Section 4: The Three Empresses

...Almost all of the disgrace looming over Castle Csejte is due to Elisabeth's conduct in her later years.

She was a mad countess who bathed in the blood of her young female subjects in a horrendously misguided attempt to retain her youth.

A foolish woman and ardent admirer of dubious witchcraft...

An inhuman monster who brought destruction upon herself by preying upon the nobility in consequence of her own blind faith...

...Such disgrace is well beyond redemption.

She could have repented and become the greatest, most wonderful ruler of all time. But even that would not have been enough to atone for her horrific crimes.

But not me. I may be a new iteration of Elisabeth Báthory, but she and I are our own people.

I am a better Elisabeth Báthory than Elisabeth could ever hope to be. I am the ideal Elisabeth Báthory that Elisabeth only wishes she could be!

When she was alive, the real Elisabeth went mad from fear of losing her beauty, but I will neither age nor degrade.

After all, I'm made of steel. Both my body and my mind will last forever.

So rest assured, my faithful subjects. You no longer have anything to worry about.

I declare here and now that I will unify Castle Csejte's patchwork structure, preserve its dignity...

...and become the guardian that the people of this land deserve. From this moment forward, you will all fear and respect me accordingly.

I am your iron ruler. I am both compassionate and merciful, but I also have neither tears nor blood to shed. I am the Steel Demoness: Mecha Eli-chan!

We're waaay up here now. Even a Servant would just be a red smear if they fell from here...

I know my blood froze for a second when I slipped back there. At least we finally made it to the entrance.

(Cough, hack)... These high altitudes are hell on my throat...

I don't suppose you have any honey cough drops on you, do you, Puppy?

I have some honey, if you'd like.

Thanks!

You're welcome.

I keep it on hand to feed to my bats anyway, so...

Do you really need to keep those bats around!?

It's inverted.

Very inverted.

It certainly is inverted all right...

And here I thought we'd find Pharaoh Laughs-a-Lot being all:

"Mwahahahaha! Did you think I would be unable to sit atop my throne merely because it was inverted!?"

Glad it wasn't just me!

Don't you mean Fair-oh?

Ahem... I said nothing.

？！

Keh heh heh! How good of you to come, my elite warriors!

...Make that my elite warriors, and one useless princess.

In fact, now that I look closer, it seems that you are not my elite warriors at all.

Bwuh? Who're you talking about? This little princess doesn't have a clue!

You clearly need more training if YOU want to pass for a princess.

Trust me, I know what I'm talking about! I rose to the position of empress from very humble beginnings, you know!

Ghh...

Keh heh heh. Oh yes, I can see it clearly.

No matter how you try to dress it up, you cannot hide the fact that you lack experience.

Yes, I would agree with that. Your mannerisms are rather stilted.

What do you make of it, O famous Cobra Queen?

My name is Cleopatra!

I have no association with cobras whatsoever! Huh? You're asking why there's a cobra next to me?

An excellent question! Insolent, but spot-on! It is never a bad idea to compliment a lady on her choice of accessories!

Well, to answer your question...

This is merely an illusion created by the Pharaoh Fighting Style! You may think of it as one who "stands"!

Enough. This scene is starting to move me, so that will be all for tonight!

I see. What a pity.

I would have liked to showcase more traditional Egyptian posing, but I will be gracious and let you save face.

Now then... As far as I can tell, this so-called princess is a fake!

Hohoho, you can try and feign innocence all you like, but you cannot hide your fundamental lack of character!

...

You know of what I speak, do you not, Master of Chaldea?

How could you...?

Himeji Castle is the most beautiful castle in the world. As its ruler, I should be more pure of heart than anyone...

I can HEAR your uncertainty there!

？！

May I ask you something, Pharaoh Cleopatra?

Why are you obeying Mecha Eli-chan? This Csejte Pyramid Himeji Castle...

...Oof, that really is a mouthful, isn't it... At any rate, aren't you its rightful ruler?

No she's not! I am! Castle Csejte is still the base for all of this, you know!

That aside, I was going to ask the same thing! Why're you dancing to her tune, Cleopatra?

Hold your tongue, you salamander! I may be the last of my line, but I am still a pharaoh. I obey no other monarch!

In this case, I am merely doing what she tells me because for some reason I cannot seem to refuse!

Ohh, I get that. I've been there too.

I always find myself sticking with hopeless bosses, even when I know they're just spinning their wheels.

You stay out of this, pig. The grown-ups are talking!

Indeed, this is a matter of utmost importance. I am simply cooperating with her as part of a business arrangement.

Mecha Eli-chan has some great architectural skills. Her abundance of training gear alone was most impressive.

Treadmills. Tanning booths. Low-calorie gruel. Fat-burning electroshock equipment...

With facilities like that, I could finally bring back you-know-who's good looks!

I am only working with Mecha Eli-chan to make that precious dream a reality!

...Hmph. If your goal is to lose weight, I could handle that for you easily.

I have no end of torture instruments that will carve off all that excess flab!

Um... I'm pretty sure Cleopatra doesn't actually want Caesar to suffer, so...

Fou.

Fuyaaah!

Ah, right. You are not a fan of cats, are you, Nite-Brite?

I fail to understand how you can be fine with snakes but helpless around cats, Nite-Brite.

Transmission or not, a cat is still a cat! You little fur ball! I'll... I'll...

I'll hang you upside down and have your guts for garters!

Fouuu!

F-Fou is in very high spirits as well! P-please settle down, Fou!

Graaah!

Come Carmilla, Cleopatra! Let us show these insolent fools our Triple Empress Torture Stream!

Huh? Hang on! I might be an empress, but I'm really not into torture!

Brite!

Patra!

Er, um... Milla?

Drat... What a colossal failure. Where did I go wrong?

Hmm. If I had to guess, I'd say that we shouldn't have chosen this battle for our first team up.

What else could it be?

Indeed. I was never even told ahead of time that we WOULD be teaming up...

I admit it was a spur-of-the-moment decision, but I really thought it would work...

Jerk! Idiot! Dummy!

Yeah! What she said!

Teehee! Ahh, I feel much better now!

Now come on, we're almost to my tower! Soon we'll have both our sanctuaries back!

Yeah, that reminds me. Once we take back your tower, will you be able to get Himeji Castle off my castle?

Uhh.

Uhh... Y'see... I sorta...don't really know why it even ended up here myself, so...

Figures. Just 'cause you're the castle's lord doesn't mean you would have a Noble Phantasm that could move it. I bet only emperor Heroic Spirits can do that kinda thing.

Oh well, we can figure out how to float it off later. Who knows, maybe we'll even find another Holy Grail fragment lying around somewhere!

Uh, it's not like Holy Grail fragments are just scattered around, lying about...

Actually, the year before last's Halloween debacle all began when Elisabeth found a Holy Grail fragment in France, so...

Welp, guess I stand corrected.

A Holy Grail, huh...

Anyway, this tower place should be a lot easier to climb than the others. Let's go check it out, Master!