Showdown: Final Foreigner

Are you here!?

We're here, we're here! Keep it hell down!

And yeah, yeah, it makes your coat look cool or whatever, but would you freakin' cut it out with that wind thing you're always doing?

You certainly are a nitpicky one, aren't you. Well, no matter.

Fujimaru, I now know where XX is. However...

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...No, not a problem. It's just that she's in a very...unique environment.

It would be much better if you could save her, rather than defeat her.

Are you ready to leave? Then let us head for Kilauea.

So this is Kilauea... It really is just a vast expanse of rock as far as the eye can see.

It's still an active volcano, making it one of Hawaii's biggest tourist attractions.

It's also where Pele lives.

You could even buy a bunch of Pele merch at the nearby visitor center if you want.

I'd rec the Kilauea photo book myself. It's got pictures of some of its past eruptions, and

Man, enough with the tour! If I wanted a guide, I would've asked for one.

So, what do you want me to do here? Hm...? Isn't that...

Okay, three minutes after adding hot water...

...And done. Time to eat!

(Slurping noodles)

... ...Ahh.

...My stash isn't going to last much longer... Just my luck that the food supply doesn't get restored with each loop...

(Sigh) All that wonderful food in Luluhawa, and I'm stuck camping with galacta-spam and Cosmic Noodles.

At least I can grab lunch in Waikiki, but dinner's just too expensive...

And not only do they not accept Galactic Police Dollars here, I can't exchange for local currency...

So now I've got to work part-time at the hotel in the morning just to be able to afford lunch...

...and it's back to either spam or noodles... Some summer vacation this turned out to be...

...I think I might just be the unluckiest person in all of Luluhawa.

Heh.

If the people of Earth saw me now, I'd either die from the shame or kill them all before they cou

Wachoo!

...Sorry.

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... ...

(Putting away food)

(Separating trash from recyclables)

(Deep breath)

Well then...

You're dead!

Well crap. Looks like she's really out for blood now.

Hmm... Okay Master, we're not gonna be able to talk like this, so here's what we do.

We hit her until she's willing to listen to reason! Or at least until she can't hit us back anymore!

Now who's ready for some rock 'n' roooll!?

Hm. I'm suddenly inspired!

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You're taking what you saw to your graves! I'm going to make sure of that!

Grr... Purging Armor Set 1! This is nothing compared to all the overtime I've had to put in!

Now's our chance to get ready! ...Hm?

What's with that strange pose, XX?

And why are you all the way up there?

I'm putting a hundred percent into this battle. No, MORE than that!

？！

I'm going to erect a pillar of light right here!

My Rhongomyniad is the flight of stairs pointing the way to the literal end of the universe!

By releasing it, it will paradoxically indicate that this is indeed the end of the universe!

More specifically, this area will start to look more like an event horizon, and from there, I'll be able to wipe it and the Singularity out all at once!

Why!?

How'd you even come up with that!? What's wrong with you!?

I mean, I could tell just from looking at you that you were a freaking screwball, but still!

Now that things have come to this, I don't have any other choice.

As an investigator for the top secret (civilian) Galactic Police, I have a duty to fulfill. If I need to cross a few lines to do so, then so be it.

They'll probably slap me with a three-month suspension for doing this!

？！

XX's magical energy is rising rapidly! I think...she's about to release her fully powered Noble Phantasm!

Master, is everything good to go!?

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Take this! Sapphire Galaxy

You're hired!!!

... ...What did you just say?

Honestly, we're just so impressed with how strong you are!

At this point, we figured it would be way easier to recruit you than to defeat you!

In other words, we're trying to poach you! We want your strength and your badass outfit for our side!

...Y-you don't really think I'd fall for such a cheap ploy...do you?

(She's totally falling for it.)

(Totally.)

Now, now, just think about it.

You're sick of your toxic workplace, while we're living it up here in Luluhawa.

So if you join us, we can all have a rocking good time!

Am I right?

Monkey! I mean, Master!

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...A working conditions agreement...!

No way. All I have to do is use my Noble Phantasm once per day, and the rest of the time, I can just listen to someone drawl on about some king!?

(I get the feeling she's not hearing the full story, but I know better than to say something now.)

So I get a suite at a fancy hotel...

An all-you-can-eat breakfast buffet... Dinner at the restaurant...

And I only have to work from 2:00 to 5:00 p.m. each day!?

Is this real? Am I dreaming?

Luluhawa's amazing! The tropics are amazing!

Indeed, I was surprised as well. Living here would be enough to mellow anyone out.

So, what do you say? Well? Well? Well well well? (Musou Sandan negotiation tactics)

You need to ask!? Hya!

Oh no! I accidentally snapped the antenna I use to communicate with HQ! How clumsy of me!

Now I've got no choice but to ask the locals for help! Thanks for helping me, locals!

Awesome. (Thumbs up)

And now a high five!

Pretty great, right? No, no, don't say another word! I already know how awesome I am!

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...Well, on that note, let me reintroduce myself properly.

I am Heroine XX. From now on, I'll be working alongside all of you at Chaldea. Glad to be part of the team!

Oh, can I ask where my desk is?

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Aw crap, you're sticking her with me!? I've got my hands full of crazies as it is!

Do you have any idea how many bottles of antacid I'm already going through!?

So, can I go ahead and take my paid leave right now?

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Great. Then I'm gonna go check out this suite.

If you have any other questions for me, I'll be glad to answer them tomorrow.

Now then, if you'll excuse me...

Woohoooooo! Vacation, here I coooooome!

Ah.

...That was even faster than I expected.

Anyway, does this mean the situation with XX is resolved now?

I'd say so. ...Which just leaves the other situation.

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Right. But I guess we don't need to worry about it just yet. Oh, and one more thing.

You there, Count of Monte Cristo?

I am. What is it, Jeanne d'Arc?

Would you mind checking up on Kilauea regularly?

...Not at all.

Great, thanks.

'Course, as long as I'm not totally off the mark...

...I doubt anything's gonna happen.

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...I'm not...well... What would Holmes say if he was here?

"Now is not the time"?

There you go.

Okay then, let's head back. Now that this is taken care of, there's only one thing left to do.

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Exactly.

...But now, after so many freakin' loops, I'm starting to think even that's not really a problem.

Right now, there's something I'm still not sure about. Something I still can't put my finger on.

Whatever it is, it keeps eluding me. But once I finally figure it out...

...I'm sure I'll be able to draw something I'm happy with.