked.

Wait. Now that I've had a look at you... Aren't you a girl?

Wha...!? Where did that come from?

I-I'll have you know that's both my greatest secret and where the "Mysterious" in "Mysterious Ranmaru X" comes in!

I-I can't believe it... People used to say I was the most handsome young man of my time, and now, my descendant is...

No, wait. On second thought, if I'm to believe what you say, then you're not my descendant at all. You're...

Whether I'm a boy or a girl depends entirely on my Ranmanium growth cycle.

You could say that's why I harbor unlimited possibilities, or that it's my most mysterious aspec

Stop! No more sci-fi babble. It's time I got to the bottom of this once and for all!

Huh!? Wh-what do you think you're doing!?

I-I've never shown that secret to anyone. Not even Master!

Hey! Get back! Stay away from me, or I'll cut you down!

Come now, what's the harm, what's the harm?

You know, Lady Nobunaga used to do this all the time, but I've never tried it myself before. It's pretty fun!

Gyaaaaaaaaah! What do you think you're doing to yourself!?

I-I can't stay here any longer! If you'll excuse me, I really should be on my way!

Ah! Wait! Come back! I really wanted to clear this up once and for aaall!

Farewell, Lord Ranmaru from this planet.

Wait, wait. We haven't resolved anything here.

Mysterious Ranmaru X is a mystery for a reason.

Hey! I still have more to tell yo

Mysterious Ranmaru X, awaaay!

Waaait! Come back! I said I still have more to tell you!

...

...Well, if nothing else...

...I guess this means my prayers were answered.

It sounds like this Singularity was yet another major ordeal, Senpai.

I'm glad everyone came back safe and sound.

Oh, yes, I did! You can't ride out to battle without a war conch, after all! So as Chief Retainer, I tried to rise to the occasion!

？！

Oh good, here you are.

What are you two doing? Ranmaru's about to leave.

Oh, right. Ranmaru is returning to Planet Ranmaru today, right?

Come on, let's hurry. Everyone's waiting on the Storm Border's deck.

Let's go see Ranmaru off, Senpai!

Thank you all so much for coming to say goodbye.

Hey, you helped get my head back. It's the least I can do.

Man, I still can't believe Ranmaru went so far to keep my head safe...

Well done, Ranmaru. You did great.

Yes, I'm sure this planet's Ranmaru is overjoyed too.

I think the Ranmaru from this planet may have said something else, but I can't remember what.

Way to go, Naritoshi! ...Oh, right, you're not really him, are you? Aw, close enough!

My point is, as your big brother, I couldn't be prouder!

Thank you, Lord Nagayoshi! I think of you as my big brother, as well!

Aren't you all a little too keen to forget about Nagayoshi's actual little brother...?

Oh well, Ranmaru here's a good kid, too. No wonder the Mori clan was so accomplished!

Well, well, who do we have here? If it isn't Mori Yoshinari's son.

Who do you think you are, being Sister's favorite!?

Um, you do know that this Ranmaru is a totally different person, right?

Oh, deep down, they seem the same to me. It's very impressive.

All that aside, I think Mysterious Ranmaru X here might have the most nonsensical backstory of us all.

I don't know. I think Okita J. Souji could be pretty stiff competition in that department.

Jet Sandanzuki!

Yeah, no, when it comes to nonsense, my vote's definitely for her.

Here. Some Chaldea manjyu for the road.

Rengoku and I stayed up all night making them. They should make a good snack for the train ride back.

I really wish you wouldn't have me use my human form for every little thing like this.

Also, don't have them on the train. Wait till you get home.

Hm? Say, where're Sakamoto and Okada?

Oh, I already said goodbye to Lord Sakamoto and Lord Okada earlier!

I see. Okay, Ranmaru, take care of yourself.

Thank you. I will never forget what you all did for me.

Okay, it looks like this is goodbye. Farewell, everyone...

Take care, Ranmaru.

Watch yourself out there, you hear?

Okay, let's get going, Master.

？！

Huh? "Let's get going, Master"?

Wh-what are you talking about?

Oh, don't worry. There's enough room on my blade for us both.

I-I wasn't worried about that! I'm worried because it sounded like you wanted to take Senpai with you.

That's right. Master and I are going to live happily together on Planet Ranmaru.

Huh!? What in the world are you talking about!?

Master would never go to some nonsense planet like that!

But Master and I have forged a close bond during this adventure.

And besides, if Master stops being my Master...

...the rules forbid me from returning to my planet unless I kill him.

？！

At any rate, I AM going with Master, and that's that!

H-hey! Lemme go, shield girl and sickly lady!

No way! And who are you calling sickly!? Watch your mouth, or I'll slap a jetpack on you!

I-if Senpai is going, then I'm going, too!

Wahahahaha! This Ranmaru's a lot more entertaining than I expected! No, not just Ranmaru. Make that...

Mysterious Ranmaru X!

There you are, Izo.

Oh, it's you. Why're you still dressed like that? It's weird. Change back into your normal clothes.

You know, I was actually thinking the same thing. Okay, I'll change right now.

How's that?

There you go. That's a much better outfit for drinking.

...

Think I could have a drink, too?

Really? You want a drink? That's a surprise. Sure, bottoms up.

...

...Mmm, that's good.

...Yeah.

...

So where's Oryou?

She said I should go have a guys' night out for once.

Huh, did she now? That's damn considerate of her.

... ...Here, have another.

...Here's to Takechi-sensei, Shinbei, and Takasugi.

...Cheers.

To all the men who lived through the same time we did...

...this one's for you.