Wall 15: Resting Scene at the Fountain

Mmm. Yup. No matter how many times I look at it, I still love this terrain. Especially how the water's almost perfectly still.

I can't shake the feeling something could pop out at any second, but since I'm inside the simulator

No, wait. Now that I think of it, I don't actually know much about what the simulator does.

Maybe...there's a chance I could find fossils in here!?

Aww, you think so too, huh!

Welp, I got nothing better to do now anyway, so I might as well start excavating! Just you wait, undiscovered Simulatorsaurus!

Ahh, I really am a bad, bad girl.

Even in this backwater spring in a dark and gloomy forest...

...just sitting in a chair and stretching my legs is enough to make it feel like a five-star resort.

Hehe, I can't help but envy all the lucky souls who get to see me like this!

Well, don't hold back on my account, my Good-Looking Braves! Sing, dance, and make merry! Just don't forget to pay me my due respects while you're at it!

In the meantime, I'll allow one of you to bring me a cute cocktail from the bar. First come, first TO serve (me)!

Um, you do know what happens to people who party too much in movies, right? You may want to be more careful...

Huh? I have no idea what you're talking about.

... ...

You know, I don't see you around much, but I bet you'd shine pretty bright with a little polish.

...I'm sorry?

Lately, taking Debbie Downers who're all like "I don't need to be happy. It doesn't suit me, anyway"...

...and forcing them out of their shell has been kind of my thing, so...

...Ahem!

Anyway, come with me. Don't worry. I don't bite.

Th-thanks, but no thanks!

I know we're in a forest instead of the mountains, and a spring instead of a lake...

...but this is still bringing back less-than-pleasant memories for me.

Really? I don't have any memories like that at all!

YOU'RE the one responsible for them, dammit!

Wooo! I can't believe Lady Yu is pinching my cheek! Is this what heaven is like?

Hm? What's that sound?

Blondy, Blondy, Blondyyy! You've gotta save meee!!!

GRAAAAAAHHH!!!

Wh-what the...!?

The hell's goin' on here!? Aw, dammit!

GGGHHH... GHHH!!!

Easy there, Eric! Tell me what the hell happened!

I mean, I'm sure Kiyoko there's got somethin' to do with it, but still!

What was that, Kaidoumaru!?

...Okay, so Er-Er here's pretty scary-looking, right? I mean, they don't name people "Bloodaxe" 'cause they're good at, like, gardening or whatever.

But then I started imagining him just carrying a really fancy axe, so he didn't seem so scary anymore. In fact, he looked kinda cute.

Then I decided to decorate the heck out of his axe to match my mallet, and the next thing I knew...

...he'd gone totally berserk.

Well, no golden wonder! Kinda wish you'd thought twice before you decided to break out the rhinestones!

Gigi...Gi... Ki...Kin...

(Kin... Kintoki... Can you hear me...?)

(Whoa! Are you lucid right now, Eric!?)

(Please don't be too hard on her. I understand she was just trying to be nice in her own way.)

(But if my wife came by and saw another woman playing with my axe, I'd be embarrassed...which is to say, hexed to hell and gone.)

(I managed to cover it up by going berserk, but now I don't know what to do with my axe.)

(Would you mind if I cut you with it, Kintoki?)

Hell yes I would!

Whoa. I guess Berserkers really can communicate with each other without using words.

You don't understand him, Kiyoko? Seems like something you'd be able to...

...do!!!

Whuh-oh.

Both their axes went flying off into the spring.

(Downcast)

H-hey, I'm sorry, okay!? I didn't mean to!

Man, my axe is at the bottom of the spring too. How'm I gonna get it back...?

Hello, good protagonists. You seem to be in trouble.

Tell me, which axe did you drop? This gold axe, or this cryptocurrency axe that could make you a gazillionaire someday?

Who the hell're you!?

What do you mean? Isn't it beyond obvious that I'm the goddess of this spring?

Incidentally, those of you who answer this question honestly will receive payment wired directly to their newly created cryptocurrency account.

I'll just need you to sign this consent form before you can participate in this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.

Hmm, I don't suppose you have any cuter axes, do you? Maybe one that lights up and makes sounds for Blondy?

Oh my. I didn't expect to run into an investor interested in digital cosmetics.

Yes, of course I do. This demonic great axe here glows, hums...

...depletes things considered to be important of its bearer every time it's used, such as their savings or height.

Could ya leave my axe outta this?

... ...

(Investments that match my lifestyle, huh...)

Teehee, are you enjoying yourself, Reece? This water is nice and cool, isn't it?

Oh? What's wrong, Reece?

You were having so much fun just a moment ago, but now it seems like you're trying to hide.

Ahh. Now that was a great bath.

I-I guess there really are all kinds out there, huh...

Well...that just goes to show how rejuvenating this spring truly is, no matter who or what you are! (Saintly smile)